Wolfe Like Me profile picture

Wolfe Like Me

Bring me my gun of itching desire. Bring me my bullets and I will fire.

About Me

My name is Brandon. I know more useless "Seinfeld" trivia than any mammal in North America. Do not pretend as though this fact does not impress you. Ask me anything and, without Googling, I will marvel you with the correct answer. Be as obscure as you like, it won't make a difference.

Also, I'm allergic to figs.

My Interests

Championing black jelly beans in a world that shuns them.

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I'd like to meet:


Music:

• Depeche Mode
• The Rolling Stones
• Weezer (Note: Does not include "Make Believe")
• Tenacious D
• The Cure
• Deftones
• Cat Stevens
• Stone Temple Pilots
• System of a Down
• Placebo
• The New Pornographers
• DeVotchKa
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Movies:

• Ghostbusters
• Back To The Future
• Back To The Future Part II
• Back To The Future Part III
• Die Hard
• Die Hard 2: Die Harder
• Die Hard With A Vengeance
• Live Free or Die Hard
• Lethal Weapon
• Lethal Weapon 2
• Lethal Weapon 3
• Lethal Weapon 4
• The Big Lebowski
• Rushmore
• The Royal Tenenbaums
• Pulp Fiction
• From Dusk Till Dawn
• Halloween
• Punch-Drunk Love
• Groundhog Day
• South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut
• Serenity
• Borat: Cultural Learnings of America For Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
• The 40-Year-Old Virgin
• Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
• Superbad
• Clerks
• Mallrats
• Chasing Amy
• Escape From New York
• Escape From L.A.
• X-Men
• X2: X-Men United
• Batman
• Batman Returns
• Batman Begins
• The X-Files: Fight The Future
• The Fugitive
• Seven
• Zodiac
• Beverly Hills Cop
• Grosse Pointe Blank
• Get Shorty
• Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
• Dumb and Dumber
• The Adventures of Ford Fairlane
• American Psycho
• The Prestige
• Sin City
• Goodfellas
• No Country For Old Men
• Before Sunrise
• Before Sunset
• Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
• Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (I prefer it to Raiders. What?)
And, of course...
• THE ROOM
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Television:

• Buffy The Vampire Slayer
• Angel
• The Sopranos
• The X-Files (The first five seasons only; the last four make Jesus weep)
• Lost
• 24
• Seinfeld
• Curb Your Enthusiasm
• Sledge Hammer!
• Married... With Children
• The Shield
• Firefly
• Veronica Mars
• Twin Peaks
• South Park
• Da Ali G Show
• The Office (UK)
• The Office (US)
• Everybody Loves Raymond
• Futurama
• The Simpsons
• NewsRadio
• Cheers

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Books:

"Larry David's Guide to Getting In That Ass" by Leon Black (dramatization below)

My Blog

Back by popular (?) demand: Screening II of the Cult Masterpiece THE ROOM

Hosted By:"Movies on a Big Screen" (and Shaun Esfandiary & Brandon Wolfe)When:Saturday Jan. 19, 2007at 10:00 PMWhere::"Big Gray Building"600 4th St.- corner of 4th & F by the Pyramid BldgWest ...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Tue, 08 Jan 2008 08:24:00 PST

Allow me to take this opportunity to be a huge nerd

Fox sets date for 'X-Files' sequelScully, Mulder return to theaters on July 25By PAMELA MCCLINTOCK, PAMELA MCCLINTOCK, TATIANA SIEGELThe long-awaited second "X-Files" film is finally a go, w...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Thu, 01 Nov 2007 07:57:00 PST

I have a new job.

Tuesday sees me returning to the workforce after a prolonged absence. My reaction to this development is bittersweet. While I'll miss being a figurative bum, another couple of months and I might well ...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Mon, 17 Sep 2007 01:55:00 PST

I'm a writer. I write. It's what I do, it's what I AM.

I could have mentioned this before now, but I've been working as a writer for the Features section of The State Hornet this semester. I have several articles up now that you can read if you have time ...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Mon, 19 Mar 2007 12:57:00 PST

Don't see SAW III.

***If you don't want to know anything that happens in this terrible movie, read no further***   I didn't much like Saw, but I'll give it points for having a relatively innovative plot structure. ...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Sat, 28 Oct 2006 08:07:00 PST

I used to just be half Greek. But today, I am half GREEK GOD.

Thanks to our new roommate's addition of a scale to our bathroom, I've just learned that I have lost a whopping 22 lbs. since the start of the year. I'm so damn pleased with myself right now, you just...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Fri, 13 Oct 2006 11:45:00 PST

LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD on June 27, 2007.

Yeah, the director is a joke and the premise is iffy at best (though I kind of like the goofy title), but it's a new Die Hard movie. The first since I was a junior in high school. Anyon...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Thu, 03 Aug 2006 02:41:00 PST

So it seems I'm a healer.

Here's an interesting (?) fact about myself: For the past ten years, I've noticed that streetlights frequently go off as I pass them, either while driving or walking. Not every time, but I'd...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Fri, 13 Jan 2006 11:10:00 PST

Tae Kwon Do.

I took a Tae Kwon Do class earlier this summer to meet my school's nonsensically mandatory PE requirement. I learned today that I received an A in said class. I don't understand how such a t...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Tue, 16 Aug 2005 10:37:00 PST

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

I saw it last night, and I watched Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory for the first time on Sunday night (well, I technically saw it in fifth grade, but could recall nothing other than the chick tu...
Posted by Wolfe Like Me on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST