Anna

I like people and I like to know things about them, unless it turns into self serving complaints and then i lose interest very quickly. I consider myself a liberal but i don't like immigration (I am also politically incorrect). I have been known to say that people benefit from knowing me. Don't mistake this for high confidence. I am useable- but only for a short while. I am incapable of attachment, over school, and completely perplexed with life. I like to look outside but can't work up the nerve to go there. I hate my attachments to "technology". Have you ever kissed someone and known this is exactly how I would kiss someone if they had no say in it? And it would be appropriate for the sound of wedding bells, the perfection of a new born baby, consolation and happiness? I have. I like that it is summer now; I can read all the books I have saved up over the year. I am not as neurotic in summer, probably because of the extended book reading time. When I have spent some time reading, I put down the book and feel like I am in it. In my mind my sentences are more complete. I use bigger words. And everything around me seems more divine, more real. The sound of a bird chirping can send me to splendor. I can hear the pulse of the core of the earth, and can't hide my excitement at my own place in it. The world itself becomes simply words, too. Like the moon and the sun and the grass are just that, and it all seems too perfect. I feel like writing myself, which I might be good at except I would have to stop quite often to pick up a book and read, to be in that space where everything is invented and it is all in my head. Where everything is just as I would want it to be.Someday I will live in a house by a body of water and sit on the porch reading a book listening to the rain fall on what I imagine to be a tin roof. I will take walks in the woods and think by the light of a fire and cook and drink wine. I might be incredibly alone but I won't feel it.