Dangerous men, pioneering women........................I want to put my head on Dolly Parton's lap, seduce Christopher Walken, be Dylan Dray's little sister, shake Ayaan Hirsi Ali's hand, chomp George Peppard's cigar, mimic Angelica Houston, elect Aung San Suu Kyi, meet my grandmother Ellen, play chess with Steve McQueen, be painted by Alphons Mucha, fund Clive Stafford-Smith, rent a room from Charles Rennie Mackintosh, humiliate Andy Warhol, stroke Ron Mueck's hair and ask him about his dad, lick Serge Gainsbourg's cigarette papers, cure my aunties, collaborate with Richard Hawley, dance to my death, channel Anouk Aimee, duet with Janis Joplin, tease Picasso, tango with David Bowie, cuddle Miss Havisham, visit New York with Leonard Cohen, tell lies on Sigmund Freud's couch, end honour killings, go mad with Edie Sedgwick, decline Nick Cave, go skinny dipping at the Icehotel, drink hot wine in furs, go drinkin in Paris with Charles Bukowski and Peter O'Toole, slavedance like Beyonce, swing on a star, bitch-slap Venus, give Abelard a piece of my mind, take opium with Byron, pull Elisabeth Siddall out of the bath, interview Eva Braun, give Job a chinese burn, party with The Earl of Rochester, honey trap Mata Hari, play dress up with Monroe, have WB Yeats be my second dad, be shot by Harry Kumel, light Billie Holliday a candle, drive the Snow Queen's reindeer, eavesdrop on Jack and Robert Kennedy, edit John Cassavetes, hit Peter Lawson, silence Margaret Beckett, cousel Stendhal, emerge from a giant oyster shell covered only in diamonds, reassemble Mary Queen of Scots, shoot Shaw's Cleopatra, bottle Victorian faeries, topple in Vivienne Westwood, conspire with Madame de Pompadour, have Machiavelli be my slave, swathe in Alexander McQueen, spin straw into gold, be bitten by Jeremy Brett, scream with Francis Bacon, touch Angelina Jolie, fall for Vincent Gallo, forgive myself, listen to Shostakovich, watch Sarah Bernhardt, rehabilitate Robert Downey Jnr, delete 2006, write the perfect song about loneliness, have a girlie weekend with Dorothy Parker, chase a big Lion, learn how to take photos, ............and see Lucy Sholl again.
Your arch-nemesis is: Charlie Chaplin
Why? Because you are both competing to be the world champion of strip chess.
The winner will be... You
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