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The Jacques story: A journey to hull. Jacques, Richard Oliver N. Plural Jacques', also jacquesy boy, dolly or dave ( to one confused vagrant); A philanthropist of the late winsorian period noted for his post modernist art an poetry and his relaxed attitude towards descency and moral behaviour. Richard was born into a middle class family between 1980 and 1984( exact records were destroyed) to Vivian and Paulo Jacques. Vivian a mongolian by birth, had only just been rescued from the Russian forced labour camp she had been imprissoned in by Paulo( a former russian officer) when she gave birth. The pair had fled to England after Paulo had deserted to escape russian persicution. By age nine Richard had excelled in all fields of human endeauour, including mathematics, Nth dimensional metaphysics and Jenga and already had several inventions (Notably the Electric guitar, Glossy magasine covers and the french language) to his name. It was during this period, whilst sculpting beneath a gazebo that the family home was raided by a viscious drunken baboon group who kidnapped Richard. He was never seen again, despite the meticulous destruction of all baboon groups in the local area by his father and other angry men. There are many rumours and urban legends as to the fate or where abouts of richard; there have been reported sightings in delawre, hayes and hull, but no concrete evidence. Rescently however a myspace profile under his name and baring many of his traits has appear,the mystery continues.......
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Well now we those awkward fumblings out of the way, perhaps you would like to learn a little more about the man, the legend, the himpanzee that is Richard Jacques.
