Allan

I am a 26 year old father of 3 who is anything but perfect. I have a wonderfull and stunningly beautifull wife who has helped me grow and change constantly. I have 3 beautifull children who are absolutely amazing. I have a little house in titusville and at times taking care of it really makes it seem like a huge house. I am a christian although for a very long time I have turned my back on God. I have spent years and years going in circles trying to make myself happy and if there was any time left after that I would make an attempt to make others happy. For the most part I considered myself a good person I still had decent morals and would feel bad when I had done something that hurt someone. But still I was going in circles trying to find the next thing that would make me happy. It wasn't untill recently that I found what I was looking for. Jesus (yes I know his name makes alot of you uncomfortable but that is his name). It took having everything stripped away and my heart being very broken to realize that I cannot do this on my own. But I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me. Now bear in mind I accepted Jesus in my life when I was 15 and ran from him a couple of years later. The funny thing is I thought maybe I could hide from him do whatever I wanted be happy just floating through life unaccountable (WOW I was way off on that one). All the while the spirit, and my wife were reaching out to me, but my pride and my shame kept me from turning to him. But the even durring that time in my darkest of hours he nailed himself to the cross to forgive me... What a powerfull forgiving God it is beyond my understanding the love he has for us. WOW. So I made a choice to give it all back to him ALL everything The pain, guilt, shame, selfishness, lust, greed, finances, relationships, decisions, happiness, sorrow... everything because I cannot do it on my own, no one can. So now I take it one step at a time living in the present a good friend told me God is in the present, he doesn't want us to lust for the future and the riches and resolutions it may hold. He also does not want us to live in the past dwelling on mistakes when we put ourselves in the future or in the past we separate ourselves from him because he is in the present. again WOW. There are lots of other things to me I love to sing, laugh, surf, skate, fish... I love watching my wife smile really smile chasing my boys around watching them learn new things, and holding my baby girl and the sound of her laughing. You see giving your life to Jesus doesn't mean you can't have fun anymore but your focus on what is fun will happilly change. It also does not mean that there will not be anymore problems, I am sure there will be plenty of struggles and very trying times, tempting times but if you put him first he will bring you through them. So right now that is me seeking God and putting one foot in front of the other.