Tom Bratland profile picture

Tom Bratland

About Me

I like summer time and moonlight on a wet lawn, any food item with a slice of bacon, old dogs and fat cats. I think beer should only be made with water, yeast, hops and barley. I've never been ambitious because I think being alive is good enough. In my best moments I am focused, don't irritate anyone and can avoid major screw ups.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

George Bush--so I can invite him to my poker game

My Blog

bye bye

Dubya said he's gonna dedicate himself to taking out the trash and mowing the lawn.Wonder if he'll fuck that up too.
Posted by on Wed, 21 Jan 2009 06:04:00 GMT

Noise from a Barking Dog

Whats great about open mic night is that anybody can do it.  And what sucks is that anybody can do it.And anybody can post comments on 9-News-dot-com.  Because people have a right to be heard and say...
Posted by on Sat, 17 Jan 2009 15:30:00 GMT

SantaFe Bike Beans

I bought a bike--a big shiny bike--whoopee! I forgot how much fun bikes can be. I've been riding all over like an idiot. But I also forgot the perils--not enough bike lanes in this city, always some a...
Posted by on Sun, 08 Jun 2008 08:32:00 GMT

Response to Es Creepy 24 Hour Fitness: 24 Hour Stereo-Types

I had no idea, the first time I set foot in that place--thinking it would be good for me--it would become its own kind of psychosis; because it's no good to lift weights once in a while. You have to ...
Posted by on Mon, 10 Mar 2008 14:53:00 GMT

freight train

Kids playing basketball I was watching through a glass wall--stomping shoes and the pivoting squeak of rubber on wood as the sweating heard moves back and forth a CNN combat reporter saying one thing...
Posted by on Sun, 17 Jun 2007 00:38:00 GMT

nice neighborhood

It’s deceptive--this place here where people walk their dogs and the breeze makes the leaves flicker like twinkle lights. And last night, just before 2 a.m. I’m watching the second instal...
Posted by on Tue, 12 Jun 2007 01:07:00 GMT

Lazy Cat

Monday I'm supposed to do a set at Comedy Works--because Monday is Monday and who th'fuck wants to do a gig on a Monday?--nobody, that's who--but Monday's a day to seperate them aimless cluster bags ...
Posted by on Sun, 08 Apr 2007 16:28:00 GMT

The Sopranos--How I think it's gonna end

Tony is gonna get popped--but unlike the anti-climactic end of Johnny Sack--face first in the snow with an FBI man’s foot up his ass--it will be at an auspicious occasion at which he’ll h...
Posted by on Sat, 18 Nov 2006 13:20:00 GMT

The Little Flipper

So, here’s the thing: if the light turns green, you’re supposed to go. You’re supposed to go WHEN the light turns green--then, there, in that moment... when the fucking thing is gre...
Posted by on Mon, 14 Aug 2006 01:08:00 GMT

look at my forehead

Everybody has something stamped on their forehead. Some indication of who they are. Met a girl when I was running at a lake today--she was a bit younger than me, wearing cut-off shorts and a halter t...
Posted by on Thu, 10 Aug 2006 21:06:00 GMT