Rach Against the Machine - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I have always and will continue to squeeze toothpaste from the middle of the tube. I am a lyrics girl. I have a crush on Japan. As a kid, I hated to see my mom cry during movies. I found it sappy and disturbing. I cry during movies. If I devoted a quarter of the time and energy I spend to creativity instead of boys, I'd be on my second novel by now. I read a lot of novels. I've tried non-fiction, but it just doesn't work for me. I can't wrap presents or decorate a cake. I will never send you a birthday card. Even if you're my sister. I used to feel like I was destined to make a huge impact on the world. I don't feel that way anymore. But that's okay. Because huge impacts aren't really my bag. Besides, I can sit on my porch at night and look at stars and think. I rarely come to conclusions. But I've come to this one: Love is a pre-sliced grapefruit. I know this because I've seen it.
this is me. looking innocent. and sly. and beautiful. in the snow. with a truck. in japan. bitches. Super awesome pictures from my super awesome trip to Matsumoto.......temple only in Japan the vertical bitch slap partaking in a mural orgy at an elementary school cho beautiful snow monkeys in onsen Andrew and a kamakura me and snow monkeys! huggin' monkeys....aww... New Year's Fun...Harukaze dodgeball Tokyo pounding mochi print club part I print club part II Osechi Who is that beautiful Japanese girl... ...Wait a second... Daddio New Year's had been fun. Rachel: A Self Portrait... brought to you by...
You Are a Schoolgirl!
You're not quite as wild as a "kogyaru", but with your short plaid skirt
and silly white socks, you're still a sexual fetish object.
You can usually be seen hanging out in the girly section of the video game places,
collecting photobooth stickers of you and your friends. You may not be as innocent as you look.
Did those vending machine panties once belong to you? What's Your Japanese Subculture? birthday vanity... the MySpace mandatory mirror shot rockin out to my iPod the Natalie Portman a la Garden State headphones that I got for my birthday... Kelly "Human Ashtray" O'Dette...and now... bathroom fun... splish splash TOOTHBRUSH-VISION I need a haircut...and now...camping... dinner yeehaw the gals our "campsite" me and the gimp mountains trees Rin Blue hoodie Sushi-claus! Sexy beast Grapes! Japanese Jack-o-lanterns Aya-the-hellion My office Aoi Peek-a-boo

My Interests

music, reading, walking around aimlessly, writing bad poetry, pretending to write a heartfelt short story, driving, nutella, running, skiing, russian, battling simultaneous vanity/insecurity, guinness, languages (Japanese is a bitch), traveling, karaoke, french toast

I'd like to meet:

This guyPS- If you don't know the difference between "you're" and "your", please don't bother me.
PPS- If you don't know the difference between "you're" and "ur", don't even THINK about bothering me.

Music:

Almost anything besides rap and country. Everyone says this; I actually mean it. From indie to jazz to punk to classical to bluegrass to cheesy 80s pop, this little lady listens to it all. Pick one up today and explore her versatility. Favorite song of the moment: Breakin' Up by Rilo Kiley

Movies:

Musicals are mother's milk to me. Along with Hitchcock, Hepburn, Grant, Bergman and Bogart. Tasty. I've also recently been cutting my teeth on movies from Hong Kong. With a dash of Japanese films and a sprinkling of Renoir thrown in for good measure. Fold in all the 20-something standards-- Eternal Sunshine, Donnie Darko, High Fidelity, Lost in Translation-- and my movie diet is complete.

Television:

Unplugged and sitting on the back shelf of my closet.

Books:

I read about three books a week. This is evidence that I'm super smart. Or it's evidence that I'm pathetic and don't have any friends. Anyway, some of my favorite authors are Dostoevsky, Roy, Lewis, Austen, Atwood, Hemingway, Dickens, Kafka, Murakami, Mishima, Burgess, Tolstoy, Eliot, Percy, Shakespeare. Oh, and A Confederacy of Dunces is kick-ass. Why did I wait so long to read it? As many of us unimaginitive English majors are, I'm a self-admitted book snob. I don't usually read anything more recent than 1940 or so. I also admit that Moby Dick is the suckiest book I've ever read. Also, what is the deal with The Da Vinci Code? Why was everyone going into orgasms over it? It's obvious he wrote it with the sole goal of getting a movie deal. Speaking of the movie, what is the deal with Tom Hanks? Why does everyone go into oragasms over him? He looks like he's made of plastic. Currently reading:Love in the Time of Cholera

Heroes:

Alyosha Karamazov, Arundhati Roy, Leslie Moruza, my sister (awww...), anyone who creates (something good)

My Blog

Barkeep!

So, uh, yeah... Starting next week I will be a bartender. A bartender! This is another thing I get to check off on my To Do Before I Die List, which includes having a fully stocked ...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Thu, 18 Oct 2007 12:22:00 PST

McDonalds Breakfast (featuring bonus Skylark blog)

I woke up at 7:00 this morning. 7:00 is a lame hour to be up, unless you're coming home at that hour. Or unless you're driving across the country to meet an old friend or something. Otherwise, it's a ...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Fri, 05 Oct 2007 08:24:00 PST

oh man...

oh man, oh man, oh man... I'm leaving this country in less than two months. And I don't think I'm coming back again. How am I supposed to deal with this? How am I supposed to get over myself? How am I...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Sat, 29 Sep 2007 11:14:00 PST

Ew, Hugh Grant...

I've been feeling all needy and lovey lately. I woke up this afternoon all needy and lovey and hungover for the third day in a row and decided to take matters into my own hands. So I slicked my unwash...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Mon, 24 Sep 2007 09:15:00 PST

How do you know when you have a problem/problems?

Seriously, how do you know? What qualifies as a problem? Who defines it? Maybe I've been reading too many advice columns lately, but I'm starting to wonder if I have issues (in the standard advice col...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Tue, 18 Sep 2007 11:22:00 PST

Whatever Lola wants...

Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta. I'd always been ...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Mon, 17 Sep 2007 10:26:00 PST

Raindrops keep falling on my own private garbage dump

It's raining. Hard. I can hear it splattering on my collection of garbage bags I have artistically displayed on my back balcony. The Minami Gyotoku trash seperating system proved too difficult for me....
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Tue, 11 Sep 2007 05:50:00 PST

Doo doo doo di doo doo dum

In case you couldn't tell, the subject of this blog is the Mario song. That's right, ladies and gents. I've gone over to the dark side. Or the hand-held video game side, to be more accurate. After tur...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Thu, 30 Aug 2007 08:25:00 PST

What I did for Summer Vacation

Internet cafes just don't do it for me. When I write a blog I want to be relaxed, have plenty of time, a full pack of cigarettes and a bottle of red wine. Now I have a creaky chair, a man snoring away...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Wed, 22 Aug 2007 06:45:00 PST

Loooong overdue update (which really isn't an update)

Still in Japan. At least through November. Still no internet. Still dislike ikura and raw tentacles. So, today: I taught a class on using the passive voice. A class on the passive voice being u...
Posted by Rach Against the Machine on Fri, 20 Jul 2007 06:47:00 PST