Parker - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I'm working on developing my own cartoon shorts called HAPHAZARD which I describe as My life crossed with Kevin Smith being molested by Family Guy, but not as funny...My blogs are for people's amusement.....not to offend..they are a rediculous comedic works in progress....not to be taken literally unless it's an experience story...those are true....Just picture most of them as one extreme side of a random meaningless conversation.....Sarcasm, Music, Pop Culture, Romance, Laughing, A Good Fairy Tale, Blunt, Open....just a little of what I'm about...

My Interests

Music:

ahhh long list...... Pearl Jam, Nirvana, Mudhoney, Wooly Mammoth, Alice In Chains, Dozer, Lowrider, Eleven, Sasquatch, Sheavy, Roadsaw, Roachpowder, Nevermore, Manmade God, Poisonblack, Corrosion Of Conformity, Spiritual Beggers, Primus, Tad, Transport League, Ditchwater, Orange Goblin, Post Stardom Depression, The Sword, Sponge, Monster Magnet, Afghan Whigs, Slayer, H.I.M., Throttlerod, Sonic Youth, Acid Bath, Black Label Society, I Mother Earth, Soulbender, Soilwork, Mindset, Colporter, The 69 Eyes, Guano Apes, Mastodon, Jet, Paw, Deadsoul Tribe, Charon, Faith No More, The Black Angels, Bush, Gruntruck, Quicksand, Brides Of Destruction, Eels, The Deftones, Stephen Lynch, Butthole Surfers, Our Lady Peace, Virgos Merlot, Depeche Mode, Soundgarden, Mother Love Bone, Malfunkshun, Temple Of The Dog, Three Fish, Korn, Godsmack, Dropbox, Second Coming, The Doors, Event, Full Devil Jacket, 3, Tool, The Tea Party, Wellwater Conspirasy, U2, The Eels, Placebo, Spike 1000, The Music, Sunna, The White Stripes, Sweet Water, Wolfmother, Buckcherry, A Perfect Circle, Truely, Jane's Addiction, Porcupine Tree, R.E.M., Porno For Pyros, Incubus, Hater, Mad Season, Oceansize, Oasis, Brad, Nine Inch Nails, System Of A Down, Days Of The New, Mad Season, Mushroomhead, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Foo Fighters, Super Deluxe, Candlebox, Filter, Green River, Hater, Stone Temple Pilots, The Melvins, The Killers, Screaming Trees, Satchel, The Monkees, Audioslave, Soil, Garbage, Led Zeppelin, The Beatles, and so much more but i'm done thinking....

Movies:

Any movie based on mythology, Star Wars, The Matrix, Lord Of The Rings, Indiana Jones, Dogma, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Clerks 1 and 2....Kevin Smith is GOD!!!, Stranger Than Fiction, Team America, Almost Famous, Office Space, Mirrormask, Zoolander, Dumb And Dumber....NOT DUMBERER, Willow, Chasing Amy, The Cable Guy, Eternal Sunshine of A Spotless Mind, Return To OZ, Big Fish, Spiderman, All the Xmen, Batman Begins, Equilibrium, Happy Gilmore, The Truman Show, there's a ton more but....I'm done for now...you get the idea

Television:

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My Blog

Haphazard Cartoon Script - Episode 1

So here is the revised script for my first cartoon episode for those who care to send me some love....or hate...or money.....Check out the Haphazard cartoon previews in my pics...Haphazard-Episo...
Posted by Parker on Fri, 20 Jul 2007 07:32:00 PST

The Blessings Of Going Number 2

While reliving the cinematic experiences of my youth today I realized the stand out sequels of most movie franchises I frequent....What hit me over the head with this was Crocodile Dundee 2....by far...
Posted by Parker on Sat, 28 Jul 2007 08:01:00 PST

Fucking Pepperment Patty's Neighbor

In all my days growing up as a Washingtonian male I've never felt this awkward situational emotion from the side I just experienced. I decided to go out on a quick convenience store pick up for a few...
Posted by Parker on Sun, 15 Jul 2007 08:30:00 PST

Assaulted By The Crow For Masturbating

Yesterday I was on my way home from work......excited to crack open the alcoholic beverage of my choice when out of nowhere I was viciously attacked by a huge fucking crow.....It swooped down out of ...
Posted by Parker on Fri, 13 Jul 2007 10:18:00 PST

The Zoo As A Whore House

I went to the zoo yesterday for the first time in quite a while......It was packed with people so much so we couldn't even pay to park in their parking lot if we wanted to because there were no spot...
Posted by Parker on Sun, 24 Jun 2007 10:57:00 PST

Spraying Yourself With Octopus Semen

Well apparently the rules of attraction have been scientifically broken down, solved, packaged and mass produced.....You can now spray your way to a herom of endless vagina of your choice......I came...
Posted by Parker on Wed, 30 May 2007 09:49:00 PST

Marbles

A while back there was this guy that I worked with....He always kinda gave me the creeps.....I mean he was nice enough and all from what I could tell but there was just something about this dude that...
Posted by Parker on Fri, 16 Mar 2007 07:52:00 PST

Making Love To Computers Through USB With Barry White Playing In The Background....

During my jaunt around town this afternoon I was thinking about if there was a fire in my apartment what would be the one thing I would want to run in and grab to not be without....Someone was talkin...
Posted by Parker on Thu, 15 Mar 2007 06:24:00 PST

She-god......

I have a theory......God must be a woman if it exists at all....At least that's what I've come to suppose...just hear me out.....Let's go on a fantasy trip and examine the fairy tale....She-god create...
Posted by Parker on Wed, 09 May 2007 07:54:00 PST

Homosexual Powers Beyond Imagination...

So it was pretty obvious that one of the many reasons the X-Men movies were so well recieved was because you could take the moral issues in those movies and apply them to real life....How mutants as ...
Posted by Parker on Tue, 15 May 2007 01:39:00 PST