A S H L E Y

Im not perfect nor will i ever be therefore, i dont expect you to be...------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------- Im extremely complex... Unfortunately, ive perfected the art of hiding my pain behind a smile..I got out of my way to make people think im ok when im not..------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------- I smile when im happy, and i smile when im about to cry (only my closest friends can tell the difference between my crying smile and my happy smile) The reason behind my "crying" smile is simply i dont like for people to see me when im vulnerable and i dont want someone feeling sry for me..If i tell you something that is horrible and you feel sorry for me, DONT tell me... For instance, if i tell you my boyfriend and i have broken up dont tell me that you are sorry or that i shouldnt waste my time on it, because most likely that will make me cry and i deff dont want to cry... Do not tell me that i deserve better because at that point there is ntohing better, because to me that person is perfect.....no matter how much you try to convince me otherwise and most likely im not gonna listen and its not because im rude its because i dont want to believe there is something better and if i dont want to do something, then im not gonna do it---------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------- When i fall for someone, thats all that matters...I fall fast and hard...and i get stuck on that person and im not gonna give up on the "us"....when i love, i love forever...I once heard a saying " You either love someone or you never loved them at all" and i honestly believe that...you never stop loving someone...they will always be a part of you and dont try to convince yourself otherwise...----------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------- NEVER be scared to love someone...its not fair to them or yourself..------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------- I think very little of myself..I know im not ugly but i dont think im great to look at...Im not saying that to get attention or to hear you say "Oh ashley you're gorgeous" or whatever, im saying that because that is what i believe...I know that may be a bad thing that im not as confident in myself as i should be, but we live in a world where looks are everything and it shouldnt be like that BUT no matter how much you try to deny it, everyone knows looks matter..thats just the way it is and ive come to deal with that fact...------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------- I LOVE TO BE IN LOVE.......&& I LOVE to fall asleep when the person that i care about------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------I dont understand the point of dating a new guy every week....not only is it stupid its pathetic....You're no better than anyone else if you can get every guy in your grade to date you...Because the only one that matters is the guy that you truly love and once you get him then you can feel like you've truly accomplished something... In the end it doesnt matter how many guys you dated, it matters how many guys actually MATTERED...thats ALL that counts and thats all that will ever count..----------------------------------------------------- ---------------------- I can be irritating or downright obnoxious at times and for that im sorry but i just cant change...thats who i am and thats who i'll always be...Dont get me wrong i can be serious when i need to be but when being serious isnt important then im not gonna be....i get attatched easily....Im an incredibly random person and i occasionally get weird urges to do weird things...this sometimes scares people... I LOVE to bust out in the most random song at the most awkward times...i love my family and friends more than nethign in the world and dont no where i would be without them...sometimes i can be too nice...i cry easily... ------------------------------------------------------------ -- I never give up....because the things that really matter are the things that are hardest to find or get--------------------------------------------------------- ---------------I have moods....You might be like OMG shes PMSing so stay away from her...and honestly i could care less because there are just some days when i dont wanna be around or talk to anyone and i may not be very good at pretending to be friendly at that point in time... I may have a day where i just want to be with that special someone and noone else...and if you're my friend dont be offended if i dont want to hang out because its nothing against you i just want to be with that person and only him...&& i might have a day where i want to be around everyone and do everything possible---------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------- I LOVE to take pictures...not necessarily of myself but of my friends...-------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------Never EVER pretend like you are better than someone because noone is better than anyone and that's a fact...Just because you can play basketball and i cant doesnt make you better than me and just because i make straight a's and you dont doesnt make me any better than you...------------------------------------------------------ ---------------------------------------------------------- Love isnt perfection, love is imperfectly perfect....It wont be easy and it takes time...Heartbreak kills...LOVE is an addiction--------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------Those are just somethings that i wanted to get off my mind...leave a comment if you want...it wont hurt my feelings if you dont but if you do, it'll most likely put a smile on my face-------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------Laugh hard; Smile always && most of all Love eternally--------------------------------------------------- -------------signed----------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------ -----------ASH ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------ --------------------------------------------------------