Texas Brand Harlot - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I'm a creative, strong, outspoken, irrevrent, ecclectic fag; Minneapolis by way of Houston... I drink too much, yet I work my ass off... terminal illnesses and racial stereotyping amuse me and I mock them at any given moment; people are too PC these days... I always say I'm going to quite smoking,yet after 17 yrs its failed to stick... My guilty pleasures include (but not limited to) champagne, Hot Pink Delorean, Mario Diaz (but WITH the mullet), vintage fur, OnePhatDeeva, BladeRunner, cheap gold jewelry, gay truckers and The Pointer Sisters... I work retail, have for eleven years now, and yes, I do love every bit of it... A "drink or two" never happens that way. I can ghetto rig anything... I will walk all over you if you make yourself available... I stress the modifier and not the adjective... porn and alcohol fix everything... I love the Fall and Winter... I dig the new wave electro ghetto glam crunk funk that seems to torment djs at the moment... I will never be able to exit a car gracefully... I will be a bit crude, and inappropriate crap falls out of my mouth at the worst possible times... I've come to love who I am, and look forward to who I'm going to be...
oh...
and yes...
I AM a typical Scorpio.

My Interests

porn. discodust. rock n republic. marty mcflys jeans. retail. puerto rican cocks. the golden girls. jackie beat. zara. original sin with drunk becky. hot pants. american apparel. your mother on a cross.

I'd like to meet:

Yo mamma... if she got a high top fade.

Music:

You name it, I dig it. Bob Sinclar. Joey Negro. Cassius. Benjamin Diamond. Esthero. Goldfrapp. Simian Mobile Disco. Blonde Redhead. Feist. Really old school disco house that came out 2000 to 2003. The Bird and the Bee. Hot Pink Delorean. Junior Boys. Calvin Harris. Soulflys. Spiderbait. Biggie Small. Lil Kim. Tiga. Dirty Sanchez. Roxy Cottontail. Steed Lord. Klever. The Fitness. Soulsearcher. Soulwax. Freemason remixes. Superfunk. Basement Jaxx. Metallica. Everything from down 'n dirty Disco House to twangy ass old school Country to Death Metal.

Movies:

All time fav... House of Yes. Anything with Parker Posey really. Death Becomes Her. The Hours. Running With Scissors. Stargate. Birth. Pride and Prejudice. Mansfield Park. Cannibal Holocaust. Dawsons 20 Load Weekend. Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolfe. The Adams Family. The Fifth Element. Sister Mary Explains it All. Hedwig and the Angry Inch. The Wiz. Hello, Dolly!. Best In Show. Plantin' Seed. Hard Candy. Wristcutters. Pans Labrynth. Star Wars. Girls Will Be Girls. Indiana Jones. The Labrynth. The Excorcist. Amtyville Horror. Carrie. Misery. The list goes on...
no really... forEVER!

Television:

Suze Orman is really the only dyke on tv that can keep my ever shrinking attention span. Shes my hero.

Books:

Exit To Eden
Invisible Monsters
Cry To Heaven

Heroes:

Myself.

My Blog

yea bitches...

you just remember who started the champagne addictionnigga.
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Tue, 29 Jan 2008 08:41:00 PST

I remember...

Jetting around downtown in a sleek little automobile, burned CD's full of throbbing House thumping through vibrating speakers, shaking the rear-view. Vodka slowly pulsing through your chest as the war...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Fri, 25 Jan 2008 03:30:00 PST

Make Cupcakes, Not War...

This woman is driving down the road... it's a rainy night. She finds some cradle waiting to be robbed of the upper teen persuasion hitchhiking on the side of the road with no umbrella and s...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Fri, 04 Aug 2006 03:13:00 PST

Austin...

April on the bar at Coyote Ugly'sUs severly frustrated and delirious at not being able to find a hotel room.Some shit hole called Fuel.imma steal their couch though. Dont drive home drunk. We just cou...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Fri, 23 Jun 2006 04:32:00 PST

Global Personality Results... Quite Interesting.

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion |||||||||||||||| 70_td> Stability |||||||||||| 46_td> Orderliness |||||||||||||| 60_td> Accommodation |||||||||||| 43_td> Interdep...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Thu, 05 Jan 2006 03:34:00 PST

cum

Wouldn't that be great to have some fantastic awe inspiring love affair like the one Morticia and Gomez Addams have? I mean, to have someone just wanna orgasm after watching you pick out gum at CVS, a...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Fri, 16 Dec 2005 03:58:00 PST

Fun With Fur!!

I luv my lil sister Katie... She's almost as awsome as me... ...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Tue, 06 Dec 2005 07:58:00 PST

Prudence B. Fantastic

So yes, im sure you are all wondering, "Who is Prudence, and why is this pig posted all over **mykee's page?" Well childrens, I too was just like you... Until I discovered the magic that is Prudence. ...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Sat, 05 Nov 2005 01:27:00 PST

JUST SHUT UP & DO IT!!

1. Who are you? 2. Are we friends? 3. When and how did we meet? 4. Do you have a crush on me? 5. Would you kiss me? 6. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it. 7. Describe me in one word. 8. ...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Wed, 12 Oct 2005 12:28:00 PST

i want that----->

A VALEDICTION FORBIDDING MOURNING. by John Donne AS virtuous men pass mildly away, And whisper to their souls to go, Whilst some of their sad friends do say, ...
Posted by Texas Brand Harlot on Tue, 06 Sep 2005 12:42:00 PST