i like coke in a can. olives are good too. i enjoy hanging with friends. i steal from retail stores. larry david is a genius. i hate chia pets. i like to cook. pink is my favorite color. scorpion bowls are delicious. i will never finish school. i hate massachusetts. diamonds are forever. percocets are forever also. wine in a box is amazing. i am very sarcastic. i have a dirty mouth. i grew up in a dysfunctional family. kamakazis are my new favorite drink. girls are cunts. i have amazing grammar and spelling skills (i should be an editor or some shit). i work at trugreen chemlawn, the most hated lawn care company in america. the music you are listening to is probably awful, so turn it off right now. land-o-lakes white american cheese is the best. my luck with drinking and driving will soon come to an end. mayonnaise, mustard and relish are all fuckin nasty. i have a wicked bad gag reflex (yet, i swallow loads better than a porn star). i enjoy my boyfriends cock. i used to smoke a ridiculous amount of weed. talking on the phone gives me anxiety. i hate when people TYpe LIke tHIS. i only drink out of blue solo cups. i never call in sick to work. napoleon dynamite is the funniest movie i've ever seen. i love clothes more than you love your mother. i am a coach whore. if you own/wear flip flops, you should be arrested. my tits are not really big anymore from my recent cocaine diet. i am possibly the most paranoid person you will ever meet. i once shit in a bucket and my mother buried it in the backyard due to a temporary septic problem. i destroyed the septum in my nose from years of cocaine use. i will die of a heart attack at age 33 from eating mcdonalds' mcgriddles. if your armpits smell, i would suggest secret platinum protection. i am brutally honest at times, so fuck off and deal with it. dirty old men love me and it sucks. most cops should hang themselves. organized religion is a joke. sirius satellite radio saved my life. i recently stopped taking my psychiatric medications, so i will probably stab you soon. i have degenerative disc disease in my spine. vicodins are not all they're cracked up to be. i haven't been to the dentist in 14 years. i have a big nose and i hate it. i have poor circulation, so my hands are always cold and clammy. i love rollercoasters. my car is a piece of shit. i am a brand whore. i am obsessed with looking at cars' tire pressure and leaving notes under peoples' wiper blades if it is not up to par. i have the best boyfriend in the world. my mother is a scam artist. i have this strange obsession with dr phil lately. i am addicted to tanning. i only drink with a straw. i want to be a madame in vegas, drive a green cadillac, and smoke viginia slims 120's. snakes are the devil. worms are gross too. whenever i get into my car alone at night, i check the backseat to make sure no one is there. i wish i were a meteorologist. snow is gay. i dont know how to save money. im very blunt. the death penalty is stupid. i am obsessed with serial killers. i have bipolar disorder, anxiety issues and a bit of OCD. i sleep with a stuffed animal named dink. i want to meet howard stern. i like glitter and sparkly shit. ive smoked crack a few times and highly recommend NOT doing it. the burger king character is scary. i love pizza. i used to eat bugs and weird things for money. the ocean is scary. i wish i was pretty so i could pose for playboy or hustler. i have swam in alligator infested sewage in costa rica. i have taken far too much acid, and definately had more bad trips than good ones. feet are gross. gel deodorant feels sticky and yucky. i just learned how to use tampons, and i am the fuckin tampon champion. eyeshadow is essential. i want to work with pedophiles when i grow up. trashy lingerie makes for a good time. i dont understand why some girls dont swallow.
If i was a serial killer i would be Jeffrey Dahmer .
The psycho killer of the 90's, Jeffery dahmer abducted, drugged, sodomized, tortured, murdered and devoured his young male victims one at a time. After receiving calls of a rancid stench emanating from dahmers apartment, investigators found the decomposing remains of over 12 young men.
Dahmer would drug his victims, then proceed to drill a hole in their head, inserting acid into the brain, keeping theDONOTBLOCKOURADS .. table table table td.text div { background-image:url("http://media.pimpmyspace.org/online/54
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