READ BEFORE MESSAGING US
With the overwhelming amount of pointless questions we get, it seems a frequently asked question sort of section is in order. SO, before you decide to ask us why we might be requesting you or who we are, read on and you might be able to save yourself the embarrassment ;).
Who are we? We're a five-piece rock band hand-picked by P. Diddy himself so he could get his hands on white America's money as well. No, we are a south Chicago band that will be on your stereo eventually whether you like it or not. We're not trying to change or save the world. We're simply trying to give you some wicked background music while it goes to shit. Strictly entertainment folks, but if we strike a nerve, great. I just don't feel we have the right to say our opinions are any more valuable than anyone else's Right Scott Stapp?
Why are we adding you? Seeing as our record label section isn't properly filled, we are obviously struggling to become known. So until Victory Records or some slick Sony rep is on our metaphorical doorstep, we are trying to meet as many potential new fans as possible. So don't message us asking why. It's rude, and if you do, you won't get a response, except maybe a reply with a picture of your mom getting railed by Pete in an afro wig. He's so gangsta! Anyways, we strongly encourage the rest of you to share us with your friends. Like we say, it's like sex through a speaker. But no one wants to have sex alone now do they? Get a partner, it's much more enjoyable that way, less shameful too. Pass us around like the blunt (or mono) at a fourteen-year-old skater's garage party.
How old are we? Brooks - 18. Miller - 21. Thompson - 21. Peter - twentyTWO. Zack - 22.
When will we be playing your town? As soon as we can afford to drive our happy little selves out there. We're doing this little thing called self-promotion and working full-time because we've realized that the arts don't pay the bills. That's probably why VanGogh cut his ear off, so he wouldn't have to hear the nagging from his friends and family to get a real job. But hey, if you do good at the spreading our name around part, maybe we'll be to your town sooner than you think.
Why don't we always message you or comment you back? We really try to, because we honestly appreciate every message we get, but working and going to school and hanging out with friends and girlfriends does take time away from our myspace usage. Plus, we attempt to avoid getting too sucked into this damn thing. It's like heroin, I heard Courtney Love is in rehab for it now. But no, we will try to write back, and if not, just know we love you and will one day father your children (yes, you too guys...oh, it's possible. Too far?
What kind of music do we play? I don't know why so many of you ask this...listen to the damn songs. If they don't load, wait it out. Maybe even try a different computer. Crazy, I know, but it just might work.
As for the few meatgazers who are testosteronic enough to challenge our manhood or musical skill through irate messages, from now on I will post your picture (possibly super-imposed on the body of someone getting bukkaked on) and a link to your page along with what you said so that all the loyals can harass you and send you viruses.
What do we eat for breakfast? Innocence and the small children Chuck Norris doesn't finish.
That is all. Ta for now.
THE FUN VERSION:
On a dark and dreary night while Zack Hanz was slaying vampires alongside the sexy Sarah Michelle Gellar, whom he was dating at the time, he received a call upon his cellular phone from Aaron Miller. Miller was crying because he missed the old band the two had been in together and said he wanted to start a new one. There had been talk between the two for awhile, but nothing had ever come of it. Zack assured him that he had a new career now, one that was more stable. But Miller pleaded and Zack gave in because he couldn't handle hearing a grown man cry and whimper like a dying puppy. And so Miller showed up at the illustrious campus of North Central College with Tony "Doobie" Marquez and Matt Thompson to see what would happen. What they found was a vibe between the four that could not be beat. Sex and machismo oozed from the practice room at 231 Ellsworth. Sarah Michelle Gellar was so aroused by the music that while slaying a vampire she began to orgasm and dropped her stake, leading to her unfortunate death. When our heroes finished their first jam session, they stumbled upon the body of Gellar and Zack vowed revenge. They knew it was up to them to stop the vampires. And so they began work on some of the most wicked music mankind has heard since Simon & Garfunkel (who were ninjas by the way). With something missing from their recipe, Zack invited Matt Brooks, whom he had worked in a band with for a short while. Brooks jumped at the opportunity and added the extra flavor the band was looking for. Things were going as well as they could for a short while, but then suddenly, Tony Marquez lost his hand when he was stoned one day and hallucinated that his stuffed Clifford the big red dog came to life and bit it off. When he awoke the next morning, he found his hand to really be gone. The band sent out a search party for the hand, headed up by none other than Indiana Jones. But Jones hadn't aged well and he had a heart attack and died while leading the band and a few random natives through the jungles of Madagascar. And so our heroes were stranded on this island for 32 days without food or water. They all just barely survived by feeding off of Thompson's ego. Zack refused to eat the ego and instead ate the natives and gained a shocking amount of weight, becoming legally and freakishly obese. Just when they thought they'd no way out of the jungle, Peter Tabisz, ex-bandmate of both Zack and Mr. Miller and Brooks, flew in in his airplane and rescued the boys, wearing a sexy man-scarf like successful pilots do. With Jones dead and the hand still missing, they decided it was a lost cause and that they should find a new guitarist. Peter immediately pointed out the fact that he had two hands still and showed his license to rock, and the rest is history. So open your hearts and minds, and we'll handle opening your zippers. Prepare to orgasm to the sounds of Escaping Ellsworth.
THE REAL VERSION:
Ask any true artist to label their style, and you'll receive nothing but empty stares and uncomfortable groans in an effort to remain unique. This was true of Escaping Ellsworth until recently, when they realized that few people are willing to try new recipes if they aren't at least familiar with some of the ingredients. So take the gravity and depth of Incubus, combined with the energy and youthful emotion of punk and hard rock bands such as lostprophets and Finch, and you'll get just a glimpse of what this Chicago-based band is. Influences are the key. Trying not to sound like anyone in particular, each member has obviously been affected by his chosen musical surroundings. Peter lives and breathes punk music, learning from The Lawrence Arms, A Wilhelm Scream, and Small Brown Bike. Aaron looks to David Silveria of Korn and Travis Barker for inspiration. Brooks has grown up on classic rock guitarists like Jimi Hendrix and Joe Satriani. Thompson primarily takes from acts like Lucky Boys Confusion and Goldfinger. Zack seeks vocal and lyrical advice from Brandon Boyd, John Lennon, Ian Watkins, and a long list of R&B singers. Together, it sounds like a strange flavor. But some of us have unique tastes, and it hints at something recognizable. The best way to judge is by sampling. They would ask you to let it set in for a while, claiming the aftertaste is even more potent and enjoyable. You'll find yourself humming a chorus or two on your way to class or work the next day. Either way, Escaping Ellsworth is in one way the same as every other struggling band: a group of people trying to spend as much time as possible doing what they enjoy, and hopefully even befriend and inspire some people along the way. To say their different and somehow more deserving is just conceited and unfair. It's the listeners that make good bands into great ones. So the ball's in your court. Join the Mailing List Enter your name and email address below: Name:
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Reviews:
Escaping Ellsworth
(Author: 'iMP' Staff)
(Date Submitted: 11/2/2005)
Have you been looking around for a new over powerful but still grounded sound that will knock you off your feet? Ya I've gone and said it....check out this group they have a great attitude and I see big things for them.
Pulver Radio Review May 2005
Escaping Ellsworth - One Thread
These guys have a pretty interesting sound...I guess if you made me classify it, I'd say it's a sort of post-nu-metal-ska-core. Or something. See how many influences YOU can hear. They're from South Chicago.
Pulver Radio Review July 2005
Escaping Ellsworth - One Thread
These guys are from South Chicago. This song starts out with one of the more sinister "1,2,3,4"'s I have ever heard. From what I can gather, this is a group of guys who like to have fun and rock hard. Who can argue with that? Not me.
