Iron Saints

THOMASELLI AND THOMASELLI 2008STATE OF THE SAL ADDRESS #1: "As your President elect, Sal Thomaselli will make it his duty to serve the great people of the United States of America the way that he believes this country should be run. No longer will this country be dominated by a man that is hated by a majority of the population! No longer will the power be in the hands of the greedy motherfuckers making millions in the oil business! The great citizens of America, and even all of you illegal aliens that do all the jobs that the rest of us don't want to do, shall no longer be embarrassed by a lying, uneducated, and corrupt President anymore! The time for change is now! Fuck Republicans, Fuck Democrats, the Thomaselli's have decided to form their own party. They will be officially representing the Green Party. Sal is promising the American public that his first order of business, as your President elect, will be to legalize marijuana. Sal is an individual who is known for his honest, and respectful approach. For example, during his incredibly successful, and highly lucrative wrestling career, alongside his Chief of Staff/Press Secretary and brother, Vito Thomaselli, Sal was known for winning his matches fair and square, with absolutely no outside interference, or the use of any kind of foreign objects. He is a man that is of the people, by the people and for the people. In conclusion, a vote for the Thomaselli's, is a vote for you." CHIEF OF STAFF/PRESS SECRETARY "Captain Profanity" Vito Thomaselli