feeble whit

i grew up in a boarding school for gifted/morbidly obese children in armenia. my mother was a wandering gypsy who sold mary kay cosmetics on the side. my father died when he was 12 due to a tonsilectomy incision that got infected and slowly inflamed until one day he could no longer breathe. gasping for air, he stumbled into a capacious fountain and drowned to death. my mother would occasionally visit me at school but hated the moment we said goodbye, so to avoid it she would spike my kool-aid with a rufie and when i came to i was alone in a field, my face painted garishly with comodogenic makeup. at the age of 14, i was expelled from school for accidentally losing 200 pounds because of my pet tapeworm (a common pet in armenia, although most people tend to keep theirs in cages). To avoid appearing size-ist, the administration told me they felt i had suddenly become stupid and the opposite of gifted, and was thus ordered to find new accomodations. I will relate more "About Me" when time permits. Apparently the Apple store is "not a fucking internet cafe, lady."