Bannkie - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I was born without any arms or legs and without a head. My father was determined that these setbacks would not hold me back, that like him, I would attend medical school and become a coal miner. He was ahead of his times and behind the times. He accused me of downloading porn and gave me 40 lashes. With no arms to defend myself I hit back in the only way I could. Through my interpreter, I called him a bigot. Enraged I went further than I should. I pointed out that it was the 1960s. That it was no porn, but a scud magazine [c.19 Gk. scudL. scuditis to play with oneself while wearing a glove] and the internet had not yet been invented. The split was irreconceivable. I became mute.

My Interests

I like to root around.

I'd like to meet:

Mary and all the other saints in heaven

Music:

Marching tunes

Movies:

My left foot. The remake my right foot wasn't up to scratch.

Television:

Yes I have one, but no license, so honest, I don't watch anything.

Books:

I love books that tell you how to be more intelligent, more honest, better looking. Also books that tell you how to better smelling and taller. My favourite are books that promise a complete makeover. Em maybe I'm confusing that with religion(s)?

Heroes:

1)Mum. Best in the world. She died when I was born, but did everything for me. 2)Dad. Never spared the lash, before ideological and other kind of spits and splits.

My Blog

old friends

I bought a packet of condoms from the Pakis shop in ..:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />Great Western Road, the one across the road, near the pub. I didn't ge...
Posted by Bannkie on Wed, 10 Oct 2007 03:58:00 PST

dream

I tried and it worked. I could fly. I gradually went higher scared yet thrilled by my ability. I was glad when I was over the Clyde. But I was also worried that I would drown. I wasn't sure if I could...
Posted by Bannkie on Mon, 01 Oct 2007 11:42:00 PST

Father Conroy

Father Conroy always brought a little bottle, the kind that was used as hip flasks, but he had filled it with holy water. He had his rosary beads always at the ready, lying, dangling from his wrist, w...
Posted by Bannkie on Sat, 29 Sep 2007 06:12:00 PST

Father Conroy

Father Conroy always brought a little bottle, the kind that was used as hip flasks, but he had filled it with holy water. He had his rosary beads at the ready, lying, dangling from his wrist, with the...
Posted by Bannkie on Thu, 27 Sep 2007 01:51:00 PST

Norean Killean

I have also obtained a report from the institute of Vocational Guidance. I have also conducted a full general physical examination and Norean does not exhibit any signs of sub normality and...
Posted by Bannkie on Wed, 26 Sep 2007 03:53:00 PST

Willie the Pole

Willie the Pole was a funny creature. There seemed to be something lackin in him, but he was a hardy enough old man, made out of his native blood and clay, buffeted by the harsh winds and rains of a c...
Posted by Bannkie on Tue, 25 Sep 2007 03:14:00 PST

Science

Observer magazine Holding back the years Tom Templeton meets Aubrey de Grey. 16/9/07 p27 The process of aging has three stages. The stage of chemical flux of our bodies (metabolism) gradually causes d...
Posted by Bannkie on Tue, 25 Sep 2007 01:47:00 PST

letters from the edge kind of thing

Hi, saw you. Know a bit how you feel. I have been married for about 35 years. It's not anybody's fault but things get a bit so so. You start kissing without as much passion. Even her nipples in y...
Posted by Bannkie on Wed, 15 Aug 2007 03:41:00 PST

friends

Sometimes I didn't know which book to steal, so I'd just take both of them. As my pal John said, it wasn't rocket science. All you needed was a sliver of silver paper and the right kind of look. Unfor...
Posted by Bannkie on Tue, 14 Aug 2007 04:14:00 PST

50 or 199 best

1) We were sitting on the stairs at Jimbos waiting for him, or his brother or someone, anyone to come. I wasn't much use to Wendy as I didn't have any snout and had never smoked. She might even have b...
Posted by Bannkie on Sun, 12 Aug 2007 02:48:00 PST