5725402 - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Alright, about me... I don't really know what to say here. If people want ask me something about myself, I'll tell them anything they want to know. But I feel weird starting with a blank space and just talking about myself. I'm laid back and passionate; smart and ignorant; brilliant and dull; perceptive and naive; quiet and assertive; introverted and gregarious; serious and silly; predictable and spontaneous. Above all else, though, I like to laugh and make others laugh. It's my favorite thing to do. So, if my brief synopsis has peeked your interest, drop me an e-mail, because I'm also a loner who enjoys meeting new people. :-)~
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Some little facts to help you cope with the universe:

If you cut your fingers off in shop class, you're going to fail typing.
The Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything is 42.
God's final words to his creation: "We apologize for the inconvenience."
The capital of Greenland is Nuuk.
Average Population of the Universe: Zero. (The Universe is an infinite space and the population of the universe at any given time is finite. Any finite number divided by infinity is, effectively, zero. Therefore, anyone you meet while in the Universe is just a figment of your imagination.)
You are experiencing chronic hallucinogenic schizophrenia. (See above.)
Hebrew has 99 different words for God.
The only war the French have ever won is the French Revolution, which was utterly impossible for them to loose.
The square root of 12,345,678,987,654,321 is 111,111,111.
You are a god damn idiot, and I will prove it mathematically: Start with your current age. Now subtract 10 years from it. Were you smart back then? Of course you weren't. You were a goddamn idiot! The fact of the matter is you're just as big an idiot today; it's just going to take you 10 more years to realize it.
The proper name for a wildebeest is a gnu.
Thank you, come again.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

I want to meet a cool girl to date and just have fun with, whether or not it gets serious. Oh wait, I did and we fell madly in love! Well, I'm still up for meeting interesting, fun people of either gender to just chat and hang out with. I'd especially like to meet people who have read Ayn Rand and like to talk about Objectivism or just philosophy in general.
Also, I wish I could meet Ayn Rand, Bruce Lee, Douglas Adams. Maybe in the next life...

My Blog

Migratory Bath Towels

.. .. .. .. .. .. .. In my time thus far as a married man, I have learned that women come with their own peculiar breeds of household items that I had never before identified ...
Posted by on Tue, 31 Aug 2010 11:34:00 GMT

Why God can't exist.

A basic understanding of physics makes it very clear that God not only doesn't exist, but in fact can't exist. To explain, we first have to identify what makes a god, a god. There are three key qual...
Posted by on Thu, 24 Sep 2009 14:44:00 GMT

Gods Total Quality Management Questionnaire

God would like to thank you for your belief and patronage. In order to better serve your needs, He asks that you take a few moments to answer the following questions. Please keep in mind that...
Posted by on Sun, 23 Nov 2008 21:40:00 GMT

The Wrong Email Address

A lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address!A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they...
Posted by on Tue, 16 May 2006 18:06:00 GMT

Good Old Henry

Mildred, the church gossiper and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business.Several members did not approve of her extra curricular a...
Posted by on Wed, 29 Mar 2006 15:34:00 GMT

Plato and Aristotle Go Camping

Plato and Aristotle camping in the desert, set up theirtent and fall asleep. Some hours later, Plato wakes hisdisciple, "Aristotle, look up at the sky and tell mewhat you see."Aristotle replies, "Mill...
Posted by on Mon, 27 Mar 2006 21:13:00 GMT

Two Little Pigs

TWO LITTLE PIGS As President Bush gets off the helicopter on the back lawn of the White House, he is carrying a baby pig under each arm. The squared away Marine guard snaps to attention, salutes, an...
Posted by on Wed, 08 Mar 2006 01:09:00 GMT

How to impress the oppostie sex.

To impress a woman: Wine her. Dine her. Call her. Hold her. Surprise her.Compliment her. Smile at her. Listen to her. Laugh with her. Cry with her. Romance her. Encourage her. Believe in her. P...
Posted by on Mon, 27 Feb 2006 01:07:00 GMT

Please join me in raising a pint to Queenstown!

Ok, Queenstown is offically my favorite place in New Zealand. This last week here has definitely been the most fun I've had on this entire trip. Not even counting the extreme activities I've done, Que...
Posted by on Fri, 24 Feb 2006 01:07:00 GMT

"The most depraved kind of man, is the man without a purpose."

Hey everyone. Today I got back from another hike called the Hollyford track. The brochure calls it "one of the most beautiful valleys in New Zealand." Now, it was very nice, b...
Posted by on Fri, 17 Feb 2006 00:47:00 GMT