David (Harry)

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Matthew 6:19-21
Armed with a labrador, a rover, GCSE maths, a gram of teen spirit and some string I come rolling through the hills of Shropshire to claim my place as the Lady of the hills. Lifeguards are us, and the devil take the hindemost. The greenhouse is warm, but the sheep are cool, and the rover goes chug chug chug. Ecstacy runs through my veins, your hands run down my back and information runs over my head. Hug a hoodie but protect endangered species. I drive too fast, eat too slow and think too little. The fires gone out but I'm still hot.
Girls night out
1. We have absolutely no idea where our purse is.. and for some reason, that's ok.
2. We believe that dancing with our arms overhead and wiggling our butts while yelling "WOO-HOO" is truly the sexiest dance move around.
3. In our last trip to pee, we realize that we now look more like a homeless hooker than the goddess we started out as just 4 hours ago.
4. We drop our 3am submarine sandwich/pizza slice/poutine on the floor, pick it up and continue eating it like its nobody's business.
5.We start crying and declare to everyone we see, including people we barely know, that we love them SOOOO MUCH.
7. We get extremely excited and jump up and down every time a new song comes on "OH MY GOD, I LOVE THIS SONG!"
8. The urge to take off articles of clothing, get up on the table or bar and start to sing or dance becomes strangely overwhelming to us.
9. Our eyes just won't seem to stay open by themselves, so we keep them half closed and think it looks incredibly sexy.
10. We yell at the bartender who we believe has cheated us by giving us just orange juice, but that's just because we can no longer taste the vodka.
11. We think we are in bed, but our pillow feels strangely like the floor.. or like the mop.
12. We start every conversation with a slurred "Don't take this the wrong way but..."
13. We fail to notice that the toilet lid is down before we sit on it.
14. Our hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.
15. We are tired, but we are troopers so instead of going home, we just sit on the floor wherever we are standing and take a quick nap.
16. We begin leaving the buttons open on our button fly jeans to cut down on the time we're in the bathroom away from our drink.
17. We take our shoes off because a) they're ridiculously impractical.. but soo beautiful! b) We believe it's the shoes' fault that we can't walk straight.
18. We feel oddly comfortable sitting on the toilet peeing while having a full blown conversation with each other.
19. No matter what got broken, thrown up on, stolen, no matter who said what or who went home with whoever else - we ALWAYS call each other the next day.
20. We always wake up with that strange guilt feeling and CANT remember why!!
------------------Girls-----------------
-------------are like apples----------------
----------on trees. The best ones----------
--------are at the top of the tree.--------
-------The boys dont want to reach------
------for the good ones because they ------
---are afraid of falling and getting hurt.----
-Instead, they just get the rotten apples-
--from the ground that aren't as good, --
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
--reality, they're amazing. They just----
---have to wait for the right boy to-------
----- come along, the one who's-----------
----------- brave enough to-----------------
-----------------climb all----------------------
----------------- the way---------------------
-----------------to the top--------------------
---------------- of the tree.------------------