Well, shucks, I'm flattered you ask. First thing to know - I'm funny. At least I think I am. And I don't care if you think I'm not. I like jokes -- they don't necessarily have to be good. (Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD!! What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?) JAWS is the best movie ever made.Shark Surfer
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I delivered pizzas for 5 years in Las Vegas - I could tell you stories that you quite honestly wouldn't believe. Then I worked for a corporate pawn shop as a warehouse manager and was very bored, mostly because no one ever took me hostage when I was transporting used goods between stores, never mind the fact my truck had pictures or really expensive jewelry on it. What I really want to do is get paid for writing. I write already. All I need to do now is get a paycheck! I like action, suspense, adventure... and comedy. I once wrote a short story called "Hank The Suicidal Pigeon." One of my best, I think. But there's also a short script called "A Fool Called Jesus," about a man who wanted to reenact the crucifixion (and ordered a full menu from McDonald's for the Last Supper) but then told everyone to quit fooling around and go home when they actually got the crucifying part. I see myself writing screenplays, but I like to dabble in prose. I also enjoy the occasional drink. Okay, so, sometimes, it's more than occassional... Am I drinking as I write this? What the hell do you think? Okay, I could go on and on. What else do you really want to know, though? Just ask me, dammit!
You Are a Powdered Devil's Food Donut
A total sweetheart on the outside, you love to fool people with your innocent image.
On the inside you're a little darker, richer, and more complex.
You're a hedonist who demands more than one pleasure at a time.
Decadent and daring, you test the limits of human indulgence.
What Donut Are You?
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You Have A Type A- Personality
A-
You are one of the most balanced people around
Motivated and focused, you are good at getting what you want
You rule at success, but success doesn't rule you.When it's playtime, you really know how to kick back
Whether it's hanging out with friends or doing something you love!
You live life to the fullest - encorporating the best of both worlds
Do You Have a Type A Personality?
Your Quirk Factor: 69%
You're so quirky, it's hard for you to tell the difference between quirky and normal.
No doubt about it, there's little about you that's "normal" or "average."
How Quirky Are You?
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Taco Bill
Birthday: 4-6-75
Birthplace: Vegas
Current Location: No Ho, Ca
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Brown
Height: 5'12"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right
Your Heritage: Hispanic on my mom's said/European mutt on my dad's side
The Shoes You Wore Today: Old white tennis shoes
Your Weakness: Booze and naked women...
Your Fears: Wasps. Bees. That's it.
Your Perfect Pizza: Plain cheese. Or everything. Nothing in between.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Sell something I've written, dammit!
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: WASSUP!!!! Ha, just kidding.
Thoughts First Waking Up: Ugh!
Your Best Physical Feature: My smile. :-)
Your Bedtime: Sometime in the morning.
Your Most Missed Memory: Summertimes by the pool, listening to Huey Lewis and the News "Sports" when my parents were still married and everyone would come over.
Pepsi or Coke: Coke with McDonalds, Pepsi with Taco Bell. Which ever.
McDonalds or Burger King: Coke with both.
Single or Group Dates: What's a date? Not sure I remember...
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Sun tea, dammit!
Chocolate or Vanilla: There are times for both.
Cappuccino or Coffee: I work at a coffee shop; depends on my mood.
Do you Smoke: Not really.
Do you Swear: God dammit, this is a stupid question!
Do you Sing: Well, most people don't call what I do singing...
Do you Shower Daily: Mostly.
Have you Been in Love: Yeah.
Do you want to go to College: Already been.
Do you want to get Married: Someday.
Do you belive in yourself: Yeah.
Do you get Motion Sickness: No.
Do you think you are Attractive: I don't think I'm that bad looking! :-)
Are you a Health Freak: No, but I should eat better.
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Hell yeah!
Do you play an Instrument: I'm writer -- is my keyboard an instrument.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Hell, yes, fool!
In the past month have you Smoked: Not so much.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Not really.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Not really.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: I work at one.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No, and I'm so much the worse for it.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: No, and I'm so much the worse for it.
In the past month have you been on Stage: I don't think I've sung karaoke this month...
In the past month have you been Dumped: Naw.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: No, and I'm so much the worse for it!
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Probably.
Ever been Drunk: Oh, yeah.
Ever been called a Tease: Not in those words.
Ever been Beaten up: Yeah, but maybe I earned it.
Ever Shoplifted: Yeah.
How do you want to Die: Bitten by a shark!
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: I'll let you know when I grow up!
What country would you most like to Visit: China, Ireland, Australia, New Zealand, Japan... all over, dammit!
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Blue - light eyes.
Favourite Hair Color: Blonde. Dirty brown.
Short or Long Hair: Longer.
Height: I like the longer legs so maybe taller...
Weight: Not a stick figure! I like curves!!
Best Clothing Style: Whatever is comfortable.
Number of Drugs I have taken: Not so many...
Number of CDs I own: Does it matter?
Number of Piercings: Doesn't matter.
Number of Tattoos: Not so much.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: We all have these things.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
You Are Beer!
You don't need to get totally wasted when you hit the bars.
More of a social drinker, you just like to have fun with your friends.
And as long as the beer keeps flowing, you're a happy camper.
But don't mix things up: "Beer Before Liquor, Never Been Sicker!"
What alcoholic drink are you?
You Are Guinness
You know beer well, and you'll only drink the best beers in the world.
Watered down beers disgust you, as do the people who drink them.
When you drink, you tend to become a bit of a know it all - especially about subjects you don't know well.
But your friends tolerate your drunken ways, because you introduce them to the best beers around.
What's Your Beer Personality?
You Were Actually Born Under:
Delicate, timid, and attractive - sometimes you really do act like a bunny.
You're very compassionate and protective of those you love, sometimes too protective.
Your home is really your castle, and you make sure your home is comfortable and well furnished.
You don&..39;t like to argue - and you prefer a quiet, peaceful life.You are most compatible with a Goat or a Pig.
You Should Have Been Born Under:
You are totally loyal, faithful, and honest.
However, you don't trust others to be as ethical as you are!
Straight forward and direct, you really aren't one for small talk.
You are a great listener - and an agreeable companion when you're in a good mood!You are most compatible with a Tiger or Horse.
What Year Were You Born Under?
Your Inner Child Is Happy
You see life as simple, and simple is a very good thing.
You're cheerful and upbeat, taking everything as it comes.
And you decide not to worry, even when things look bad.
You figure there's just so many great things to look forward to.
How Is Your Inner Child?
You Are a Dirty Martini
You are a sexy, sometimes belligerent, over the top drunk.
You tend to get in a lot of trouble. When you drink, there are no rules.
You should never: Drink in the company of strangers. Seriously.
Your ideal party: Is so good you black out in the middle of it.
Your drinking soulmates: Those with a Margarita Martini personality.
Your drinking rivals: Those with an Orange Martini personality
What Flavor Martini Are You?
You Are an Irish Coffee
At your best, you are: wild, spontaneous, and outgoing
At your worst, you are: too extreme and reckless
You drink coffee when: you want to keep drinking booze
Your caffeine addiction level: low
What Kind of Coffee Are You?
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