taken down by the 5-0 |
Well, the fuzz got me. I was having a bad day, got a little tipsy off of Boon's Farm, went out to deliver the papers on my bike and whamm-o I got pulled over for a DUI. Can you believe it?...
Posted by janet on Tue, 01 Jul 2008 12:26:00 PST |
I think I broke my butt?? |
The doctor says I have anal fissures, and not just your run of the mill anal fissures, but freakishly large fissures. I think that explains the smell of death emitting from my ass, but where did...
Posted by janet on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 02:53:00 PST |
my sore |
I woke up this morning with a festering sore in my crack. I think it was from my anal leakage. It smells like rotting hamburger or something. I think I should go to the doctor but I ...
Posted by janet on Wed, 18 Jun 2008 02:04:00 PST |
woe is me! |
Well, friends....as if I haven't enough problems now I have anal leakage. It just started yesterday and I have blown through 15 pairs of underwear. I called Victoria's Secret to see if I c...
Posted by janet on Mon, 09 Jun 2008 02:21:00 PST |
my period |
I have not had a period in 6 months. I am not sure if it is because I only eat one carrot or one lettuce leaf a day. I used to have heavy periods that lasted 2 weeks. Does anyone kno...
Posted by janet on Sun, 01 Jun 2008 09:54:00 PST |
my lunatic tool brother |
Why did I have to be born into a family with a brother who is a complete tool and retard? He craps at least 25 times a day and plugs up the toilet with his stinky lincoln logs. Those thing...
Posted by janet on Fri, 30 May 2008 11:25:00 PST |
same crap, different day |
Why can't I find a man??? I like lots of hair, back hair is ok. I like the smell of a sweaty man--deodorant just covers up the manly smell of a man. My hobbies are making potholders,...
Posted by janet on Sun, 25 May 2008 08:33:00 PST |
sickness |
Today I felt sick--I had major diarrhea. It had Cream of Wheat consistency. It smelled like rotting racoon carcass on the side of the road. I straight up disrepected that bathroom.&n...
Posted by janet on Sat, 24 May 2008 10:47:00 PST |
Me, of course! |
Today I barely ate anything. I ate one lettuce leaf and a carrot. That is why I am so beautiful. I did drink one glass of water with 2 ice cubes. I am cutting back tomorrow.&nb...
Posted by janet on Wed, 21 May 2008 06:52:00 PST |
too cute |
Why was I born so cute? Sometimes it is a blessing, but sometimes it is a curse. There are times when being beautiful hurts my heart. I don't know who wants to be around me for my be...
Posted by janet on Fri, 18 Apr 2008 09:51:00 PST |
