You Know You're a Pothead When...
You think the song "Truckin'" by the Grateful Dead should replace the national anthem.Your music collection is worth more than your vehicle.Your bong is taller than your dog.It takes you more than 30 minutes to roll a joint.You set your wedding date for 4/20.You take off April 20th every year and treat it as a holiday.You spent your last bit of money to score some herbs and don't have enough gas money to get home but you don't care.You start every sentence with - uhhh!.You intentionally roll seeds in your joints on independence day so you can hear the popping because you don't have money to buy fireworks.You eat at Taco Bell more than 8 times a week.You wear sunglasses at night, and see better.You go to the corner store and the clerk automatically tosses a pack of rolling papers on the counter.Your pot tray is fuller than your refrigerator.Your bong gets washed more than your dishes.You sell your car for gas moneyYou are the only tobacco smoker in the room and you look at the cigarette in the ashtray and ask, "Is that my cigarette?"You're eating something on your way home thinking about what you're gonna eat when you get home!Every cylinderical object you see, turns into plans on a new smoking device....Just to be religous, you observe 4:20 in every time zone.Someone has ever come up to you on the street and said "Hi" and you said "Yep."You thought the ebola virus was a type of weed.You think being stoned to death would be a damn good way to go out.You have ever smoked pot before 8 o'clock in the morning.You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other pothead friends.
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You scored as Biting. When it comes to being kinky, your biggest turn on is biting. You love the ectasy of teeth sinking into your flesh, and are probably willing to return the favor. Sex just isn't sex without using your teeth.
Biting
100%
Chains/Handcuffs
67%
Blood
67%
Blind Folds
67%
Bondage
58%
Whips
50%
What's Your Kinky Turn On?
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POTHEAD OR STONER?
You are the MIGHTY POTHEAD!
*STONER- Lights a cigarette just before your ready to light up. *POTHEAD- Knows that there is a cipher and a cig will disrupt that and is best left for the end of the session. *ST- Buys "weed" in small doses (dime bags and such). *PH- Not only buys "What ever the latest avoid the cops lingo is" by weight but has memorized the weight system as well. *ST- Throws the weed when cops are around. *PH- Eats the weed because if I'm getting arrested I might as well go in with a killer buzz.
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Your Porn Star Name Is...
Venus Vegas
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Your Pimp Name Is...
Princess Tease
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Music:
My favorite band is Incubus!! You should like them to :) Although Def Lepard and Poison are pretty good. I like alot of the 80's big hair bands...
Movies:
You Know You're From California When...
The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway.You were born somewhere else.You know how to eat an artichoke.The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.Your car has bullet-proof windows.Left is right and right is wrong.Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.You can't find your other earring because your son is wearing it.You drive to your neighborhood block party.Your family tree contains "significant others."You don't exterminate your roaches, you smoke them.You see 25 lawyers chasing an ambulance.More than clothes come out of the closets.You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.More money is spent on facelifts than on diapers.Smoking in your office is not optional.You pack shorts and a T-shirt for skiing in the snow, and a sweater and a wetsuit for the beach.When you can't schedule a meeting because you must "do lunch."Your children learn to walk in Birkenstocks.Rainstorms or thunder are the lead story for the local news.You'll reluctantly miss yoga class to wait for the hot tub repairman.You consult your horoscope before planning your day.A glass has been reserved for you at your favorite winery.All highways into the state say: "no fruits."All highways out of the state say: "Go back."The Terminator is your governorYou can't remember . . . is pot illegal?It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH"You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from California.
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Whats Your Stoner Nickname? (PICS)
Never Sober
You are the kid who can't seem to put down the Ganja. You often find yourseld feeling more out of your zone when your sober then when you are stoned. You have permantly friend your brains and have aquired the intellgence of a 5th grader. You are fun to hang with but often hard to cummunicate with because you are retarted. Your a Chill person to hang with at the least
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Heroes:
A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic
garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a hole in one
of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of
it onto the pavement.
Noticing this, a policeman stops her.... "Ma'am, there are $20
bills falling out of that bag! "Damn!" says the little old lady.....
"I'd better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for
the warning!" "Well, now, not so fast!" says the cop. "How did
you get all that money?" Did you steal it?" "Oh, no," says the
little old lady. "You see, my back yard backs up to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes, right into my flower beds!" "So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say: $20 or off it comes!" "Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?" "Well", says the little old lady, "not all of them pay up!"
