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About Me

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I have been married to a wonderful man since August 17, 2002. We live in West Virginia. I am writing a book to tell my daughters story. I like helping people any way I can. Mosie works as a painter here and I work at a pediatricians office. I love my job for the first time in a long time. I get to play peek-a-boo and make sick kids feel better. How great is that. Plus I am able to protect them for the rest of their lives by giving them their immunizations. We love it in W.V. we wake up on vaction every day!

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I am a
My daughter Alexandria was an

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My husband and I got each other tattoos for our wedding. He got "Space Your Face" on his arm. And I got Peace, Love and Harmony on my leg. (The pics of my tattoos are below.) You see the artist who did it for me also drew it out as a request from me.2 1/2 years after I got that tattoo, I went to a 2 day seminar that changed my life in ways I could not even have imagined. Mountian Removers helped me forgive myself and others surrounding my daughters' life and death. About a month after I forgave people and circumstances, even God, I re-gained my daughters memories. Everything that I had blocked out because it hurt to bad to just deal with it. I had focused on the day that she died in that hospital for nearly six years. The questions, the resentment, the pain, the unexplianable, unbearable feeling of emptyness that no-one except that baby that I lossed could fill. Once I took on "acceptance" I regained every memory of my precious little girl. From the time I found out that I was pregnant, to the first ultrasound, to the first kick, to labor. From the first time I saw her, smelled her, held her, kissed her, heard her cry. Everything from the day we spent at the park, her playdate with Halston, her playdates with her dad and his family. To the time we went up north to see Grandma and Pepa. And all the time that we got to spend with Nana Nette, Papa Rick and Uncle Ryan. Not to mention all of our friends and family.That August I went to Mountian Removers again, this time I took on Peace, Love, and Harmony. I thought about it later realizing that things really do happen for a reason. I got my life's motto placed on my body three years before I realized what it was.

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Your aura shines Blue!
What Color Is Your Aura?
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Which Musical Artist Are You?
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My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Sugarland, Reba, Oprah, Ellen, Pretty much any strong successful, independant woman that I look up to. As well as women interested in knowing more about thier bodies and how to give and receive pleasure behind closed doors. Oh and Johnny Depp "SOOOOO HOT! WANT TO TOUCH DE HINEY!!"


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My Blog

Happy Birthday Alexandria Lee Smith!! I Love You!!

My first born daughter would have turned 10 years old on Sunday March 29.  I am not sure how to "deal" with this. Being pregnant, about to have her first baby sister, is making this year more difficul...
Posted by on Wed, 25 Mar 2009 13:41:00 GMT

Update on Easter Weekend

Well my work is not off on Good Friday, and because I had it off last year they won't give it to me again. So I will have to work Friday morning, which means we can't leave until around 1:00pm on Frid...
Posted by on Thu, 19 Mar 2009 07:44:00 GMT

Harmonie Marie's Ultrasound Pics

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Posted by on Sat, 07 Mar 2009 09:33:00 GMT

IT'S A GIRL!!!!!

Here are the latest pics. They were taken 2/27/09, one month after the last belly pic and on my 31st birthday.  Harmonie's Nursey is slow going, but atleast we are making progress. The characters on t...
Posted by on Sun, 01 Mar 2009 19:23:00 GMT

BABY RUDERMAN

Mosie and I went through the first and only round of in-vitro in October. It worked!! We will be parents around July 5, 2009. We are going to find out what the baby is around February 19th by 3d ultra...
Posted by on Sat, 17 Jan 2009 16:20:00 GMT

It is for sale on PublishAmerica.com

It is for sale on PublishAmerica.com   ..TR> ..TR align=middle> Send an Electronic Postcard Now! My Angel Alexandria: A Mother's Story of Losing the Light of Her LifeKendra E. Ruderman ...
Posted by on Sat, 30 Aug 2008 11:21:00 GMT

My Angel Alexandria

My book will be available sometime in late August.  I will keep you updated. Thank you all for your support. Love, Kendra
Posted by on Fri, 01 Aug 2008 11:02:00 GMT

IVF

Mosie and I are going to do in-vitro in May 2008.   Please send prayers for us.
Posted by on Fri, 09 May 2008 14:30:00 GMT

I am going to be a published author

I wrote a book about Alexandria's life and death. It will be published sometime soon.  I will let you all know when and where so you can get a copy.    
Posted by on Fri, 09 May 2008 14:28:00 GMT

IVF???

I am soooo frustrated!! We went to see a fertility specailist on 1/10/08. He gave us our options of... 1. do nothing and volunteer your time 2. adopt, 100% gaurantee for a child 3. IVF, 50 - 60% chanc...
Posted by on Tue, 15 Jan 2008 10:27:00 GMT