I'm a bit of a Quirky guy. At the moment i'm living in Sydney, Australia, but most of you might know me from my time spent in the Midwest or the East coast. In that regard, my life seems to only let me settle in on place just long enough for me to grow hungry for new experiences. Personally, i kind of like the idea that it's never too late to go try something completely out of left field... It helps preserve flavor and vigor in life.
As it were, so i'm kicking it in the land down under with my life partner Kristin. We're learning all about interesting things like how to properly wrassle a Kangaroo, How to drive on the other side of the road while sitting on the other side of the car, how to successfully outwit a Shark, how to chill like a Koala, and the finer brands of Australian beer - of which, i'm happy to inform you, have nothing to do with Fosters. Actually, i'm pretty sure that most Aussies don't even like the stuff. I think the Marketing Campaign for that beer was a bad rumor started by some nunce in the States.
I'm a gemini. So every positive character trait has a equal and opposite trait just waiting for the right time to throw everyone off. For example, it's not unusual to hear me say something brilliant and something completely idiotic a few seconds apart.
That said, I believe in 4 rules when imbibing alcohol in public:
1) Buy at least one round for your friends.
2) It's never appropriate to take off your clothes and dance on tables, unless you are a reasonably attractive girl.
3) Pay close attention to which doors lead outside, to the restroom, and to the basement. You never know when those details may save you a trip to the hospital.
4) If you see twenty ninjas, pirates, or drag queens on your way out of the bar - don't be a wise @ss. They'll kick the sh!tz out of you.
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