If Sharks Were Land Mammals

About Me

BIO

i am 17 years of age. i live in a small village full of the elderly. i have a family consisting of two older brothers, a mother, and a father. i no longer go to boarding school which means that the cane hasn't touched my glutes for a while now. i am the king of everything and thankfully i have a beautiful queen to share it all with.

this is all hypothetical because i'm pretty sure that sharks won't be land mammals any time soon

CONTACT

[email protected]

send me comments of the solution to the hypothetical question. i will put good ones up in a hall of fame. im being selective:

- if sharks were land mammals, i'd swim

- if sharks were land mammals, jaws would be far less subtle

- if sharks were land mammals, i'd eat my hat

- if sharks were land mammals, they'd be factory farmed and then sold in tescos

- if sharks were land mammals, people would flee to the sea

- if sharks were land mammals, they'd wear:

MERCHANDISE

THE EXPLORER: Â£3.00 +p&p

PARTNERS IN CRIME

I Was A Cub Scout Late of the Pier Data.Select.Party The Runners Dream/Sequence The Whip New Town Pioneers Friendly Fires Ivy Sins We Smoke Fags Team Waterpolo Eskimo Disco

LINKS

My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 3/23/2006
Band Website: this one
Band Members:

alexander pilgrim:

all music

all lyrics

all things bright and beautiful

yamaha psr-1500, yamaha pss-570, fender telecaster, angel glockenspiel, zoom mrt-3 rhythm machine, squier stratocaster, squier p-bass, cruiser semi-acoustic, maracas, pearl drums, mahalo ukelele

Influences:

the most immense bands:

brand new, the maccabees, bright eyes, interpol, the maple state, dartz!, i was a cub scout, at the drive-in, the bled, radiohead, blink 182, pretty girls make graves, thursday, moneen, tokyo police club, jimmy eat world, larrikin love, playradioplay!, cursive, data.select.party, taking back sunday, linda's nephew, death cab for cutie, the postal service, the smiths, mae, the cure, weezer, willy mason, foals, arcade fire, alexisonfire, underoath

Sounds Like: this guy treats his music like a theory on the universe - the strange place clubi havn't got a clue what's going on in his mind while he's on stage, but it's something special, something that 'they' should make a film about - arthur santosperfect songs for a sunday night! - new sound promotionsbish bash bosh - andy kadwilliswlm is like a sexy william shatner. i'd like him naked on a sunday - fancy a lol?this is the best industrial metal i've heard in yonks,move over rammstein, make room for the new kid on the block - jonathan wedge

Record Label: an imaginary one

My Blog

NEW SONG: Zzzzz

dear friendsi have just recorded a rough version of a new song called "Zzzzz" (but you say it like Five Zeds). it really is a terrible recording with too many effects on the guitar, rubbishly recorded...
Posted by If Sharks Were Land Mammals on Fri, 20 Jun 2008 07:33:00 PST

news

hello world.so i thought i'd let anyone who wants to know what is going on in the If Sharks Were Land Mammals worldi am in the process of revising for my A levels and taking exams and the like. so no ...
Posted by If Sharks Were Land Mammals on Sun, 04 May 2008 03:24:00 PST

THE EXPLORER LYRICS

dear all.here lie the lyrics the new EP whose appearance is imminent.it is now named "THE EXPLORER"The Spectaclewelcome to the show, im ace ventura she's dan marinoand we are such a perfect pairyet so...
Posted by If Sharks Were Land Mammals on Wed, 13 Feb 2008 02:07:00 PST

The Aztec EP

Dear Readers,Soon the world will have to embrace a new power, the power of:SHAPOWWWWWWWWWWW"THE AZTEC EP" which is an EP i am currently with a nice boy named Lewis Mortimer who isnt really a boy.it wi...
Posted by If Sharks Were Land Mammals on Sun, 21 Oct 2007 10:50:00 PST

Autobiography

To the masses,It has come to my attention that explanations are needed.First off alexander got an acoustic guitar for Christmas of 2005, and then Brightspark was born. He dabbled about with his acoust...
Posted by If Sharks Were Land Mammals on Sun, 13 May 2007 07:22:00 PST