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DON'T LOOK DOWN, as we fall, DON'T LET GO This is too much to take alone [watching all the things we

About Me

o(^_-)o i'm a happy camper, even when i'm not camping.
i'm the asshole that calls anorexic bitches fat. and i talk during movies. and will probably eat only the cookie dough out of your cookie dough ice cream. and then say something like "isn't life just totally awesome and coooool?!"
I may not be a pirate or anything too interesting but i am that fruity medley of a punk/goth/gamer/athlete/semi-preppy/artist/drama-geek/ social butterfly/ a.d.H.d.-diagnosed/ rockstar-wannabe with a big smile and bigger dreams, always on the go that's good at telling cheesey jokes and making people smile :D...or at least give that "wtf?!" look (õ.ò) yay!
word has it on the street that in any scene, i'll fit in while still standing out. Like that weird teal-ish crayon that is the first one you notice in the box, but never color with it because you're too scared it'll ruin your picture.
i like proving things wrong. almost as much as i like being proven wrong.
i can't remember important things, directions, where i park, events, stuff i've studied 8 hours straight, or things that happened 5 minutes ago. BUT i remember ALL conversations and exactly how the words sounded. YES!
i'm way over-ambitious but totally unmotivated, and those 2 don't mix, so i'm just left paralyzed being an underachiever trapped in a day dream, procrastingating life.
My future career choice went from Vet to Chef to Construction werker to Film Director/Actress/Writer to FBI Agent to Rockstar! But I'm majoring in Science Edu at NCSU...and with that i'll be a FBI/SBI field agent for like 5 years and then be a highschool teacher, whilist doing film making, construction, and music making on the side...?
::last random fact no one asked for: i dont like showing emotions other than excitement, but a lot of things bother me. SUPER LONG LIST::
→ lies. square pizzas. over reacting. hypocracy.
→ politics. vegetarianism. gossip. preassumptions.
→ those thinking the world owes them something.
→ people that feel like they're something oh so special but no one gives them enough credit. ever question why?
→ meeting people on the internet.
→ reinteration. self-denial. projection. narcissts.
→ places not selling milkshakes. insecurity. body hair.
→ support groups/ organizations/cults. religion. terrorists.
→ selective rationalizing as a defense mechanism.
→ moochers. adults still living off they're parents. flaunters.
→ jealousy. comparing to less. envy. flirts. shaved sheep.
→ ignorance. [being against stem cell research]
→ people against abortion yet use birth control; "cuz it's ok to kill the cells before they touch but OH NO, NOT AFTER! SIN!" -_- ignorance x2
→ borrowed things being ruined or never returned.
→ manipulation. complaining. puppies wearing clothes.
→ road rage. healthfreaks. the jail system. most other systems.
→ pointy shoes. bragging. fishing for complements.
→ posting bullitens asking for picture comments because you have no life and only get-off on 'compliments' you ask for.
→ racism. discrimination. protests. homework. control freaks.
→ unmutual feelings. being left wondering. infatuation.
→ division between males and females [as if 'guys do this, and woman do that', when it's more like 'some people do this, and some people do that', gender or race or any other generalization is irrelevant. i mean most woman suck at driving, but a lot of guys do too :P ]
→ people against issues that don't even effect them [i.e. abortion or gay marriage: are you a pregnant bitch? no? so why the fuck do you care if a pool of barely developed cells is sucked out of a woman you don't even know? are you gay? no? so why do you care if homosexual couples get married? it doesn't effect you!]
→ and the biggest thing that pisses me off: people making conclusions by coorelating uncorrelating events, i.e. like taking "2" and "2" to conclude "4" while ignoring the fact that there were more "numbers" in the "equation;" "2" not even being one of them since it was a "square root" you just didn't recognize because you only look at what will appear in your favor [ok using numbers was a bad analogy for skewed conclusions, hopefully you get it]

Take the quiz:
Which Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle are You?

Donatello
You're the natural born, 'Mr. Fixit'. You're also considered the most reserved, preoccupied with your own little thoughts and ideas. But that doesn't mean you don't hang with your family and friends! But, you still find it easy to get lost in your own thoughts...daydreaming often. You'd rather talk things out than fight. You long for a day when there's nothing but peace in the world, and when you can finally rest with your own thoughts. Violence is something the world could completely live without. One of your labels may be, 'true to blue friend'. You're strong at heart and powerful at mind.
Quizzes by myYearbook.com -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!
Name: KaRi, Pixie, Agent Orange, Kunoichi, Siren/Cyron, Cinnomin, Negative Nine, Beast, ninja pirate that's not really a pirate
Birthdate: july 8/june 38
Birthplace: albany NY
Current Location: downtown raleigh, NC
Eye Color: greenish
Hair Color: brownish
Height: shortish [5'1'']
Weight: 111
Piercings: 11 so far
Tatoos: 1 so far
Boyfriend/Girlfriend: i think he was just pretending
Overused Phraze: "its a trap!"
FAVORITES
Food: my top 3: ice cream, bbq ribs, fried chicken
Candy: white chocolate m&ms
Number: -9
Color: ORANGE
Animal: polar bears, goats, hamsters, capyberas
Drink: milkshakes!
Alcohol Drink: AFTERSHOCK
Bagel: any overloaded with creamy cheesey!
Letter: i. but o looks like a bagel ^_^
Body Part on Opposite sex: tongue. pierced. if they know how to use it. ^_-
This or That
Pepsi or Coke: which ever is on sale at Food Lion
McDonalds or BurgerKing: ewww i eat real food made with real meat
Strawberry or Watermelon: fruit is not the food of a mighty warriorrr
Hot tea or Ice tea: neither
Chocolate or Vanilla both arouse me equally
Hot Chocolate or Coffee: both mixed together
Kiss or Hug: both at the same time
Dog or Cat: cats
Rap or Punk: eh i listen to both occaisonally, but i prefer better music than that
Summer or Winter: summer! wait, in the winter you're ice cream won't melt...hmmmm
Scary Movies or Funny Movies: what's the difference? :D
Love or Money: well money never hurts someone
YOUR...
Bedtime: whenever
Most Missed Memory: being in love
Best phyiscal feature: that round n firm thing behind meh *giggidy!*
First Thought Waking Up:
Goal for this year: just one? i have 100s
Best Friends: i have like 15 bestests
Weakness: my x.
Fears: never being happy again
Heritage: mostly italian & arabic. [mofia and terrorist]
Longest relationship: 8 months
HAVE YOU...
Ever Drank: duh, i think we die after like 3 days of not drinking ^^
Ever Smoked: yes, does that make me cool now?
Pot: i just use pots for cooking...
Ever been Drunk: oh yes
Ever been beaten up: yes
Ever beaten someone up: oh yes
Ever Shoplifted: i know i'm strong and all, but i really can't lift up a shop :P
Ever Skinny Dipped: hehehhhhhhe yes indeedy
Ever Kissed Opposite sex: not as many as you've fucked
Been Dumped Lately: yeah. "one of these days you're gonna realize just what you've thrown away"
IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite Eye Color: blue
Favorite Hair Color: brown
Short or Long: short, but long enough to pull :P
Height: taller than me
Style: don't care
Looks or Personality: both are important, but personality definetly [funny, SUAVE, spontaneous, respectful, ambitious, apprieciative, never fails to amaze, likes it rough, opposite of me, one of a kind, sexier than johnny depp, oh the list goes on and on, i found him once.]
Hot or Cute beautiful.
Drugs and Alcohol: ehh. weak.
Muscular or Really Skinny: muscular n built ^_- i cannot stand skinny guys!!! eat more beef!
RANDOMS
Number of Regrets in the Past: 0 why would i do something if i'd regret it later??
What country do you want to Visit: japan
How do you want to Die: happy and accomplished all my goals. also in front of many young children on national TV
Been to the Mall Lately: yeah
Do you like Thunderstorms: my numba 1 turn-on
Get along with your Parents: sometimes
Health Freak: well i am a freak, but that's a different story ^_-
Do you think your Attractive: eh i'd do me. oh, and i HAVE!
Believe in Yourself: too much
Want to go to College: no but i'm there
Do you Smoke: occasionally i enjoy a cancer stick, but not too often
Do you Drink: occasionally, not too often.
Shower Daily: no. i do occasionally, not too often...lol jp
Been in Love: once. i'd do anything to go back.
Do you Sing: daily
Want to get Married: someday
Do you want Children: not for a VERY long time!
Have your future kids names planned out: Damien would be cool
Age you wanna lose your Virginity: i'm not waiting for an age, i'm waiting til i'm married. week-long wedding night? hell yeah! giggidy!
Hate anyone: no. i've learned everyone deserves to be on this earth. everyone. yes, even paris hilton. sadly.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

My Interests

in general: Accomplishing my goals.
Staring at the stars. and moon. and cool lights!
Never budging on anything I stand on.
Being with my friends. licking 9v batteries.
Playin in the rain. Woods. Cemetaries. Filming/Editing.
Makin Jackass videos/horror shorts/comedies/commericals/music videos.
Thinking and Pondering.

Deep conversations. Figuring people out. Drawing.
Writing [Lyrics & Philosophy & controversal blogs].
Singing. Listening. Making boring things unboring.
Dancing. Climbing buildings/trees.
Making clothes. Making waffle sandwiches. Building stuff.
Vampyres. Fairies. Knives. N64 (super smash bros!).
Concerts. Moshpits. Raves. GOTH CLUBS. the beach. Jetskiing.
Cookout. Steak n Shake. playing capture the flag. Pokemon!
Piercings. Tattoos. photography. dragons.
riding horses. tiping cows cleverly disguised as bulls.
the color orange . llamas. Adderall.
rolling around like a ninja pretending to be on a secret mission.
Fire. Cooking. Milkshakes. Hooter's Chickenwings. filling out surveys.
CAFFINEEEE!. sucking helium out of balloons. catching animals.
stocking shelves. Workingout. running. Paintball. Bein silly :D
Challenging people [to arm-wrestle/mud-wrestle/jello-wrestle/noodle-wrestle/
wrestle in anything really/twister/limbo/eating contests/pokemon battles/
who can ride an elevator the longest/etc
]

What weird misc. thing are you?
Wallama/Poking Smiley with stick
You're a little backwards and a little weird, but deep down, we all love you. You often look at other people and wonder how they can stand on their hind legs. I like you.

Click Here to Take This Quiz
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What kind of love do you have? ( 8 Results .. Pics )
DARK: You have a dark love, full of mystery and romance. No one knows what's going on except you and your partner. You thrill in cloaking yourself in mystery, and being the enigma everyone is trying to figure out.
Take this quiz !

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You Are a Powdered Devil's Food Donut
A total sweetheart on the outside, you love to fool people with your innocent image.
On the inside you're a little darker, richer, and more complex.
You're a hedonist who demands more than one pleasure at a time.
Decadent and daring, you test the limits of human indulgence. What Donut Are You?

The Keys to Your Heart


You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.
In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.
You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance.
Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.
In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

I'd like to meet:

no one on here. if i dont know you, i won't add you. you probably don't really look like you do in that funky angular picture and you probably aren't half as cool as you sound.
I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO MEET SOMEONE THAT DOESN'T LIE and ninjas, pirates, juggalos, ravers, breakdancers, Maddox, David Firth, Eminem, Marilyn Manson.

and my true love. i thought i met him but i was tricked. or maybe it really was right and the time was just wrong.

AND I'd like to meet This cool pussy:

i believe you can learn something from EVERYONE you meet, whether you end up liking them or not. Kinda like cookies, some are soft and delicous and make you happy, some are stale and bitter and make you angry. but, in the end, they're still cookies ^^

about 40 people should be on my top 8, So no, i don't have a top anything, this is MYspace, not my friend's space, and i'm not anal enough to rank everyone, playing the 'favorite' game, changing the order every so often just to make my friends feel shitty. you can do it, but i'm not. my friends know who they are and dont need a list to be reminded

this is getting ridiculous, go out and masterbate to something better than how many "friends" you have or how many comments you get. ,,|,, -_-,,|,,

Music:

mostly rock: hardcore, experimental, grunge, nu-metal [not death/black metal], alternative, punk, industrial, e.b.m, electronic, new-wave, thrash, and j-rock. Even some Christian rock. Really anything but classic rock or acoustic. also some rap, hip-hop, reggae, SOME pop, but please, not too much ^_^

Labeled JACK OFF JILL. Scarling. M.S.I. KoRn, Marilyn Manson, P.O.D, Eminem, Limp Bizkit, Adema

Linkin Park, Scars of Life, Kittie, A Perfect Circle, 30 Seconds to Mars, Orgy, ill Nino, Psyclon Nine, NIN, Birthday Massacre, Rob Zombie, God Module, Gary Numan, Dismantled, the Cruxshadows, Combichrist,Bl00dhound Gang, Lacuna Coil, Icon of Coil, Grendel, VNVNation, Covenant, SystemSyn, Dawn of Ashes, Ministry, Imperative Reaction, Kidney Thieves, Slipknot, Thousand Foot Krutch, Postal Service, S.o.A.D, Smashing Pumpkins, Breaking Benjamin, Deftones, Disturbed, Dawn of Ashes, Blink182, Chevelle, I.C.P, C.K.Y, TOOL, Atreyo, T.a.t.U, Mudvayne, Nightwish, NothingFace, Garbage, the killers, Coheed & Cambria, Finch, Nickleback, Fort Minor, A.f.i, SpineShank, Remembering Never, Devil Driver, In flames, Killswitch Engage, Pink Floyd, Pantera, Unternull Jump Little Children... Nas, D-12, X-tina, Avril, Beyonce. Dir en Grey, D'espair's Ray, Malice Mizer, MDM, Psycho lo comu, Rammstein, Megaherz, Zeromancer

Not so Labeled AbbyNormal, Hollywood Undead, Straightline Stitch, DESPAIR, Seraphim System, Obsidian, HellTrash, SLUGNUT, servo.hatred, Eric Ortiz, Marazene, Ratte', KnowLyfe, Rikets, Autohypnosis, and like 30 others that you can find in my friend list if you're interested.

Movies:

Why watch a movie when you can MAKE one? But I'll watch any horror/suspense/gore/comedy

Some favs: Saw III [and I and II], Mr & Mrs Smith, Jackass II, Harold and Kumar go to White Castle

Television:

Naruto. Aqua Teen Hunger Force. South Park. Venture Bros. Family Guy. Spongebob. Robot Chicken. And sometimes Jackass and Wild Boyz (just to see my competition) ^.^ But most everything else is just shit. like you. :)

Books:

"Catcher in the Rye" is the only novel I have ever held interest in, if the character Holden was real, he'd totally be my best friend. and Herman Hesse's "Siddartha" was cool. and nonfiction like Steven Hawkin's "Brief History in Time" got me lost in thought about the universal for hours

i do plan on writing a book someday with my lady Vassa

Want to be as manly as me?

buy Maddox's book

Heroes:

Aristotle, Maddox, Eric Cartman, Tom Green, Steven Hawking, David Firth, Marily Manson, Jesicka from Jack off Jill/Scarling, Mr. Madman! and God- Its quite impressive having so much recognition considering he doesn't even exist.

You Are a "Don't Tread On Me" Libertarian

You distrust the government, are fiercely independent, and don't belong in either party.Religion and politics should never mix, in your opinion... and you feel opressed by both.You don't want the government to cramp your self made style. Or anyone else's for that matter.You're proud to say that you're PRO-CHOICE ON ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING! What political persuasion are you?

DONT adopt your own virtual pet!

My Blog

looking at the milkshake half empty

everything's frustrating 1. i used to love my job but the new management and new co-workers take out what was once fun. i wish a new sexy stocker would come in. the trucks come in at 4am instead of ...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Wed, 30 May 2007 04:58:00 PST

ewww

i just weighed myself 106.   i havent been that little since high school i def havent been eating much because i'm so sad but when i do eat it's always junk like cookies, oatmeal cream p...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Thu, 03 May 2007 08:33:00 PST

progressive update: same thought, different level *lvl up* +2

sooo... the burning inside has faded the butterflies are no longer in flames they finally fell to ashes to the pit of my stomach blown away as i exhale [ooo poeticness-ish...ly metaphorical almo...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Mon, 30 Apr 2007 10:15:00 PST

ok i'm done complaining and i'm sorry for bothering you

i don't consider myself over-dramatic, just a hardcore extremist. so if some thing is good, it's OMG SUPER GOOD, LIKE THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD NEXT TO DRINKING A MILKSHAKE WHILE SITTING ON SOMEONE...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Wed, 18 Apr 2007 05:00:00 PST

[no title could describe this pain]

i feel so hollow inside like someone carved out my insides with a rusty fork and just left me laying here it burns my heart is being choked the air i breath feels like shards of glass i would rat...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Sun, 15 Apr 2007 11:42:00 PST

"the nervous system is down"

"i wanna live, i wanna love, but it's a long hard road, OUTTA HELLyou never said forever, could ever hurt like this" - mansonwhere did my strength go? i used to be an unneedy independent loner. psh i ...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Sun, 08 Apr 2007 01:05:00 PST

i'm running away

OMG I HAVEN'T BEEN THIS EXCITED SINCE LAST TIME I WAS THIS EXCITED! AND I DON'T REMEMBER WHEN THAT WAS!IT'S SPRING BREAK!go to a super cool party? hang out with super cool friends? go to the beach or ...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Sun, 04 Mar 2007 03:18:00 PST

wasting time about wasting time, my mental distortion, & why rainbows aren't as gay as you

[starts out like i'm venting, but i'm not, and gets off subject yet still totally on it, and kinda philosophical. maybe it'll change your perspective? or hopefully get you to change mine, that'd be aw...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Sat, 10 Feb 2007 01:36:00 PST

whoa i havent posted a blog since LAST YEAR!

[2006 was the craziest year in my life so far] i'm rather upset i had this small list of things to get done last semester. it seemed like only a month's worth of productivity. Well only 3 items hav...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Thu, 04 Jan 2007 01:12:00 PST

yay

life is so close to perfect, if it was any closer, i wouldnt have any reason to live, because that would mean i'd have nothing to accomplish. nothing to live for. and i haven't accomplished more than ...
Posted by ←|<@®!→ on Thu, 31 Aug 2006 11:38:00 PST