Bobby Rome

well im a student at the university of North carolina, im also on the football team. im from the 757 norfolk,va A little bit about BROME From me to u...inspiration motivation, or whatever 7N7Man I am sooooo tired... 6am morning workouts, jump rope, 300’s, stairs, drop back drills, side slides fuck!!!! “Man I want to be the best football player ever”... but with all the times coach yell at me, injuries, fights and on top of that, torched egos!! I mean is it really worth it...think about all the countless hours I spent in the backyard by myself with just me, myself, and my football...I mean its not that I need to be the greatest.. But shit man, I deserve it… Its like this break I need; is lost. I mean the harder I pull, the further away it gets from me...I made football my life, which means difficult takes a day and impossible takes a week...even when I feel like the underdog is on top i end up getting knocked down to the bottom again... but what if my picture don’t fit the frame???I want to be featured in commercials, do football camps, allow my parents to retire, have interviews with oprah... yeah I have goals and asperations... I have that song eye of the tiger on tape as motivation... shit I don’t even want the fame or the money… well shit I do need the money... but u know what I mean.. But damn what if my picture doesn’t fit the frame???I love my little girl so much… I want to raise her and teach her all the things that were taught to me... i want to shelter her from pain, keep her out of danger, and allow her to have all the opportunities that a lil girl should have... shit on the real I would die for her.. But what if I cant give her this?? What if I fail her??? What if my picture doesn’t fit the frame???I listen to lil bow wow and Ciarra's love song in envy... I see jay-z and Beyonce sittin at the Knicks games happy as hell… I often envision total happiness and how I would want things to be...I wanted to give my special someone that fairytale book love... I wanted to shower her with roses just cause… Explain to her that I appreciated her for being my crutch when I needed her...that shoulder to cry on and the wind beneath my wings… I wanted to give her the most euphoric orgasm making her toes curl and her body sweat while her mind wonders in extacy as I whisper sweet nothings in her ear and answer every question of satisfaction and fulfillments that her body and mind could never imagine… I wanted her trust for me to be sooo strong that if she saw me in the Nelly tip drill video she wouldn’t even start to think that I would do her wrong… Well yeah thats kinda asking alot... I wanted float away on a cloud with her. I wanted our lifes so dreamlike that we would never go to sleep... I wanted to give her the world....If possible I would try to spend every second, every hour with her...I craved being around and held by her...if we were to be apart I wouldn’t be able to wait to hear her voice or see her face.. I would want more for her then just myself...she could've ask me to do anything an I would do it...thinking about her gives me butterflies...I smile at the thought of being with her... when she would call I would get nervous and brush my hair or put my du -rag on and brush my teeth like I had to be perfect...just her essences gave me the chills… But what if I can’t handle a women that complete?? Why have I pushed so many away?? What if she is standing right before my eyes being patient and my time is up?? Was it because my picture didn’t fit the frame...Man on the real, I want to be soo spiritual that I could be like my preacher and stop dead in my tracks in the middle of the mall and start praying and shouting... I want to be able to fast for days and stand in the gap for my friends when they aren’t strong… I want to be able to praise and worship in church and not have to sweat that the preacher is talking to me when he’s preaching... I want the lord to know that in my heart I mean well and all the negative stuff Im doing is only temporary... and in time I will be the son he always knew I would be... but what if I don’t stop… What if my picture doesn’t fit the frame??If I don’t accomplish all these things will I be a failure??? Does a degree and a 9-5 job defines me??? Will just getting over ever end... my mother cries and pleads for me to get my act together...Bobby please cut your hair, u know that they are gonna stereotype u as soon as u hit the door.. bobby im not gonna be here forever to protect u... all i want from u is to be successful... all your mom wants from u is to live up to all your expectations.. My mom would say “ u owe yourself as well as the world the gifts that were giving to u.. I work everyday til I almost cant stand.. I take crap off people not because I have to but because im scared u wont get the picture...I increased my insurance policy because Im afraid u will be on the street somewhere… boy u have been beyond your years for as long as Ive known u.. I have chest pains every night worrying about u... If u only knew how much me and your father believe in u… All u have to do I wake up baby”... it hurts just typing this man.. Me writing this confirms how scared I am that my picture doesn’t fit that frame...I mean theres soo much pressure... i try everyday to live right.. i try to be honest...its like the more i try to befriend people the more they talk behind my back...the more i try to explain my imperfections and my past bad decisions the more and more they sound like excuses...”But It seems like doing the bad things are more fun then doing whats right.. its more adventurous”… but maybe Im addicted to the wrong shit...I feel like Mccants sometimes.. I was born to be hated but dying to be loved... but love isnt the problem.. shit i could blame it on everything in the world but thats no longer an option nor my way out... I blame myself.. I mean after all the women, the hot clothes, all the wisdom bestowed upon me, all the opportunities ’that where thrown my way, an all i have to show for it is a tarnished life that needs to be turned around.. but what if i cant turn it around??? What if my picture doesn’t fit the frame..At the end of the day I cast a sense of urgency over my life… and I denounce every shadow of doubt about my future away forever… cause I take it all out of my hands and put it in his... and when I think about his greatness all I can do is cry and say thank u for letting me make those mistakes cause now I am a better man because of it.. I’ve survived the darkness nights and the coldest mornings... the game owes me now and I will be collecting for the rest of my life… whether it be the game of football, the game of life, or the game of love... because of my life i am now whole..and i hope everyone else can be as well.. MOMMA PLEASE WIPE THOSE TEARS CAUSE IVE FOUND THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION OF WHAT IF MY PICTURE DOESNT FIT THE FRAME... IT WAS NEVER ABOUT THE FRAME.. IT WAS REALLY ALL ABOUT WHO TOOK THE PICTURE...

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