About Me
I WISH
I WISH YOU could know what it is like to search a burning bedroom for
trapped children at 3 AM, flames rolling above your head, your palms
and knees burning as you crawl, the floor sagging under your weight as
the kitchen below you burns. I WISH YOU could comprehend a wife's
horror at 6 in the morning as I check her husband of 40 years for a
pulse and find none. I start CPR anyway, hoping to bring him back,
knowing intuitively it is too late. But wanting his wife and family to
know everything possible was done to try to save his life. I WISH YOU
know the unique smell of burning insulation, the taste of soot-filled
mucus, the feeling in intense heat through your turnout gear, the sound
of flames crackling, the eeriness of being able to do absolutely
nothing in dense smoke-sensations that I've become too familiar with.
I WISH YOU could read my mind as I respond to a building fire "is this
a false alarm or a working fire? How is the building constructed? What
hazards await me? Is anyone trapped?" Or to wonder, ""What is wrong
with the patient? Is it minor or life-threatening? Is the caller really
in distress or is he waiting for us with a 2x4 or a gun?" I WISH YOU
could be in the emergency room as a doctor pronounces dead the
beautiful five-year old girl that I have been trying to save during the
past 25 minutes. Who will never go on her first date or say the works,
"I love you mommy & daddy" again. I WISH YOU could know the
frustration I feel in the cab of the engine, ambulance, squad car, or
my personal vehicle, the driver with his foot pressing down hard on the
pedal, my arm tugging again and again at the air horn chain, as you
fail to yield the right-of-way at an intersection or in traffic. When
you need us however, your first comment upon our arrival will be, "It
took you forever to get here!" I WISH YOU could know my thoughts as I
help extricate a girl of teenage years from the remains of her
automobile. "What if this was my daughter, sister, my girlfriend, wife
or my friend? What were her parent's reactions going to be when they
opened the door to find a police officer with hat in hand?" I WISH YOU
could know how it feels to walk in the back door and greet my parents
and family, not having the heart to tell them that I nearly did not
come back from the last call. I WISH YOU could know how it feels to be
dispatching officers, firefighters and EMT's and when we call them and
our heart drops because no one answers back or to hear a bone chilling
9-1-1 call of a child or wife needing assistance. I WISH YOU could feel
the hurt as people verbally, and sometimes physically, abuse us or
belittle what I do, or as they express their attitudes of "It will
never happen to me". I WISH YOU could realize the physical, emotional
and mental drain or missed meals, lost sleep and forgone social
activities, in addition to all the tragedy my eyes have seen. I WISH
YOU could know the brotherhood and self-satisfaction of helping save a
life or preserving someone's property, or being able to be there in
time of crisis, or creating order from total chaos. I WISH YOU could
understand what it feels like to have a little boy tugging at your arm
and asking, "Is Mommy okay?" not even being able to look in his eyes
without tears from your own and not knowing what to say. OR TO HAVE to
hold back a long time friend who watches his buddy having CPR done on
him as they take him away in the Medic Unit. You know all along he did
not have his seat belt on. A sensation that I have become too familiar
with. UNLESS YOU have lived with this kind of life, you will never
truly understand or appreciate who I am, we are, or what our job really
means to us...I wish you could though. APPRECIATE AND SUPPORT THE LOCAL
EMS WORKERS, 9-1-1 DISPATCHERS, FIREFIGHTERS, LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICERS,
AND DOCTORS & NURSES IN YOUR AREA. ONE DAY THEY'LL PROBABLY BE
SAVING YOUR PROPERTY OR YOUR OWN LIFE. WHEN YOU SEE THEM COMING WITH
LIGHTS FLASHING, MOVE OUT OF THE WAY QUICKLY, THEN PRAY FOR THEM.
