WORMFOOD

Oct 26, 2005 12:36am From Metal MayhemHow do I ask the right question?Is there a right way, to ask you these question without either of us getting frustrated and angry? I would like nothing more than to cooperate, and work with you, to figure out the source of your guidence.How can I understand where you are coming from? When I myself do not understand my own life. I do not have the right questions to ask you. Becuase I am unsure of where you have come from, and where you are going. I cannot understand what you are trying to say cause you soul is screaming so loudly over you. How can I come to understand, How this all came to be, in rational, realistic way?I know what you must have felt like, to be Repeatedly Baggered by Two Women. I am no help especially. I loved you so much I thought that If I stuck around we would be what each other has always wanted IN and OUT of life. I do not believe that is possible today however...We both, I guess have drifted away?I don't know how to go about this...I am stumped. I just want to try and understand where you might have....Stopped caring and thought "What the hell!" I could be very wrong.I am not going to tell you that I love you...And I am not going to tell you that you need help.What I am going to tell you is, remember WHO loves YOU the MOST out of all the people that have treated you like shit...YOUR son...Daemon, loves you! HE thinks the whole world of you. YOU were the coolest Father to him! We were always talking about you, when he would come over to my apartment and watch movies. He always seemes to want to help me when I felt sad, or angry, or depressed...And the I would ask him W.W.D.D? (What Would Daemon Do?) And he would smile and say, Draw or listen to music, maybe try writing on something to take my mind off of it...He such a smart boy! He trys a lil too hard to be like how you used to be...He stands so tall and proud of who he is. He is proud of his Father for being a smart Acrtiulate, innovative person that he is. He takes so much after you!And when he was worried about you, who do you think he asked? When he was worried about me, he would make sure that I was at least smiling when I wasn't feel a 100 percent. And I know he did the same for you!This Young Man. Your son, is missing his father! He is lost without you, What would be do without your guidence, without his father showing him and teaching him all that he knows and more!Don't you remember the day he was born? Do you remember his first drawing and what it was?Don't you want to be there for your son? Is he not important enough for you to realize that he's worth more than anything the universe has got to offer? I know you love him, but you have got to face the fact Dave....You are going to be stuck in the streets, alone, never again being able to see your son again, never being able to hold him and tell him that YOU love him...Why would you want to ever give that up for any business, and/or people who are just helping further and further away from you son!I am not evil Dave! You know that. I am a confused woman, I may not know much about life and its up's and down's. But I do know what its like to be abandoned, to feel left behind and unwanted. I know you, know too what its like to feel that way.By not getting help you understand that, You will be abandoning your son? You know that once, you have accepted your plan of exsistance, and all its infinite array of parties, that you will still be alone. You are abandoning yourself for the sake of proving yourself right.How do I get out of you, what made you feel like you couldn't get help? Do you realize what you are doing? I mean I have to ask, cause your frighting all of us away. well maybe not me...I still want to be there for you, so long as you know, that I just want to stop take it slow, understand how and why you came to be a "different" personality?Dave in what way can I help you to help yourself? Okay maybe not the right words... How do I phrase it so that I do not make you mad at me.I am running out of ways to say that all I want to do, Is that you are getting all that you deserve in life.I have always thought you to be a well spoken individual. You had a way with words.I haven't stopped thinking of you, I care very much about you and your family. I am NOT out to hurt anyone. And I do not want anything in return. All I want is to see Daemon with his father again, going out to go get comics, and jack in the box.Please let me help you.