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YOU KNOW YOU ARE ALBANIAN WHEN...A visa is not a credit card, it's a card that gets you in the US....You refer to your dad's friends as aja [uncle]You curse at your teachers or strangers in Albanian....You can spot an Albanian a mile away..After a family meal, the women fight to the death over who should wash the dishes while the men sit on their ass and discuss politics impatiently waiting for their tea. ..Your parents want you to become a doctor or engineer. .Your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you to dinner even if you're in the next room....You have at least thirty cousins (that’s only 1st ones)....You arrive one or two hours late to a party and think it's normal....You are standing next to the largest suitcases at the Airport....You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house....When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover they know one of your relatives back home...Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs when making long distance calls. ..Your mother does everything for you if you are male & you do all the housework and cooking if you are female...Your relatives alone could populate a small city.....You still came back home to live with your parents after you graduate college...You teach Westerners swearwords in Albanian...You always say open the light" instead of "turn the light on"...Your parents drink 6 cups of tea a day...You say "I took my kids a bath" instead of "I gave them a bath".You've had a shoe thrown at you by your mother.You're proud to be an Albanian - and you pass these jokes on to all your Albanian friends