... (in no particular order) ...
Where I currently live in PA is intellectually dead. In August (08), I am moving to NYC, temporarily, for graduate school - see the schools section. Housing difficulties prevented my being there right now. I suppose that's not about me, though.
SOME OF MY MILITARY
I was an Army Paratrooper who dropped out of college (Philosophy major) and enlisted to serve during Operation Desert Storm and Operation Restore Hope (never deployed overseas), studied in different schools, but ended up driving a forklift and working with explosives and ammunition [had many different jobs, though, to include overseeing Base Operations and the Storage Office of an Ammunition/Explosive Warehousing and Distribution Complex]. I am currently listed as disabled, although I don't show it. I made peace with pain, but pain won't sign the treaty.
I do not, nor do I support blindly following anyone or anything for any reason other than dire crisis conjoined with inability to independently solve or resolve that crisis. In the Army, I learned to deal with, stay calm during, and possibly prevent crises. I learned many other skills and to think from other perspectives. I paid attention and learned. I, however, joined because I know that there are people in foreign countries who ruthlessly kill, rape, torture, impoverish, and starve others, and do this sometimes en masse. I wanted to do something to stop this and there were no other useful means in front of me. I do not support killing. But it hurt to know that others suffered in those ways. Human beings were much further from freedom than us. This is not the suffering of samsara. This is not what is meant to be. Something did need to be done. Then, and even now. There is not the precise technology to have foreknowledge and prevent denials of freedom of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. As horrible as war and combat are, as the psychological and philosophical harm war does to the collective of humanity on this planet, in this universe, we are still only working toward understanding the gravity and positive consequence of peace. Each individual is responsible for his or her own behavior, but people don't always choose to be responsible. People make excuses or believe they can avoid consequences. Everyone wants this bad stuff to go away, but it won't ... it won't on its own. You can't just point your finger at the bad person and say "No!," especially if they had a gun and you couldn't afford one. Bad leaders of the world do this. Those citizens who become victims don't have a choice. Just because it happens where it won't affect you and you can close your eyes and hum until the news is over, those others aren't safe because you feign yourself into ignorance. Would you volunteer to be in their place?
De oppresso liber (that motto is what inspired me to enlist, although I never got to the "Q Course")
MY SURROUNDINGS
I live with a pride of 6 happy cats and a kitten. I meditate, but not enough. My favorite incense is Patchouli, but I also burn Red Crystal by Drikung Charitable Society, Kagyudpa Institute; Nag Champa: Agarbatti and Super Hit (both by Shrinivas Sugandhalaya); Spiritual Guide by Padmini ( www.padmini.com ).
MY WRITING
I wrote a novel/fictional memoir as a first person, psychological and philosophical character development piece, exploring many modern issues such as: the effect of a decline in spirituality and care, the objectification of women, combat-related post traumatic stress disorder (CR-PTSD) as a tertiary character, the development of an unlikely relationship, and an ending ... (just seeing if you're paying attention).
MY PROFESSIONAL MOTIVATION
My direction, while I was finishing a degree post-military, changed when a mentor showed me the reality of the education system within an urban environment (Philadelphia). The focus of my future employment dramatically changed.
I worked with juveniles from Philly, labeled as "problems" and "delinquents," and saw their humanity. I did what I could, but it wasn't enough. I worked hard to earn the promotions to make more of a difference. It was never enough. I am compelled to return ... but in the form of prevention through positive change. No child should be thrown away - we all have a history, although no control of how or where our lives began.
I recognize the difference between "educate" and "teach." I am a teacher. My degree isn't in education. I currently teach life skills and positive behavior to specially-abled students, while I study the residential side of education. I am following a vision ... .
MY MIND
I study and think about the brain, perception, emotion/reaction, cognition, behavior, creativity and motivation to reaching potential. I think in terms of developmental evolution on not just modern individual and global scales, but also in a scale encompassing the scientific history of life in the developmental contexts of planetary, solar, galactic and universal systems, simultaneously. No, its not easy. Many distractions, ineffective reporting, limited mentors (until Grad school). Requires depth in breadth, lots of reading in subjects most would claim unrelated. Too much to explain in the 5 minute span most are willing to commit. Its easier to think and remember on a scale of using names of "models" as a replacement for the impoverishment of words; realizing that specific information can either be found already written down somewhere else (by someone else), calculated, or deduced/determined regressively through rational thought and logic.
ADHD VERSION OF MY LIFE
I have worked in many places since I was 14. I knew the smell of each soccer field in my county, as a kid. I failed Art History in college - I missed the midterm exam because I chose to sit with a baby bird that fell from a tree and couldn't fly, so it wouldn't die alone. I have seen what should never have been. I have drunk too much long before my night was through. I have made mistakes, but learned from them. I have made sacrifices and great choices, and learned from them, too. I will never give up. I have led a colorful past, yes, but I recognize the importance of growth. I now seek to achieve at my potential through deliberate choices in edible and mental nutrition.
MY BOOKMARKS
del.icio.us
A BRIEF THOUGHT
I am concerned for the people of this world. I am concerned with the tangibles and intangibles that are fed to and put in front of them.
MY FRIENDS SECTION
There are people in my friends box that I do not know, nor have I met. It is likely I may never meet some of them. I am not trying to fool any of you by having them there. The people I know are there because they have a page, here, and one of us has found the other. No one is intentionally excluded. Those that I do not know are there because there is something I saw that inspired me, someone who I want to support, or someone who I believe can make a positive contribution in their own way. Do not be impressed with me that people are here, but do use this as an opportunity to look at them ... maybe you'll see something, too.
