..5Playing in the middle of all these trees... Barney... Barney....Hello. Noise Machine are a bang volume of Dublin in Ireland. We were educated two thousands and two. Our first concert was in a Dublin publication, which was called ' "O'Neills" '. If you liked to arrive at this publication, it is near the "helmet", a popular Dublin land marking. The helmet has a diameter of 3m (10 ft) at the lower surface and narrowed to 15cm (6 inside) at the top side. This forms it for view a little like an enormous sewing needle. It is the highest sculpture of the world. It was originally intended that the helmet is accomplished up to the 2000 in honours of the new millenium, but structure was retarded. The monument became as part again sketched road of a plan 1999 to assign. O'Connell road (the broadest and most famous road in Ireland; in former times Sackville road was noticed) into acceptance of the seventies to have entered.
Some people blamed the appearance of the high-speed lunch restaurants and the opening of the department for special offers buy, all using inexpensive plastics, obviously uninteresting and obtrusive business confronted, the existence of a number of given up places of assembly and the one-sided decision Irish Republican Army, in order to blow up Nelson post, as reasons for the acceptance in a once famous and attractive road. This our first concert, Noise Machine The Nights of the Round Table were required. We had an extra member, who had to go because confirmed of handling that Irish Republican Army. During the time of day this concert went on and further. Panister Fatheroy broke his tooth off. It was a very small splinter and was never found.
Our first album is called Secret Sins of the Father and such successes as received into the caricature contains and ...And that Man in the Photograph was Actually a Friend of my Father part 2 of 2. This album was noted in the house of the Eddy Comeback.
We played then lots of concerts in the Voodoo Lounge along the banks of the River Liffey. Concerts increase the pressure. They became hotter and hotter. Like a pressure cooker approximately for exploding, a second album of the Noise Machine was noted in the different areas.
It kept a Force to be Reckoned With and had twenty five songs. It contained an industrial unattendedu Penalize Me and underwater smash Oil Production Xircus. If you listen to all twenty five songs in a line , you will feel worn out and terrible. After this we did a competition in Newbridge in Kildare, Ireland. This resulted in the album Noise Machine Live in Newbridge, which is in Newbridge phases. Which had four songs, which were called the phases Oil Production Circus, Riverdance, which are phases, live phases O and Ninety-Nine Faust Balloons.
Thoughts of this ZZAP smooth Noise Machine!! You are a good name for an album, therefore we tried to note an album around the name giving of the album ZZAP!!. New exercises like Second Shoebox with Spore and Acceleration Rifle Bullet (Speeding Bullet) were noted and set on a CD called ZZAPPETIZER!!! Billy Ray Dragon copied this CDs with its know-how, but he was furious so And He was so Madly in Love with Her... had not yet balloon and horn. This was not anybodys disturbance, it is fine.
Babyfest in the village saw a toy baby to swing from a line over Noise Machine. Panister Fatheroy found the baby on the side of the road. With Flebenrast in the cool Templebar Music Center in Dublin, The Toast had on a black waistcoat without cases.
Were you ever at the Sugar Club? Noise Machine, which played there on December 19 two thousands and five with the Subway Waste Apes, another volume from Ireland. You can see what happened here . Generally Eddy Comeback keeps regarded to The Toast or Panister Fatheroy on doing this thing, if he plays, he turns around and does little smile. Billy Ray Dragon keeps always pretending to not look, but he is like, "why does he not do that me?". In the Sugar Club on the 19th, he struck his bass unit on its drums so strongly that it broke the knee of The Toast twice. The fact that night it ascends he sung with The Toast for the beginning of Ninety Nine Faust Balloons fast, ran back to his drums and began to play. In order to be honest, I think that he ran straight away after we were terminated.
Noise Machine started not seeing eachother much more. Billy Ray Dragon was too busy training to stand like a doctor, Eddy comeback had become heavily interested in tennis, Panister Fatheroy had become possessed with recieving things for free, and The Toast was addicted to drugs and to white spirits.
However, around the end of March, Noise Machine recorded five songs with Thor , a man. It is in Wexford somewhere. God white, we found it though. We admitted What Happened to the Horce, Oil Production Circus, ...And that Man in the Photograph was Actually a Friend of my Father part 2, Purple Jellyfish and Face Attack. Thinking we wrote it to more than thrash on a paper strip. We were ensured top speed: which, if somewhat wrongly goes. It failed well! Noise Machine's music spans many dimensions.
In the back garden of the Billy jet on a fine green one and a blue shoot later. Panisters pink and yellow meat registered the third colors inside, in order to Penalize Me, whirls temporary fastener cart-loads of the comeback can under the racing Panister be seen, while he runs after Eddy Comeback. It was an immediate feeling. It is amazing, which one can do on a Shoestringbudget:
After Christmas briefly in Whelans of the Wexford road. We did a concert. The pressure was switched on. Whelans sports richly walls and the music press is well famous for the manufactured, more correct groups playing here. On the song ' Disco ' everything we fell apart, but the suprise was, as we were back together drawn. Those is the magic of the adhesive in the noise machine. This is which me helps, Panister Fatheroy sleep at night. Everything it accumulated, at least I thinks so back. Penis Panisters also later put out, what by flowers Christmas remained. What followed was a series of spactacles inside the hellish taverns of Dublin.
Binne and barrel binder, the mark a screen for Acceleration Rifle Bullet of both are. It was to the last degree and took part to the James Bond professionally. All hair was out. Briefly after, form The Toast its hair the color of a dead Christmas tree. This Christmas has an effect on us all.
Then. In Octokalis Jolt's Skytavern a Pig was introduced. Screaming he shot under Femi Bastoranto's legs like a speeding bullet. It blows the shineirons so fast it made Eddy toilet. The pig posed his own two brave hands on the machine, the Noise Machine. The Toast turned into Octokalis Jolt. Billy Ray Dragon turned into Femi Bastoranto. With Noise Machine moving hornwise the band became a twenty-four hour facility. Doors open allowing the customer second shoebox with spore. Snake with an Arse. Disco.
As is time the standing with bass is a pinger. The eletronic spool sfound in Noise Macinein ares nots forrr de raboon paroon. Salvon twarbles mallory find the cinema screening to take the video tho the next level. Philip See More Hoffmann's . Big. Whit Fuck. Theses guys lied on beds with their faces hidden under blackets, thrusting up toward the ceiling slowly. Eddy Comeaack swung from a tree and Oktokalis Jolt shitted in a urinal. The accompanymusic was a slow homage to hollywood with hip hop beats nd an electronic voice, a repetitive broon, now with v-brakes and deadly suspension. Octokalis' big mammy hands swung from sied to sied
So the next day this guy, yeah, a pornographer called O'Leary, he just went out and got this mad expensive camera and well almost immediately got busy beeing around the front of shows shooting the band onto video. But this was not the usual affair of man grabs camera and shoots, this guy was taking his role a documentator to wicked extremes. Everyone in the audience was made uneasy by this guy I hate to say. The opinion among critics was that this guy was getting too close to the band for someone that was not, well, their boyfriend. Because of the open and accepting nature that Noise Machine's B.O.M. tries to put across in all official publications, the band had become quite accepting of behaviour such as this. It was, after all 2007/2008! So the fact is that some people don't like this closeness, but the band don't (unless they're lying) have a problem with the behaviour, and that's the deciding factor... so the guy stays.
After getting a big bus down to Galway, the lads stumbled across Eyre Square to a gig underground. Obvious thighs were flashed to a seated congregation who eyed up this Dublin band and made us groan. The deadlyness increased as the rain flooded the streets into rivers. Due to the unnatural slope of the area, people were sliding at speed down to a big clean lake beside the trainstation.
Over Christmas, usually Noise Machine's most festive period, everything had to be put on hold because Panister was gone. He had went to America. The story goes that he went to America not to get away from Noise Machine for a while but in fact he did. Not that he had a problem or anything, it was just getting too "sticky". The TDs that he said he was meeting in California were made up and reports suggest that he spent most of the time alone in his rented flat. This is where he got the habit of getting sick into shoes, an American fashion. The general trend in Noise Mallchine was now one of moving outwards. Whether it be within the Republic, to different countries or generally splitting up and reconnecting, the band were becomming more... well.. elastic. While the band say that this is because they need the room to explore, they know a more worldly image will make the band a more marketable product. Things were different now, way different than in 92, the band were turning around 22 and they needed to think more seriously than the freaky motherfuckers they were, systems had to be put in place. Noise Machine decided to employ a manager. That's all we can say.
A trip down memory land when Noise Machine once again took to the stage in the Voodoo Lounge with Count Tornado and thee Z Walkers. Moments such as this, being left cold and alone on the stage, forces one to look inwards. This is why I believe all members continue to carry on with this icing on the cake of life. Skiing through small plastic Christmas trees and letters that appear giant considering how small we are compared to how big this cake is. All you can hear up there is the sick little laughs of banana-shoed scenesters and aweful, aweful music.
Then to Karma, inbetween Christchurch and Thwarnub's Gauf, Octokalis Jolt began his little experiment. His head brought along wunada yellow tubes offa Kinder egg. The guitar jack ting stuck straight into between his boobs and he became pregnant straight away. His fat buttocks showing signs even before the gig was over. The sceptacle robumboid bounced from the audience two and fro as audiobots in da back who knew Eddy Comeback thought forward to when a double barrel shot gun was introduced to the stage by the band's maddened singer. Apparently the idea of the shotgun was to remove any of the personality from the singer. So... em... anyone who looks on can only see the human body, some clothes, and the shotgun. Such is the struggle.
Paces then slowed once more as February's bastard wind started blowing bad infections down Panister's throats. All business had to be stalled while Panister laid in bed all day wanking in his flat and getting sick into shoes. The shoe could be delaced and the vomit examined. Through this method Fatheroy was able to self diagnose his own illness and create medicins. All activitat was reduced to a series of informal business blastings with the Board of Management in Dublin's pubs and clubs. Panister took no part in these activitat, instead he nursed himself better with pots of yogurt and 10 Weetabix.
Then sumething unexpected happened. Panister Fatheroy took Eddy Comeback out for a curry. It was the usual affair with sausage shaped snacks and glasses of water. The two of them spent a few hours there on George's Street talking and looking out the window. There was nothing extraordinary about this until a pattern started to emerge. Fatheroy began to expect Comeback to appear at the take-away/restaurant almost every day. Granted, for about one in three days Comeback would manage to make it, but Fatheroy's visits bagan to take up a substantial amount of time. It became clear that these visits were replacing practicing and gigging with the band. Eventually Eddy Comeback saw this pattern and refused to attend Fatheroy's "curry dates" entirely. This caused a great deal of distress for Fatheroy who was beginning to show signs of psychosis. He would invite strangers off the street in for a curry after taking ecstasy tablets and would talk nonsense while splashing his food on the table. He was eventually banned from the restaurant.
Appen..omy. The guys in the band would make a long line with their instruments and march around tennis courts, bowling greeens, indoor soccer pitches etc. They would allow themselves to be dazzled by the floodlights and would make music immediately after using salvaged brass instruments, now turned a dull brown.
Octokalis Jolt was the next one to get sick. He started nibbling on the insane root and saw animal shapes everywhere he looked, especially cats. "That's not a cat, man" the boys would chorus.
Returning from the antipodes back into the scene, Panister staged a full recovery. However Octokalis, upon hearing Panister's tales, now wanted to go there himself. It was in these remote areas that legendary
figures would take refuge to become skilled in the art of farcecraft - to make small things seem like... bombs.
Yawn is this still fucking goin on? Following the remainder of the feim that came from the stony Dublin streets of Jolt's mind, thurning a corner and revealing a brown door with some street writing on it and down a set of stone stairs where the sun shines in through cracks to where all the equipment is kept. The band praactice here, with other jazz musicians in suits and tie. Before this halfway house between the band's homes and the stage, this little cluttered room took them out of Eddy's house where the situation had become unworkable. Because it was his house, Eddy would often take a turn about the garden. Feeling smug he would walk unbelievable slowly around the sunny grass, stopping every now and then, and changing direction. The other lads could only watch from the window as they weren't allowed in the garden. Pig once started to cry because he wasn't allowed out.
Jolt's fantastic visions had not stopped either. While he would never miss practice or arrive late for shows, the members of the band would worry about him nonetheless. Coming home from his girlfriend's house one evening, Eddy Comeback caught sight of Jolt in his front garden, whispering softly "badger? badger?" as he rummaged beneath the undergrowth. As it was quite late, Comeback felt the need to write up the event in his journal once he got in the door. Heavy rains soon drove Jolt back inside.
And tensions still remained within the band. While most of the band would wear dress shoes to practice, Jolt would turn up in athletic shoes, dirty and worn-in. While it was beyond the duty of band members to make stylistic recommendations to other members, the general thought was that some things were obviously unacceptable. An annonymous letter was left beside Jolt's bed in Walkinstown and the next time the boys met for practice, a collective sigh of relief was heard as Jolt arrived in shiny black plastic women's shoes with large buckles.
Around this time, Jolt won a television competition to be a contestant on a general knowledge game show. The band were in serious debt and Jolt was resorting to whatever money-making scheme he could come up with. Jolt was doing well until the 30,000 pound question. He incorrectly answered 'pig with an arse' and immediately lost all money.
Also at this time, Comeback had alot of free time on his hands. He was visiting libraries around Dublin educating himself about previous farce bands. According to what Comeback had found out, these bands would spend their lives without leaving their medieval village, and would be buried in the town churchyard. It was in the library near Christchurch that he discovered 'The Max Farcina' - this being a name given to the entire body of work created by medieval farce bands. The farcina would be submitted to a council of learned gentlemen who would assess the material to determine it's place in the Farce Canon. Unknown to Comeback at this time, the council was still in operation, however the number of council members had considerably decreased.
This turnip yeah... during a thunderstorm he wrote all this shit on the equipment one day. Who knows how he got in. Well the stuff he wrote wasn't too nice. He was never found, but Jolt has an idea who it was. Apparently some guy dressed in white trousers and a torn black jacket, thick and roughened like a carpet, was cruising the underground areas on his own. Well he was never caught but reports suggest that on that same night he took to these areas on a sex rampage. Jolt is convinced it was him for two reasons. One being the semen found in the practice room after the night of the rampage; the other being the room's underground status. Jolt was never too comfortable with the stairs that lead down to the room. Ever since he moved into his loft room, he has never felt right at ground level or below.
Meanwhile, Femi Bastranto's alter-ego, the electronic fabulist Tobias Fisch, was still busy trying to find the right outfit for his son's debut as principal dancer in pantomime. He was thinking of a brown tweed jacket but didn't like what he found in most shops, "too synthetic", he said. He had recently tried to write a song about the experience with Octokalis. But Fisch had trouble finding the time to write songs beside Jolt, who was only available at 9:30pm, when he returned from work, and 4am, when he returned from his parties. Yet Fisch found the latter time unworkable because of Jolt's state at this time of night, his seizuring hands creating preposterous melodies that were a far cry from the nice-sounding jazz that Fisch had in mind for the song. Tobias Fisch had to wait outside Jolt's workplace at half nine to catch him before he got a bus somewhere and got lost. Nevertheless a song was eventually written, it wasn't representative of what Tobias Fisch had in mind but it did have a certain charm. Together, they converted the song into mp3 format and uploaded it to the internet.
After Christmas 2008, two men called John and Michael Boswoll entered the scene. Panister, Eddy, Jolt and Bastoranto were having tea in a cafe when these two men approached them claiming an interest in the band. The band were taken aback my their golden tanned skin and shining white clothes so they let the two men join them at their table. They said that they had just come aboard from a global cruise on some millionaire's yacht. The two men put the band at ease and the six of them moved from the cafe to a pub and on to a club. At about 4am they ahiled a maxi-taxi and went back to Bastoranto's house near the Liffey Valley shopping centre, he had a free house for the weekend. The six of them stayed up for a few hours in the living room, they were watching tv and laughing, smoking cigarettes, drinking cans and there was also a packet of biscuits. Jolt slept on the couch, Bastoranto slept alone in his room, Panister slept in the double bed with John, and Eddy slept in the spare room with Michael. At about 10 am both Eddy and Panister remember the two men leaving their rooms, saying that they had to catch the yacht before it left for South America. The boys were half asleep and did not wake up properly until about 2, when they went downstairs to find both John and Michael curled up asleep beside Jolt in a half seated position beside Jolt on the couch. As this was happening, Bastoranto fell down the stairs still drunk from the night before, waking everybody up. John and Michael immediately got up, got dressed and walked out the front door. Eddy and Panister were asking them angry questions but they remained entirely silent. About a week later, Bastoranto read in a newspaper that both John and Michael Boswoll were in fact the same person.
Because...
I wear big white runners and purple polo necks.
I got my dollar bills, i dont use them flimsy checks.
Tall hair shaved at the sides is the image of my peers.
Poking fun at mr. spocks big old fuckin ears.
Chasing my womans lover with a baseball bat.
Im gonna fuck you up you filthy little rat.
Fuckin drug lords playing on the wrong side of the law.
Drinkin rum straight up through a motherfuckin straw.
Getting on my fume will make my eyes dilate
But wearing 3D specs will make me less irate.
Bad crack stuck me in court and i will lose
So i will put bananas in that fucking judges shoes.
The jaffa cakes i lifted from the mall were soaked in goo
So i sold my ghetto blaster and checked terminator 2.
Daddys big soft hands are always getting stuck
Up phillip seymour hoffmans big white fuck.
Noise Machine Discography:
Secret Sins of the Father
A Force to be reckoned With
Noise Machine Live in Newbridge
ZZAPETIZER!!
What Happened to the Horce EP
Noise Machine Live DVD FOR YOU
The Very Worst of Noise Machine
Stampaedophile EP
