I was hatched on the shores of valhalla just south of nippopolis, like many of my kind before me i was plunge into an unknown world cold and alone until a family of seal cubs took me in and raised me as their own. they taught me to swim and fish and groom, they also taught me to defend myself aginst attackers by laying very still untill they went away. i lost my entire family after the great seal clubbing of 1887, again i wandered the earth realm lost untill i came across the great shaman known only as K.K. i slithered over to him putting on my most innocent seal face gurgling at him the way seals do so as not to be clubbed. he took me in his arms and nutured me back to health on his bittie milk. i soon grew strong enough for him to teach me his ways he was a wise old man knowing much about the world and the music that dwells within he possesed great skills over the instrument known as the guitar. after twenty years of honing my skils on guitar i finally grew fingers and came to master the craft handed down upon me by my mentor K.K. when he saw that i was fit enough he sent me on the great quest that all musicians must travel, he sent me into the desert to find "the music" i wandered lost and drunk for forty years untill i came across an apparition of satan. lucifer jumped out of the earth and tried to tear my heart out of my knees before i barely escaped only to be confronted by the manbearpig, he jumped and slashed at me savagely trying to slice my cockles. i found the only way to beat the great manbearpig was to play on my guitar a series of groovealicious riffs that would penetrate his spleen his only weak spot and thus destroying him. my hands touched the fret board my guitar let out a shrill cry i was lost in the moment, high on the music. i turned around to see the manbearpig dissapate curl up and die. upon defeating the manbearpig i realised this shit dont make sense and i had found "the music" ever since i have been wandering the earth realm shredding gitar and slaying all who cross my path. i am Gilbo. i'm a survivor, we're a dying breed
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