I wonder if it's possible to gain friends here if I don't list any interests or favourites. What do you think? Uh, that's if anyone's reading this, which I highly doubt. So the answer is no!
Edit: Apparently I can get friends without revealing anything.
Thierry Henry
Arsenal's greatest goalscorer of all time. Possibly the fastest man ever to lace up a football boot. Great pace, great technique and can score the outrageous. Pure genius.
Muhammad Ali
Considered by many to be the greatest heavyweight boxer of all time, as well as one of the world's most famous individuals, renowned the world over for his boxing and political activism.
Tupac Shakur
Consistently ranked by fans, industry insiders and music critics as one of the greatest rappers of all time. Tupac is known for the political, economic, and racial equality messages that pervade his work.
Nope. Not going to tell you. As I said before, I'm not going to list any of my favourites. Can't you friggin' read?
Okay, let's play a game. I'll re-enact scenes from my favourite movies and then you'll know what they are without me actually telling you. Too bad you can't see me though. I guess you'll never know.
:( --You
Seriously, you're an idiot because you continue to read this entire column. I'm not giving away any information about myself! Deal with it, you moron.
:'( --You with an emo tear
This is the second last category that I have to put up with. You still can't break me. I won't tell you a thing. I win this round. (What am I talking about? This isn't even a game!)
Your mom. And yes, I'm lying. Wait. Maybe I'm not. She may be my hero because she had you. Awww.