Senorita Solitaire profile picture

Senorita Solitaire

A Certain Kind of Savoir Faire

About Me

If I include you in my Friends, I probably really know you. I rarely accept random Friend requests from people I've never met; I'm not one of those people who adds tons of strangers just to make them seem popular. More about me: I play piano and am lucky to own an antique Steinway grand. I'm a graduate of Rollins College in foreign languages (Russian, German, French). I copy-edited for a major newspaper for 6 years, then was an editor for a nationwide travel publication/roadside service for 3. That company (whose name starts and ends with "A") skirted the law to fire me citing false reasons when I became seriously ill. I fought Death for a few years and now I am a textbook proofreader. I've also been published in Dell puzzle books (yes I'm a geek). I am also a Disney theme park addict and always looking for more Disney friends. The Haunted Mansion is my favorite place to be. I collect the late author/illustrator Edward Gorey: I have several hundred pieces and one day hope to display them in a gallery. I try to write short stories in the vein of Mr. Gorey, and I am looking for a Gorey-esque illustrator.

My Interests

Edward Gorey, Danny Elfman, kickboxing, yoga, Saluki hounds, Broadway musicals, bats, The Haunted Mansion...

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I'd like to meet:

My Lower Case n ..
Black Sharpie
Element: Ether (Dictionary: The element believed in ancient and medieval civilizations to fill all space above the sphere of the moon and to compose the stars and planets.)
Sense: Sight
Gemstone: Onyx
Some Qualities: Mysterious, Protective, Independent
Fact: Legend says that one day while Venus, the goddess of love, was sleeping Eros/Cupid cut her fingernails and left the clippings scattered on the ground. Because no part of a heavenly body can die, the gods turned them into stone, which later became known as onyx.
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Music:

Loverboy, Oingo Boingo/Danny Elfman, Queensryche, Duran Duran, David Bowie, Eddie Money, Camille Saint-Saens, Erik Satie, The Mission, Johnny Cash, INXS, Alice in Chains, Rush, ...

Movies:

Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Breakfast Club, What Dreams May Come, Labyrinth, Meet Joe Black, Edward Scissorhands, Hook, The Dark Crystal 

Television:

Not much TV-watching here except reality shows that involve talent in the arts.

Books:

Lord of the Rings, The Master and Margarita, Crime and Punishment, The Count of Monte Cristo, The Narnia Chronicles, The Last Unicorn, Jane Eyre, Peter Pan, The Secret Garden, The Earthsea Trilogy, The Dark Is Rising Sequence, A Wrinkle In Time, Pride & Prejudice, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Poe. This is one of my own stories:
CHRYSANTHEMUM JANE
By Beliial Wm. Smirkly (an anagram of my name)
There once was a girl named Chrysanthemum Jane
Who felt sure she’d expire in mortal pain.
Each day in her rose-gilded vanity mirror
She’d practice her grimace of horror and fear.
From her shadowy playroom spilled gruesome sights--
Cobwebbed gallows, menacing knights,
Hundreds of bottles with skulls on the label,
And a coffin that doubled as bed and tea table.
Her favorite pastime, Ring-Around-Rosey,
Usually ended with more “Ash” than “Posey.”
Her Victorian dollhouse was quite a lost cause,
Its victimized hosts wrapped in soot and burnt gauze.
The mammoth pink bow Jane wore in her hair
Served to belittle all else that was there.
Though her noggin was tiny, her mind was not so,
It rivaled the size of the mammoth pink bow.
Prone to amnesia, Jane often mislaid
Her collection of things that had partly decayed.
It was fortunate then, that as nature goes,
To find it she only must follow her nose.
Jane made believe each day at lunch
The gargoyles poisoned her blackberry punch.
She’d flail and kick and throw a fit;
Her parents were quite used to it.
“She IS a bit odd,” her mum would concur
When Jane’s eccentricity whipped up a stir.
Not a little afraid of her dark offspring, she
Just chalked up the matter to Jane's ADD.
Whenever things would go awry
Chrysanthemum Jane would never cry.
She’d rise up on her toes and dance
And murmur garbled wordless chants.
It was mostly in times that the world seemed so flawed when
Jane daydreamed herself in some cannibal cauldron.
But before she would get to the part where they ate her
The fiends were devoured by a mad alligator.
Sometimes she’d pretend she was hit by a bus,
Which always kicked up quite a fuss.
How the maid hated Jane’s morbid whims!
She always was tripping on Jane’s splayed limbs.
Jane’s mummy and dad, concerned with her mood,
Believed a pet might do her good.
Into getting a puppy, they thought they had tricked her
But Jane’s heart was set on a boa constrictor.
The parents had promised; they had to agree.
The pet store clerk, glad to be reptile-free,
Had been fast running out of his cages and tethers
For THIS boa wasn’t the kind made of feathers.
Jane named the snake Gorgon and fed him on currants,
Cinnamon rolls, and a couple of servants,
But no matter how fiercely Jane would tease,
Her tiny neck he wouldn’t squeeze.
But one day Jane DID get her chance
To fall to perilous circumstance
When she’d gone walking through the park
Unwisely after day turned dark.
A shady man intending harm
Came up to Jane and took her arm.
Although the creep was bent on murder
Jane just would not let him hurt her.
Jane, it’s true, did welcome danger,
But wherefore had this motley stranger
Won the pleasure of deforming
Any little tyke so charming?
When creepos tried to do her wrong
Jane could be unearthly strong.
She pulled the ribbon from her hair
And watched him gasp his last of air.
Chrysanthemum Jane didn’t die that night
Or to any other thug’s delight
Or serve as plaything or delicate feast
For cannibal or hungry beast.
She didn’t overdose on pills
Or languish away of mysterious ills.
No, the irony is this:
Poor Jane never got her wish
Of falling to some torturous fate
But still lives, at the ripe age of one hundred eight.

Heroes:

My Granddad! Also, Danny Elfman, Gary Oldman, Bruce Lee, Tim Burton, Johnny Depp, Walt Disney, J.R.R. Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, Dr. Seuss. Oh and Rufio (Rufio! Rufio! Ru-Fi-Oooooo!) And of course, Edward Gorey: