Woeg aka Bastiano profile picture

Woeg aka Bastiano

Bastiano and the Army of Markness!

About Me

I have always disliked filling out "about me" pages. It seems to me that such things people say about themselves always end up sounding either like bragging, pretention, subtle deceptions, or outright lying bullshit. So we'll combine the lot of them, and run with it.
My name is Mark, though there are people I have known for years who still don't know that's my name. I'm old, slow, and fat, but at least I have a wicked sense of cynicism. I'm happily married to an incredibly gorgeous woman (no really, she is HAWT!!!), the father of two fantastic little boys, and I am probably one of the most eclectic people I have ever met. My other personalities agree with me entirely. I'm also a professional graphic layout designer and documentation coordinator, whatever the hell that means
I really am odd, though. At times, I truly am wickedly evil. I have a dark side and anger management issues that have lead to more than their share of problems in my life. At the same time, I have an undying belief in chivalry, honor, and in doing that which is right...a belief that, in many ways, keeps my darker impulses in check.
I love music of pretty much every style and genre. I have wildly changing moods and tastes, and may listen to some Gravediggaz and follow it up with Pat Boone. I love dirty vodka martinis, karaoke, beating people with sticks, and dressing up in old boiler plate. I like black. A lot.
I dislike definitions, I dislike authority, I dislike people who think they know more than they do or who think only of themselves and never of others.
I am an intensely passionate beast, and given to flirtation and fancy, though I am resolutely bound and happy with my darling Raina. In other words, I may say you're beautiful, attractive, and desirable...and I will mean it entirely and with all my heart...but that doesn't mean I want to run away with you. I am, and I repeat, *happy*, and will remain so for the rest of my days. That doesn't mean I can't acknowledge the beauty I see in others, or appreciate it...it just means that it will go no further.
That said, I think I have covered all my blustering and pretentious needs. Thanks for reading!Your results:
You are Wash (Ship Pilot) Wash (Ship Pilot) 85% Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command) 65% Malcolm Reynolds (Captain) 55% River (Stowaway) 55% Alliance 55% Derrial Book (Shepherd) 40% Jayne Cobb (Mercenary) 35% A Reaver (Cannibal) 35% Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic) 35% Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic) 30% Inara Serra (Companion) 20% You are a pilot with a good
if not silly sense of humor.
You take pride in your collection of toys.
You love your significant other.
Click here to take the Serenity Personality Quiz

My Interests

SCA, RPGs, friends, reading, books, armour, fighting, music, art, poetry, writing, movies, pop culture, zombies, horror, scifi, debates, arguing, flirting, chivalry, and above all else, my family.

I'd like to meet:

Friends, enemies, those who share my interests and those who oppose them. Oddballs, freaks, weirdos, and nutcases are all pretty much right up my alley. Poets, writers, artists, musicians too. Oh wait, did I just repeat myself? Most of all, I'd like to meet the punkass 15 year old kid who already grabbed my name on here, and *convince* him to sign his account over to me. ;)

Music:

2nu, A Flock of Seagulls, AC/DC, Aerosmith, AFI, Alice Cooper, Alien Ant Farm, Alien Sex Fiend, The Animals, Apocalyptica, Apollo 13, Ataraxia, The B-52’s, Bad Religion, Bauhaus, The Beastie Boys, The Beatles, Bel Canto, Bif Naked, Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, Big Electric Cat, Billy Idol, Billy Joel, Bjork, Black Tape for a Blue Girl, Blackmore’s Night, The Bloodhound Gang, Blondie, Blue October, Blue Oyster Cult, Bob Marley, Bon Jovi, Bond, Bree Sharp, Brian Setzer, Cab Calloway, Cake, The Cardigans, The Cranes, The Creatures, Cherry Poppin’ Daddies, Chris Isaak, Clan of Xymox, The Clash, Concrete Blonde, The Cure, Cyndi Lauper, Cypress Hill, Danny Elfman, David Bowie, Dead Can Dance, Dead Kennedys, Dead Milkmen, Dean Martin, Def Leppard, Deftones, Delerium, Depeche Mode, Devil Doll, Devo, Dire Straits, Disturbed, The Doors, Dreadful Shadows, Dropkick Murphys, Duran Duran, Electric Hellfire Club, Emiliana Torrini, Eminem, Enigma, Enya, Eric Clapton, Eurythmics, Evanesence, Faith and the Muse, Faith No More, Fall Out Boy, Flyleaf, Foreigner, Frank Sinatra, Front 242, Front Line Assembly, Fuel, Garbage, Gary Numan, Glen Miller, Glenn Danzig, Gnarles Barkley, Gorillaz, Gravediggaz, Green Day, Guns and Roses, Heather Alexander, Hoobastank, House of Pain, Huey Lewis and the News, Information Society, ICP, INXS, Iron Maiden, Jill Tracy, Jimi Hendrix, Jimmy Buffet, Joan Jett, Johnny Cash, Johnny Horton, Kathy Mar, Ken Theriot, Kim Wilde, King Missile, Kiss, KMFDM, Korn, L7, Lacuna Coil, Led Zeppelin, Lenny Kravitz, Leonard Cohen, Leslie Fish, Linkin Park, Lisa Theriot, Liz Phair, Lords of Acid, Loreena McKennitt, Louis Armstrong, Madness, Madonna, Marc Gunn, Marilyn Manson, Martin Gore, Marty Robbins, Meat Beat Manifesto, Meat Loaf, Mediaeval Baebes, Megaherz, Men At Work, Metallica, Midnight Oil, Midnight Syndicate, Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Ministry, Minstrels of Mayhem, The Misfits, Mojo Nixon, Monster Magnet, The Moody Blues, Motley Crue, My Chemical Romance, Nat King Cole, Nickel Creek, Nine Inch Nails, Nirvana, No Doubt, NOFX, Offspring, Oingo Boingo, Ophelia Burning, Outkast, Ozzy Osbourne, P.O.D., Panic! At the Disco, Pantera, Papa Roach, Pat Godwin, Peter Gabriel, Phil Collins, Pink, Pink Floyd, Poison, Portishead, Primus, Prince, Prodigy, Queen, Queens of the Stone Age, REM, Rage Against the Machine, Rammstein, The Ramones, Rancid, Rasputina, Razed in Black, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Richard Cheese, Rob Zombie, The Rolling Stones, Rush, The Scorpions, Seven Nations, The Sex Pistols, Shakira, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Sisters of Mercy, Skinny Puppy, Snake River Conspiracy, Splashdown, Squirrel Nut Zippers, The Stranglers, The Strokes, The Stray Cats, Sublime, Suzanne Vega, Switchblade Symphony, System of a Down, Tears for Fears, Tenacious D, They Might Be Giants, This Mortal Coil, Thomas Bordeaux, Tom Petty, Tool, Toto, Trans-Siberian Orchestra, Type O Negative, U2, Van Halen, Violent Femmes, VNV Nation, Voltaire, Wall of Voodoo, Weird Al Yankovic, The White Stripes, White Zombie, ZZ Top

Movies:

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, the Star Wars Trilogy (there are no prequals), the Indiana Jones Trilogy, the Living Dead series by Romero, Return of the Living Dead I&II, the Evil Dead trilogy, horror, scifi, fantasy, drama, comedy, action...I love them all!

Television:

Mythbusters, Survivor (yeah, yeah, I know), the Fairly Oddparents, Firefly

Books:

Anything by Roger Zelazny, some Stephen King, and really, anything that catches my fancy.

Heroes:

Ramon Lull, William Marshal, Richard Raefen, Joseph Baron, Lord Byron, Edgar Allen Poe

My Blog

Zombie Haiku

Dead people walking,Obsessed with grayer matter -They find no feast here.See the living dead,They are here because there isNo more room in hell.No scent is left butThe smell of rotting corpses;And the...
Posted by Woeg aka Bastiano on Thu, 27 Sep 2007 12:43:00 PST

To Be a Knight

To Be a KnightA sonnet redoublé in the style ofWilliam Shakespeare by Lord Bastiano Francisco de Valencia commonly known asMark Baron 4/24/2007 THE QUESTIONWhen asked why I would want ...
Posted by Woeg aka Bastiano on Wed, 25 Apr 2007 11:01:00 PST

Which Greek God Are You?

                                    ?? Which Of The Greek Gods Ar...
Posted by Woeg aka Bastiano on Wed, 15 Nov 2006 05:28:00 PST

Think Fast!

Think Fast Survey- answer with the first thing that pops into your head DONT CHEAT!!!1. My ex is still..... my ex.2. I am listening to..... the rain falling on the pavement outside.3. Maybe I should.....
Posted by Woeg aka Bastiano on Wed, 13 Sep 2006 02:10:00 PST