CHRIS'S No.1 HO - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I love all animals. Im a heavy drinker and an addicted smoker. I like music butI don't dance. Dancing is for whores and fags. When I start to think too much, I doubt my sanity, but the doubting is what makes me know that Im sane. I have a big bro and a big sister. I also have a little sister somewhere in the world. I sleep next to my dog, spider, and snake everynight. I live in East Oakland nigga', so don't fuck with me. I consider myself a herpetologist. I enjoy cutting up the little creatures to see whats on their insides. I like to photo copy my hand/face/butt. I like to listen to music that makes my mind twitch. I would like to be fed to the sharks when I die, or cremated and put in Costa Rican Rain forests so that the Red eyes tree frogs can absorb me through their skin. I love shooting guns, and I know how to open a butterfly knife the COOL way. I can tell you where most species of animal are native to, and the temp of where they come from. My favorite color is green, but my favorite COLOR is black (what is that supposed to mean?). Onyx is my favorite gem. Getting road kill in at work is usually the most exciting part of the day. I cry when Im watching sad commercials. Im really not all that interesting, and most of the time I just like to sit back and watch everyone else.MySpace Layouts and Free MySpace Layouts MySpace Graphics / Free Wallpapers

My Interests

animals and doing your mom

I'd like to meet:

your mom!! Oh wait...I met her last night and she was good.

Music:

White the wall white the wall White the wall plaster never catch on The white wall plaster never catch on You always have to do it with a big Long John White the wall plaster it never catch on We riding in pink with the walls And the balls and the fetus And the pink in the walls And the bike and the fetus And the pink in the walls With the stripes and the pedals Got the bike wall never catch on

Movies:

chicks with guns always make great films

Television:

i don't watch tv. I have no cable. I prefer to go to a show. Which Twin Peaks character are you?
You are Audrey Horne. You're spoiled and manipulative, but you're also whip-smart and indomitable. You always get your way, even if you first have to get into deep trouble. You are so feisty and independent that you like to think you need no one -- unless, of course, you WANT them -- but in fact, what you really need is a good friend.
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Heroes:

Jeff Corwin

My Blog

my favorite death wish

SO about a month ago my dog ate my newist pet snake whom was only about a week old. I went to bed late one night after playing with the snake. I woke 2 hours later and she was gone. The only reason I ...
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Mon, 08 Oct 2007 12:39:00 PST

another 72

1. You're in the hospital, who on your top 8 comes to visit you?depends on how bad my condition was. 2. If alcohol were banned, what would your reaction be?I'd be purchasing it on the black mar...
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Mon, 03 Sep 2007 02:13:00 PST

and agin, more lame information

ABC's1. A is for age:222. B is for beer of choice:Corona3. C is for career right now:Animal Control Officers Bitch4. D is for your dog's names:Nephthys 5. E is for essential item you use everyday:coff...
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Tue, 28 Aug 2007 03:25:00 PST

fine...

I'm putting my true "details" on my myspace page. Just the facts...
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Thu, 28 Jun 2007 09:58:00 PST

oral sex

Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Sun, 06 May 2007 03:32:00 PST

ouch!

my heart hurts like thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisss much.
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Fri, 04 May 2007 02:14:00 PST

It's not rough sex!

I have been approached by way to many people looking at the scratches on my chest. THEY ARE FROM MY DOG!!!! I have to crawl up a ladder holding her everynight, and she is afraid of hieghts. She trys ...
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Thu, 19 Apr 2007 12:25:00 PST

Nephthys!!!!!!!!

I got a dog!!! I finally decided on a name. 'Nephthys'. Look up the name. It's cool. She's a Dobie. I put pictures up later....
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Sun, 01 Apr 2007 11:57:00 PST

wow

i just took way too much of my anxiety medication. this is fun. work for some strange reason is fun. life is fun. cleaning poo is fun. killing things is fun. folding endless amonts of laundry is fun. ...
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Thu, 22 Mar 2007 02:47:00 PST

I just got the coolest job ever!

I'm gonna work part time for a porn company! I'm not going to be in the porn, and I'm not going to be a fluffer. I'm the assistant for the director. Just doing office type work. I'm so excited. Yeah f...
Posted by CHRIS'S No.1 HO on Mon, 19 Mar 2007 08:01:00 PST