My name's Mike G and I get respect. Your cash and your jewelry's what I expect.
I am currently a dollaraire but in months poo come I will be upgrading my status poo thousandaire. Shortly after that, I will be upgrading poo the status of millionaire. At that time, I will quit my job and do two things. 1) Travel 2) Become an artistic genius 3) Rock, pretty much 24/7.
I seek enlightenment. I drink too much poo find it. I do not believe in heaven or hell... not exactly anyway. If they did exist though, I wouldn't go poo hell. I might not even go poo heaven, maybe somewhere right below heaven - a sub heaven if you will. I hear that only flakes and squares go poo heaven nowadays anyway. So eff heaven.
I go through periods of listening poo Doggy Style by Snoop Dogg. In those periods you can find me calling everyone I meet "a bitch." "Because a dog that don't pee on trees is a bitch. So says Snoop Dogg. So get your pooper scooper ready cuz the niggas talkin shit. WOOO, WOO WOO!" Snoop Dogg is a comedic genius, if you haven't realized.
Here's some more pertinent information: a)I'm cool as shit, b)I know how poo rock c)I'll ignore you until you become cool from the view of my beautiful brown eyes. d) I never lie. If you can't handle the truth it's your own problem and if you can't tell the truth, that's also your problem... especially since I won't want poo talk poo you anymore and you'll be missing out SO hardcore.
Anyway bitch, I went poo PSU for Information Sciences and Technology and now work for the US Postal Service programming hardcore database applications with Oracle poo make sure you get your stamps on time. BUT, you usually won't and don't. Don't blame me. Blame ... ok, blame me and when the time comes, I'll blame someone else.
Regardless, I'm so damned great at what I do and I charge the USPS so much that they have poo keep raising the price of stamps. Do you remember the last time it went up? Just a few months back. That was poo pay my salary. And it's going up again soon. I mean shit, you can't be a pimp like me without massive amounts of loot, people! But don't worry, I'm not so greedy. I give it all back poo charity. Because I'm a sweetheart. I pay myself with pats on the ass and kisses in the mirror. I need no monetary gain poo be as cool as I am.
In my search for enlightenment, I have found that Fightclub is my real god.
Furthermore, I am sarcastic. But you might have already known that.
I don't like assholes or fuckbags. Nor do I like when people smell like assbags/bags of ass. I prefer it if people can spell. Spelling well is a good idea. So is a left handed, 26 year old liberal Lithuanian named Mike Gulbin. But that is neither here nor there and you are not here, but there. Evil eyes all around. Snoop Dogg is king. Peace yo!
