It's sad when people you know become people you knew. When you can walk right past someone like they were never a big part of your life. How you use to be able to talk for hours and now you can barely look at them. im sick of fighting with people who dont have a clue about the world and reality. I'm so over being the only one whos willing to grow and get over myself. Its ridiculous. But ya know what. It is what it is. so im gonna do my best to make peace. Cause this is some bullshit for real. I am who I am, not the bitch u want me to be, just me. My life is constantly changing, and i really think my life would be a good canidate for a reality tv series. In life you just have to roll with it. Literally..... there is the good the bad and the ugly, throughout my life, I have fallen in every catagory. I accept not being perfect, because I don't want to be. I accept people talking shit about me cause I would never in a million years expect anyone not to. And if you do care if people talk shit, just please take my advice, spend your time worrying about something more important then someone who apparently has nothing better to do then talk about your life. There's just more important things to worry about. I have litterally gone to hell and back. I have no regrets, I just have to live with my actions and consequences. i know i have friends who love the shit outta me, and I love that they do, I wouldn't trade them for anything. But sometimes it just feels like I need more then just that. I still feel soo alone!! Right now, my life is crazy, and confusing but, as i have learned; "life is like a bucket of water, it can spill over, but it will all dry up eventually, live one day at a time, & I've been doing that., I spill shit - trip - & embarass myself . My life is messed up. I've been through more shit then you see on tv. nobodys perfect...i no i'm not!! ;) I've been lied to, cheated on, & had my heart stolen. ive fucked up, fucked people up, & been fucked up, but every hit was worth it because I felt it. I knew it was real, life is real & im living it wrong everyday. I'm fucking up royally and doing everything opposite but do i regret one thing? ...Never. because at one point what I did was what I wanted & I got my fucking satisfaction, my life is mine & no stupid bitches can fuck it up for me. I'm the real deal & I'd love to see you try and fucking break me.. Let me tell you somethin I want you to walk a mile in my shoes, and then tell me if your strong enough to wake up everyday and still manage to fucking smile.
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