Kari profile picture

Kari

I just built a jet pack and I'll soon be famous...

About Me

One word describes me... but if that's all I wrote in my bio, then it would be a short and boring read. Having a pet ape, and living in San Francisco, can be difficult for someone like me who likes to balance a career and fun lifestyle - which includes going out to the local watering holes and dancing with my peeps. My ape's name is Charlie, and he's 18 years old. We are quite well known in the city for kicking up our heels and letting our hair down, but we try and keep the partying to the weekends because my career is important to me, and I don't want to end up like Tara Reid. Charlie loves to go out, and he gets upset with me when we can't go out on a Tuesday night because I have to work the next day. He knows that he's an ape and he can't be going out by himself or else he might get snatched by the SF Zoo, or Paris Hilton who stole that Kinkajou from my friend in LA!!! Evil girl!My philosophy in life is to be nice and have common sense. There's more to this philosophy, but I don't want to bore you (or wow you) with my philosophies.I love people who can make me laugh. Dry humor and sarcasm are big turn ons. While I'm 99% a lady, I have 1% of me that's like an 8 year old boy and I will cry from laughing if someone accidentally: trips and falls, trips and doesn't fall, toots, has tourettes, etc... I've seen it all, and I'm not laughing AT these people, just purely the comical situation. I'd much rather have someone laugh with me when I eat shit in front of a crowd of people, than having them pretend it didn't happen. To be crystal clear, to 'eat shit' refers to tripping and falling down, fairly hard. A good ole' fashion fall to the ground. Didn't want the 1% of the population who's never heard that expression before, and who's landed on my profile, to think I'm some sort of shit eating weirdo or something because that is totally disgusting.Charlie's been waiting patiently for me to finish this profile, drinking his chilled Franzia and impatiently groaning, so it's time I begin rallying for the evening. Thank you and goodnight.

My Interests

Hardcore hip hop dancing for parties, $250/hr. I bring my own gear, boom box, glow sticks, hair spray and lighter, and card board box for when I do my break dance sequence.

I'd like to meet:

People who are fun and lovely. I also want to meet the person who had a hand in creating the Honda Clearance commercial, which showcases the cartoon character 'Mr. Opportunity', who appears to be in his mid-late thirties. Especially the version which includes all of the out takes from 'Mr. Oppty' fubbing up his lines. No words will be exchanged, I just want to stare at this person and shake my head for a solid 5 minutes, and then leave. I want to meet people who have access to fun things, like a boat or cool three legged dog.

Music:

I like all music. That's a lie, I like the majority of music, but don't feel like listing it all out in this section. If you want to see what I have on my I-pod, I'll send you the list.

Movies:

Similar to the music thing above. I love Arthur, the Jerk, Spinal Tap, Old School, Anchor Man, Usual Suspects, Airplane, etc... I like serious movies too, drama's, but I only want to list these for now.

Television:

Project Runway, Big Brother All-Stars, The Discovery Channel, PBS, all MTV reality TV shows in general, etc...

My Blog

Charlie and I say Goodbye Valley of the Cole&

It's Monday, and I'm working from home today while Charlie is packing up his room for our big move on Thursday, Feb. 1st. Charlie and I are headed back to Russian Hill, and we are both absolutely th...
Posted by Kari on Tue, 30 Jan 2007 01:22:00 PST

Charlie has a bee in his bonnet!

Good lord, there is nothing worse than Charlie getting his knickers in a twist, and as I write this, they're twisted and hiked so far up his fanny that I can nearly hear it.  I'm furious wit...
Posted by Kari on Thu, 09 Nov 2006 01:43:00 PST

Best hangover at work day EVER!

Well, it feels like winter here in London  and I'm actually quite enjoying the gloom because I'm hungover right now, and at work.  Admittedly, I'm a tired, but this may in fact be the best hango...
Posted by Kari on Fri, 06 Oct 2006 03:17:00 PST

Yes, I'm in London...

And as I write this, someone is getting their semi nightly pounding in the room above mine.  Got here on Tuesday, and when I am actually in my hotel, there is some serious stuff going on above me...
Posted by Kari on Fri, 29 Sep 2006 10:41:00 PST

Mammary duped me, and Charlie and Me was a farce&

Yes, it has been a while since I've spoken of Charlie and my adventures.  Everything was supposedly being documented in the filming of  'Charlie and Me', but I found out three months into th...
Posted by Kari on Sun, 10 Sep 2006 03:58:00 PST

Dorothy - click, click, click.

Friday night was one for the books.  What started off as going over to Tandy's house to take care of him after 'surgery', went to games night at the Cole Valley Mansion, then transitioned to an u...
Posted by Kari on Tue, 04 Apr 2006 12:04:00 PST

This rain may be a sign that I'm a Truman...

Can anyone explain why it's still raining?  I think we're all on something like the Truman Show and everything's about to end.  I'm about to launch a boat from Pier 23 (after I have a couple...
Posted by Kari on Tue, 04 Apr 2006 11:52:00 PST

The filming of Charlie and Me...

The filming of my new television series, Charlie and Me (or The Adventures of Charlie and Me) has been daunting and mildly frustrating.  We were spotted by a talent scout at the N Judah stop, whe...
Posted by Kari on Tue, 14 Mar 2006 09:55:00 PST