Brandon Bluth - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Wow folks. It's been a long time since I've updated this Myspace thing. When I was younger, and less mature, this site used to be way neato and offer cool stuff. Now, I could care less about it. It's lost all its fun. Oh my. The good ole days. Remember when I used to stalk people on here to internet's end? I mean, I still do. That's what myspace is for, right? I'm just saying that my methods have changed. See, I used to sit at home on my couch on Friday nights while perversing pages and drinking orange soda, but then i bought myself a van about a year ago, and now I can go out and steal wi-fi to stalk people. It makes me feel less pathetic to know that I'm out of the house while being degenerate, and the new van really enhances my stalker persona. Sometimes I even get a little drive through value meal before a few hours of online laptop wireless van stalking. It's great. The only tricky thing is finding strong free bandwidth. I have a few good spots, but I'd rather not share because I don't want you going there then stalking me. I can feel you undressing me with your mind now. Perv-face. Still, at least myspace is good for something.

My Blog

I’m back baby!

1. What is a question that people always ask you?If it's 11 inches, where do you keep it?2. What is the 6th text in your inbox?"stop texting me, for the love of God, stop!" but that is out of contex...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Tue, 11 Dec 2007 10:55:00 PST

I'm a MANIAC!!!!

Two blogs in two days...here ya go !!!1. Do you like Chinese food? I set myself on fire once, just to feel the burn.2. How big is your bed? when i cook chicken flavored top ramen, I always add a slice...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Sun, 24 Dec 2006 02:28:00 PST

I filed suit

Last week when I was down at the market buying 12 pounds of mutton, bullion cubes, and 8 cans of miracle whip, i spotted something out of peripheral vision. It was a romance novel in paperback form. ...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Sat, 23 Dec 2006 01:20:00 PST

i found the girl of my dreams.

hello fellow bloggers and bloggerettes,can i offer you some bloggerest gum? No? anyways, i've been on myspace for a few years now...i know i know....your mom has been on myspace for a years now. wh...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Tue, 01 Aug 2006 05:22:00 PST

FORZA ITALIA

hello fellow bloggers,as you were maybe aware, the world cup finale was today. By a stroke of chance, genius, and good looks, i single handedly lead italy to victory over france. as you know i was in ...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Sun, 09 Jul 2006 02:35:00 PST

Drug-Fueled Sex Crimes

So, Today I saw a TV program where George Clooney, fresh off his trip to the Sudan, was promoting awareness about the atrocities in Darfur. And that got me thinking about Drug-fueled sex crimes. When ...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Wed, 17 May 2006 01:41:00 PST

Finger F*&king ROCKS!!!!

HAHA! yes, graffic! i know. But it got you into my blog! my views have been down lately folks, and still, after all these years, i only have 11 kudos, 3 of which i probab...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Tue, 14 Mar 2006 05:48:00 PST

Plenis heads who don't get back to you

I can't take it anymore people! You're driving me nuts! Every single one of you. I just don't f*ing get it. Why do you have to go all Brokeback on me all the time? I'm n...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Wed, 08 Mar 2006 08:55:00 PST

I'm a Fun Factory!

Good news fellow Floggers! I have officially hit the 4 mark for the number of people who subscribe to my blogs! This is indeed a glorious day. I have had 611 total views, and 10 kudo...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Mon, 13 Feb 2006 10:52:00 PST

you're probably an ass. here is why?

You have a cell phone. You don't answer it when people call you. Then you wait for 2-5 hours to call them back. You're a f*&king piece of sh*t. quit screening your calls.&n...
Posted by Brandon Bluth on Mon, 02 Jan 2006 06:44:00 PST