Bugs

I was born at an animation studio in the 1930's. I went into showbiz straight from the start. I began in secondary roles, starring as sidekicks to Porky Pig and such. A pal of mine named Tex Avery got me a part in 1940 for a picture called "A Wild Hare." I starred opposite this goofy dork named Elmer Fudd. Fudd!! What kinda' name is that? And he had this goofy speech impediment... Like he said "wabbits." He was creepy but after "A Wild Hare" became a smash success, he followed me everywhere. I pretended I didn't know him by always goin, "Eh, What's Up Doc?" whenever he showed up. But anyway, I became a huge star and I traveled the world and junk. I became the real deal. I starred with a whole host of screwball actors like Yosemite Sam and Daffy Duck and a bunch of other wannabes. I always made the picture work. I could do it all, Westerns, Romance, Thrillers, Pirate Movies, Sports; but my specialty was comedy... I was kickass I tell ya'!! I fought in the Civil War, visited Scotland, made a wrong turn at Albequerque a couple dozen times, and I even visited Spain and fought a bull. I was on lunchboxes and t-shirts and coffee mugs. I even became the mascot of Six Flags Theme Parks!!! But alas, as people became more interested in violence, profanity, and sex in their movies and TV shows, I was shrouded from the world. I managed to get hooked up with some sweet advertising deals and thats where my real fortune came from. My worldwide fame and recognizabilty was what made me an icon. My perpetual brilliance and genius made me a legend. I tried to make a big comeback a few years back and I managed to hit it big co-starring Michael Jordan (Quite possible the worst actor ever) in "Space Jam." I was a huge success once again but I sorta' fell into hard times and I went into seclusion for a while. I got involved with some bad aquaintances while I was helping out on the Cartoon Network and I got into some trouble. A bit of info... That Dexter kid makes a lot more than you know in that secret lab of his. I checked into rehaba couple years back and I'm glad to say that I havn't had a drink in the past 2 years... I swear! Anyway, I hyped a big comeback; I thirsted for the greatness that came with being loved. I wrote a movie script called "Back In Action" and submitted it to Warner Brothers and they agreed to make the movie. w00t!!! But then the bad news struck. They casted Brendan Fraser as my co-star! BRENDAN "I COULDN'T ACT IF MY LIFE DEPENDED ON IT" FRASER!!! Oooh that pissed me off. Oh well, the movie did OK but now I realize that I should enjoy my life to the fullest extent instead of making movies opposite numbskulls who are better off running from mummies. So I got back together with my old girlfriend Lola and we moved to Beverly Hills and live in extravagence. Life is sweet.