MySpace Layouts
This is the situation: there's a beautiful princess trapped in a castle watched by a dragon. Here's the end of the story with different styles of metalheads as knights...
POWER METAL:
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
TRASH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princes and fucks her... easy.
SPEED METAL:
Same as trash metal but done 10 times faster.
HEAVY METAL:
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
FOLK METAL:
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordeons, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls sleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave... without the princess.
VIKING METAL:
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his migthy axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL:
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle... then sodomises the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her... then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
GORE METAL:
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her... then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts... then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
DOOM METAL:
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide... the dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert... that's the end of the sad story.
PROGRESIVE METAL:
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes... the dragon kills himself out of boredom... the protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the technics and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory... the princess escapes looking for the "HEAVY METAL" protagonist.
GLAM METAL:
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearence and let him enter... he steals the princess make-up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.
INDUSTRIAL METAL:
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
NU-METAL:
Protagonist arrives in pimpin' SUV and baggy pants. Dragon sees protagonist&..39;s nose ring and snickers. Protagonist whines about bad childhood where his beloved pet canary died and ever since he has been Broken, Numb, Dead Inside, Thoughtless and not Alive. Dragon gets highly annoyed, and eats the protagonist. Princess thanks Dragon.
Velvet Revolver - Slither
Iron Maiden, Guns N' Roses, Judas Priest, Metallica , Scorpions, Hirax , Joan Jett And The Blackhearts, Slayer, Black Sabbath, AC/DC , Ozzy Osbourne, Megadeath, Alice Cooper, Thin-Lizzy , Aerosmith, , Arch Enemy, Sepultura, Twisted-Sister, Manowar, KISS, Pantera, Led Zeppelin, Metal Church, Sabbat, Queen, Testament, Dream Theater, Cradle of Filth, Dangerous Toys, Motley Crue, Nightwish, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Quiet Riot, Scorpions, Skid Row, Slaughter, Soundgarden, Stryper, System Of A Down, Black and Blue, Alanis Morissette, The Rolling Stones, Poison All classical, to many more to list...
..