Basic Guidlines For Being A Real Man
Well, I hate tell you this buddy, but if you’re here because you typed in “how to be a real man†into a search engine then the chances are you are not one. I can only guess that you are one of two things, a bull dyke or, a boy in need of guidance. Either way you have come to the right place. Before we can start learning you will need these items;
1) A penis, real or strap on, this is needed for scratching, fucking and it makes a good towel rack after a shower. Your penis is both your center of power and your kryptonite. Don't ever speak harshly to it .
2) A disgusting habit, don’t ever underestimate the amount of man points one can earn through tobacco use, alcohol use, constant farting, constant burping or public urination.
3) A bad hangover that causes grumpiness at least three times a week.
4) A wife beater, remember wife beaters are like a fine wine they get better with age.
5) At least a ½ gallon of one of these fine beverages should be on hand at all times. Old Crow (nice and smooth), Even Williams (a good friend of Jack D’s), Monarch 3 star Vodka ( which gives an extra bad hangover as a bonus) or if you really want to "man the fuck up" any liquor over 151 proof will be sufficient.
Now on to the learning part of it. If you haven’t seen Outlaw Josey Whales recently than you might be a little lost. Josey Whale’s is as manly as any one can get for three very important reasons. The first is that Whales is a bad ass gunfighter who spits chew on the head of his victims. Second he lets his guns and his chew spit do the talking he doesnt stand there like a little bitch talking shit. Third and most importantly he aint got no love for hoes if you think he loved that retarded bich then you're a fucking moron. After he saved her from the Appaches she gave him trail head all the way to California.
And that's that. How To Be A Real Man . net was built after a couple guys got sick and tired of seeing all these sissy-asses running around, giving our gender a bad name. So now we're here to break their necks and start'em fresh, and to keep the future generation of ever taking such a turn again. For the mean while, How To Be A Real Man will have postings done by;
Caliber Winfield of ScrubLife. You can reach him at myspace.com/scrublife , myspace.com/scrublifemusic, .. at boobies69420 , or personal email at [email protected]
Peter Wolfgang. You can reach him at Wolfgang's Profile
Perhaps in the near future we may need a few more writers for the site, so if you're good, and a fucking man's man, hit us up and perhaps we can work things out. Till then, quit bein such a fuckin' wuss...
