Dirty Pirate Hooker - ProfilesArchive

About Me

How does one describe oneself in words that will convey any type of feeling whatsoever? There. I've lost you already. It's okay. I'll be gentle.Strange as it seems I never ever ever ever know how to write out these damn things because how the hell are you supposed to describe yourself? Do I sell myself like you're trading pelts for my friendship or do I just explain how I feel about myself and subconsciously describe how I am without even really writing it? Shit. I've lost you again. Damn I'm bad at this. Well, no, maybe not.Maybe by describing what I think about myself you'll decide to be my "friend" or not, but really I find that I'm someone you have to converse with just to really figure me out, just like anybody. Me tellin you about myself would include the following stats:I live in a small town in NJ and it sucks but it's reality so there. I write, I read a lot, I go to work, I drink, I smoke , and I'm up for anything you can convince me is a good idea. I'm easily swayed and gullible, but fairly intelligent and know outrageous facts about pointless things like Elephants not being able to jump, having four knees and how bumblebees cannot technically fly yet do (their wings are too small to facilitate flight yet they still buzz around your head in the summer and make you twitch your face as if it was on a swivel just so it doesn't land on your nose and swell it to the size of Michigan). But Anyway, yeah. Here's me. Make of it what you will.

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My Interests

Writing, film, I admire music and music makers, mind expanding people, mind expanding situations.

I'd like to meet:

Natalie Portman, Samuel L. Jackson, Clint Eastwood, many more I'll think of later

Get Your Cyborg Name

Cyborg Name was ripped off of Sean's profile, because he's right, it is awesome. -
Create your own Friend Quiz here

Music:

Blues, Jazz, Rock, Punk, "classic Rock", Metal (some), Rap (some), R&B (some). I don't usually like Country, not because I'm a trendwhore, just because I don't like listening to it. It makes my ears bleed. By The Way, This is Ween playing "Final Alarm". It's fucking great.

I'll give anything a shot.

Movies:

The Big Lebowski, Se7en, Donnie Darko, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Goodfellas, Monty Pythons Quest for the holy Grail, Fight Club, Little Miss Sunshine, The Departed, The Descent(uk), Pan's Labyrinth, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, Clerks, Clerks 2, The Treasure of Sierra Madre, Stranger Than Fiction, Comic Book Movies (nearly all), Reservoir Dogs, etc.

Television:

The Daily Show, The Venture Brothers, Colbert Report, Rome

Books:

Steven King(The Shining, Misery, etc), Hunter S. Thompson (Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Hell's Angels, etc), Franz Kafka (Metamorphosis, The Trial), Jack London (To build a Fire, Call of the Wild), William Golding (Lord of The Flies), Charles Dickens(Oliver Twist, A Christmas Carol), John Grisham (The Testament, A Painted House, etc), Ken Kesey (One Flew Over THe Cuckoo's Nest), Kurt Vonnegut (Slaughterhouse Five), Anthony Burgess (A Clockwork Orange), Neil Gaiman (Neverwhere, American Gods, Anansi Boys, etc), Bill Watterson (Calvin & Hobbes), Gary Larson (The Far Side), J.K. Rowling (Harry Potter)

Heroes:

Waffles.

My Blog

The Lure of Cigarettes and alcohol

I'm listening to "Vehicle" by The Ides of March, and I'm gonna have to be honest, the lyrics are a little weird. "I'm a friendly stranger in a black sedan, why don't you hop inside my car?" Uhh, may...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Fri, 08 Jun 2007 05:30:00 PST

(---------------------÷--------------------)

Every year the sun breaks through and warms the Earth and I stand outside with my arms outstretched and soak in the beauty of the grass, the trees, the azure sky that allows fascinating cloud sculptur...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Tue, 24 Apr 2007 07:33:00 PST

Fiddle-dee-dee, said Scarlett.

I am stupid. I have reached a level of stupidity only gawked and pointed at by unwitting members of the Republican Party. I have the world screeching down on my shoulders, threatening to w...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Sat, 14 Apr 2007 08:25:00 PST

Razor

Something clicked on my way out of work the other day and I wrote this. It's confusing but I like it in that "crazy persons inner thoughts" kinda way. Writing like that makes me feel like ...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Sat, 07 Apr 2007 07:38:00 PST

Do yourself a favor

Ohh, Leonidas you crazy fucking bastard, you took those 300 men down with you in the greatest, manliest fucking flick ever to grace the silver fucking screen. All hail to king Frank Miller, may ...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Mon, 12 Mar 2007 02:46:00 PST

Zodiac and I (set some time aside, this one is long)

[There are Matrix and The Departed spoilers in this blog. Don't read it if it offends you.]Apparently, my taste in film is either not that great or way too sophisticated for everyone. Wait...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Thu, 08 Mar 2007 11:48:00 PST

A Style Tip from The Press

It has come to my attention that hooded sweatshirts (hoodies) are now en vogue and have been popularized from their apparent seedy past. Thank You Press of Atlantic City. ...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Sun, 18 Feb 2007 08:07:00 PST

appy-polly-loggies.

I have yet to figure out what it's all about, but damn it, I'm trying. That's more than some of those button-nosed cheapskates that don't try! That's more than one could say for those malo...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Wed, 07 Feb 2007 08:02:00 PST

Nonsense

I have grown, cultivated really, a cold sore right at the part where my lips come together. Isn't that great? I feel like I just won the winter disease lottery for like two dollars. ...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Sun, 14 Jan 2007 08:27:00 PST

Saturday.

I have writers block and it's destroying my soul. I have no time for my friends (who are actually dear to me) I have no time for work, school, business or pleasure. It's not that I'm bored...
Posted by Dirty Pirate Hooker on Mon, 08 Jan 2007 10:00:00 PST