Satan

I'm really not a bad guy. God just had those fuckers write some mean stuff about me in that book. Plus, my reputation is nothing compared to God's anyway. I mean, he has Bush and the majority of America killing tons of people in his name. I get a lousy Dahmer or Manson every once in a while. It's not fair. Why can't these wars be in my name? Does God really like killing people more than me?