9/21/07
So today is the 21st of September and I'm about to turn 27 on Monday. For those of you don't know this is a special time in my life as I am now only 8 years away from the best year of my life. In the last few weeks quite a few things have happened. First, I broke my iPhone. Being the super trendy person I am, I had to be one of the first in line on the first day that the phone came out. I got the phone, loved it, then thought Apple was a giant corporate tyrant after I dropped the phone, cracked the screen, and couldn't return it.
Second, about a week later I decided to sell one of my amazing Honda Ruckus scooters. For those of you who don't know, I bought a couple scooter about two months ago, and have become addicted to zipping around downtown Dallas on them. On a side note, I made my first and last slightly intoxicated ride home on one tonight. So back to the scooter I was going to sell... I had someone coming over on Monday to look at it at around 6:30. I raced home from work to get it ready and at 6:00 I pulled into my garage, parked my car, and walked over to find.... it was stolen.
All this goes to say that I have had two strikes of bad luck. Any more and this is going to start a trend. I'm not sure if it is kharma or bad luck, so if I have done anything to wrong you, I'm sorry and please forgive me so I put this run to rest!Pics to follow!
7/20/07I live in the hood?? (part 2)So yesterday morning I walked out to my car to find the door open a crack, and the hood popped. Needless to say, I knew what happened immediately. Went through my stuff and found only two things missing - sunglasses and the shiny new lighter that Camel sent me a few days ago. A random robbery or God telling me to stop smoking.6/15/07I live in the hood??A pregnant woman's unborn son was killed early Thursday when bullets shot through the window of her apartment near downtown Dallas struck her in the back. Detectives believe the shots were fired from an elevated portion of North Central Expressway that runs adjacent to the Camden Farmers Market complex.5/26/07So it appears that I will only be updating my myspace page once a month now, so here we go. A couple weeks ago I went to Cancun for a much needed vacation. This years trip was a little tamer than the one two years ago. There were no linen, there were underwear, no older ladies bought me drinks. However, there were mopeds, lots of naps, plenty of drinks by the ocean, some flaming coffee, and plenty of fun.And in case anyone ever wondered, the proper thing to do when all the girls at a party jump into the pool is to ditch your clothes and get in the damn pool.
4/26/073/30/07My apologies for the long delay since the last little post. I swear that cool shit still happens in my life, I just haven't had the time to record it all here. For those of you who care, or who at least read my last blurb, my hard work of eating and drinking as many calories as possible is paying off! I'm up almost 10lbs.! For those of you who don't care go back to reading you Yahoo! headlines.In other news I recently switched from regular milk to organic milk. Mostly because of an article I read the other day that informed me that people are taking longer to decompose in the ground because of all the preservatives we consume, and that the hormones in chicken breast are increasing the bust size of girls across America (not that I'm complaining). Anyway, I decided that I should start consuming as many organic products as possible because I want to be cremated and don't want to show off any man boobs at my memorial service.Now for the reason that I started this post tonight. Last night I went to a certain CCM artist's concert. Afterwards the band and I snuck outside for a smoke and a bit o' whiskey. While outside, behind the venue, one of the sound/security guys peeped his head around the corner and said "Who the Hell are you?". The guys quickly answered that we were with the band, and the little scrapper (short, overweight, gray headed sound/security guy that could probably kick my ass) said he was glad because he was going to fcuk somebody up if we were hoodlums. Then came the amazing line that has kept me laughing since: "Just remember boys, pain goes away, fcuked up is forever." Does is ever get better than this??? It better because I'm only 27.
3/12/07Last night I went to the Ft. Worth Stockyards with a couple and their eight year old triplets. The couple told me they had taken their kids to the zoo that day so I looked at the kids and asked each one of them what their favorite part of the zoo was.Daughter 1: "The monkeys!"Daughter 2: "The tigers!"Son 1: "Buying stuff!"What the hell????Later that night at dinner, daughter two looks up to me, and out of the blue, says "when I grow up... you're going to be dead".What is wrong with kids today?????2/22/07So today on the way to celebrate my mom's journey towards getting her first Mary Kay car, I got in a wreck! I have been in an accident since high school, and it really pissed me off. Some dude in a black truck tried to dart in between me and the car in front of me, clipped my fender and then hit the car in front of him, so I bumped him again. Now my car is ugly and parked at a body shop waiting for a makeover. I guess this is one way to get that scratch on my hood fixed.2/15/07
So all these extra calories make me worry that this might happen to me.2/12/07Beefcake... So for the last few months I have been working out. For most of you this is no big deal, but if you know me, you know that I generally dislike the gym. So... I've been going to the gym for a few months and am now to the point that I want to gain some weight. I'm not shooting for a World's Strongest Man physique, but a little more than my usual skinny self might be nice. To make this happen I have been doing a lot of research and have found out that I need to be eating between 2500 and 3000 calories.At first I thought this was no big deal - I figured I'd buy some protein bars and go on my way. WRONG!!! I have since learned that I'm pretty much physically unable to eat that much food. I would either have to eat a whole pizza every day, or dodge the fat and just not stop eating at any point during the day. So I've decided to eat what I can and wait to see what happens. Maybe this isn't the best idea after all.....
1/29/07My Friends JenThis weekend we made the drive over to Oak Cliff for a night at the fabulous Hotel Belmont. The place was pretty cool, but absolutely freezing. The view of the skyline was perfect. While there, I bummed a cigarette off a table of 40+ year old women listening to a German reggae artist, continued working on my martini obsession, and almost got fighting mad (something that very rarely happens).Below are: my new friend Jen looking like a "very happy giraffe" (her words, not mine), and my old friend Jen showing her perfect wine drinking etiquette.
1/23/07
So last weekend I learned a new game called DRINKO and I'm pretty sure I NEVER want to play again. Those of you familiar with Bob Barker (and his incredibly addictive TV show) will recognize this as a derivative of a great game called Plinko. The main difference with this one is that you have to do tequilas shots when you lose. It is amazing what 6-8 tequila shots in a half hour will do to you. Thanks Michelle for getting me home.Back to The Price Is Right, a few years ago I drove down to Louisiana to see the traveling show at a casino. The good people of OK and LA that were in attendance loved the show just a little too much. This one little, old, and slightly stupid looking lady from OK got on stage to play and after winning a couple hundred dollars got so excited that she literally wet herself on stage. The audience went from roars of laughter to utter silence in seconds. And then the laughter came back albeit a little awkwardly.
