"Here I come to save the day-Captain Skidmark is on the way..." |
With Election Day approaching, some local politicians are beating the illegal immigrants issue into the ground. My only problem with it is that instead of referring to the immigrants as either "illega...
Posted by Brian on Wed, 17 Oct 2007 05:28:00 PST |
Living life 1 Dirty Sanchez at a time |
Isaih Thomas was quoted as saying that black men can call black women "bitches", but it would be racist if a white man called a black woman a "bitch". Well here's to hoping that Isaih becomes cellmate...
Posted by Brian on Sun, 30 Sep 2007 10:51:00 PST |
Hating life-and loving every minute of it |
My last sexual encounter was awkward, to say the least. For starters, when she stuck her hand down my jeans to rub on Mr. Happy she seemed disgusted when she felt the numerous wet spots on my boxers f...
Posted by Brian on Thu, 26 Jul 2007 09:55:00 PST |
Controversy surrounds me-and I love it |
I wonder if Michael Vick's cellphone ringtone is "How Much Is That Doggy In The Window?"?As much as it sickens me, America has become addicted to game shows and reality TV. Since this is the case it g...
Posted by Brian on Sun, 08 Jul 2007 10:33:00 PST |
I don't get out very often-and that's a good thing |
Some things I do to piss people off: If I go to a store and I see 3 empty parking spaces in a row I park in the middle one to make the other 2 spaces a pain in the arse to park in. Notice my use of ol...
Posted by Brian on Sun, 20 May 2007 07:51:00 PST |
I'm drunk typing, but this is the honest to God truth |
A fellow co-worker told me that the going rate for tattoo removal is $1600 per square inch. It's a good thing I don't have my penis tattooed-I'd be out $800 bucks.I have come to realize that I am noth...
Posted by Brian on Sun, 06 May 2007 01:42:00 PST |
The circumsion decision |
Just about everybody who knows me considers me to be disgusting-and that's when they're being nice. But, believe it or not, I do have some dignity. Like when I pick a scab and eat it. I'm always afrai...
Posted by Brian on Tue, 03 Apr 2007 09:06:00 PST |
Deathwish- A short story |
She must have had a deathwish. That is why I loved her. Honestly, I'm not an attractive man. Matter of fact, I'm damn near repulsive. Don't get me wrong-she wasn't drop dead gorgeous-but ...
Posted by Brian on Wed, 07 Mar 2007 01:09:00 PST |
"I miss my donkey" |
Iguanas have 2 peckers(no shit). If an iguana experienced Erectile Dysfunction in both and popped 2 Viagras, could he possibly experience a 8 hour hard-on? If so, could he possibly survive? At least h...
Posted by Brian on Mon, 19 Feb 2007 09:38:00 PST |
If I lived life in the present it would still suck |
Turn away if you're easily offended: Earlier I said that I use 3 tissues when I pound the ole' pud. Just to clarify: the first tissue is used to wipe off my hands; the second one is used to wipe down ...
Posted by Brian on Thu, 25 Jan 2007 04:27:00 PST |
