GENNADI OREL.
i miss you
You were the only one who understood me.
You were my best friend.
I love you so much, I miss you so much.
You saved me, and you fixed me.
Im sorry i could never save you.
I wish you were still here.
The word 'love' was never enough to describe our relationship.
But that word will always belong to you.
Why did you have to go ?
Our lives had only just begun.
I cant live mine without you.
I need you to breath.
I cant do this without you.
You will always remain in much more than my heart.
I love you so much and i miss you more than i could ever have imagined possible.
I will never say goodbye.
But i will say REST IN PEACE.
We were never able to stay apart.
We would try. My god we would try ..
But we couldn't resist each other.
We couldn't breath without sharing the same air.
Now that your gone, i can no longer breath.
I am lost. I am scared. And i miss you more than words could ever say.
Why did you have to go ? We made a promise to do this together.
You were suppose to wait for me.
Now im alone and living in a world without you.
A world i no longer know.
If death is the only way to be with you again, then so be it.
I miss you so much Gee. I love you darling. I hope you will always be with me. I know ill always be with you.
The creation of life was a dream of our's.
It was the one thing we wanted. The one experience we craved to share so much.
A family of our own. A family together.
We would name our little girl Ariel.
We would marry in Mount Penang Gardens, as you knew of all the dragonflies that flew there.
We would have a life together. A heart together.
We were one baby.
I may have lost you physically, but i will never lose your soul.
The part of me that disappeared when i lost you, has been replaced with yourself.
We are one.
Until the day i die, i will continue your life for you.
We will be together again. One day.
I have been hurt and used. I have lost my partner in life before i had even turned eighteen. I have tried to overdose. I have tried to drown myself. I have made over 100 cuts on the top of my leg alone. I have suffered depression most of my life. But have gotten worse over the past two years. Yet i still live my life every day with my head held high.
I struggle, but i carry on. I live for the people around me. I live to make others happy. My purpose in life is to put the smile on their face, no matter how hurt i get in the process.
I have been abused. I have been used for sexual purposes. I have been put down for sheer enjoyment. I have had nearly everyone i had met, including doctors, try to force me to admit to having an eating disorder, even though i eat more than someone who weighs 30 kilos more than me. I have been called a slut for my artistic abilities and told that i am worth nothing but to be used for someones sexual happiness.
I still live. I still breath. I still smile. I may not be happy, but i am on the road to recovery. I have the man of my dreams by my side the entire way. The man who will father my child. I have the soul of Gennadi pushing me not to give up. Not to get hurt or put down. Only to strive for more. To strive for greatness. To strive for love.
I have all i need. I am on the road to a great recovery.
♥ Rated M15+. May contain course language.
My name is Bunny.
I search for only one thing in life.
And that is love.
I found my love. But I lost it.
Now I will learn from that. And learn to be strong.
Its time for me to move on.
Leo Buscaglia had once said,
" Love is life. And if you miss love, you miss life. "
Trust is something I do not give out.
You will never gain my trust.
But if you do, I will be your’s forever more.
They call me the human bat.
I am un-naturally nocturnal.
I cannot stand to be awake during the day.
I wake when the sun sets, and rest when the sun rises.
I fear many things most would not fear.
Some include: throwing up, webcams, water, and sleep.
The fear that would crush my hopes and dreams,
is losing the man i love.
I am unique in my own special ways, as you are to your's.
I have a passion for Jaguars and Dragonflies.
They entrance me.
Seeing me blush is an exciting event as it does not happen often.
Only one man has made me blush out of love.
Robin Hood:Men In Tights.
This is what runs my life, along-side love.
I will never tolerate the words Naughty and Horny being spoken to me.
Write me a love ballad, and i will be eternally great full.
The giving of love is an education in itself.
- Eleanor Roosevelt.
I am taken. I am happy. I am in control.
I do not flirt. I do not cheat. I am no slut. My body belongs to my partner’s only. I am taken by Rohann. And will always remain that way. I have been hurt many times in the past. I have been used for sexual purposes that I am not proud of. I have lived more of a life than any 17 year old should ever have to live. But I am strong. And I carry on with a smile on my face and my head held high. I am not happy. But I am in control. I found my soul mate at the age of Sixteen. I wouldn’t give up that part of my life for anything. I found myself and my purpose the day I met Gennadi. We forever more remained ONE. We always will remain ONE. I may have lost him physically, but I will never lose him soul. A part of me had been taken the day he passed away. But that part has been replaced with himself. With his soul. We share the same body and mind. We are ONE. I feel no pain or sadness towards this loss. He keeps me strong. Stops any pain from entering my heart. Even if that means I have to remain numb for the rest of my life, he will never let me feel this pain. But now, I have found the next best thing to a soul mate. I have found Rohann. My best friend of three years. I finally opened my eyes to see what was infront of me the entire time. Now we are happily together, and are having a child. I love him more than life itself and will never let him go. He is not my world. He is my heart.
Life goals must be accomplished before death:
Have a child.
Get a tattoo.
Smoke for the first time.
Get my lip pierced.
Get belly button pierced.
Gain back my 10,000 myspace friends.
Get a new phone.
Be truly happy with someone.
Have a two way hook up.
Get drunk for the first time.
Get my licence.
Get a scooter.
Go to The Bahamas.
Be truly proud of myself.
Walk down the street naked.[or just underwear]
Write a book.
Get a tan.
Steal an asian kid.
Make out with a celebrity.
Throw skittles at someone while on my death bed.
Get a photo with a tarantula.
Wisdom begins in wonder:
Fact: I want a child at 17.
Fact: I cant resist good chinese food.
Fact: I am confused about my sexuality.
Fact: I sometimes have urges to kill.
Fact: I am not happy.
Fact: I still slightly believe in Santa Clause.
Fact: I dress like a slut but am not one myself.
Fact: I sleep with multiple teddy bear's.
Fact: I never make the first move.
Fact: Im afraid to live alone.
Fact: I hate being thanked for something i am forced to do.
Fact: Im cooler than your mum.
My babies.♥
RIP Sparticus =<[/b>
Anyone can own your heart, but there is only one person who can own your soul.
Blogs:
Lesson's to be learnt.
The secret's to my heart.
Eternity to the end.
The grip on humanity.
Quench your thirst.