Wilaron profile picture

Wilaron

About Me

Report: 93% Of Drunk Drivers Get Home Just Fine August 8, 2008 | Issue 44•32WASHINGTON—According to a report released Monday by the National Institutes of Health, 93 percent of those who get behind the wheel while intoxicated arrive at their homes safe and sound, just like they told everybody they would. "Most of these people are barely even buzzed, and 87 percent of the time they're driving primarily on back roads for distances of like, eight miles, tops," said the study's lead author, Dr. Henry Tillman, adding that the vast majority of inebriated drivers stuck with only beer all night, so they were totally fine. "Roughly 64 percent of drunk drivers have cousins who are cops anyway, so it's really no big deal." The study concluded that a mere one in 15 drunk drivers end up dying in a cascading torrent of fire, so, you know, odds.
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William Aaron Cummings --
[noun]:
A real life muppet
'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 16/04/2006
Band Website: ummm....this one
Band Members: Since there is no band, (and for those of you who've been paying attention) no new songs, there are no members.
Influences: The Complete Recordings of Charley Patton in chronological order. On repeat.
Sounds Like: An exhausted version of me on a bourbon and nicotine binge circa 2005.
Record Label: corporate

My Blog

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