amandacathryn

AMANDA CATHRYN.
clearly.
So I have the voice of a 7-year-old girl far from puberty. And people tell me I either look older or younger than I am. My MySpace is full of detail to make it seem more exciting than it really is. When I'm typing at my computer and I have a song playing I'll often pretend my keyboard is a piano and my legs twist and my feet tap the ground with the rythym while my fingertips hit the keyboard and my head shifts and tosses. My shoulders act as if in a seizure while I mouth the words with more expression in my eyes than the look of Simba when his father falls off the cliff to the antelope where he meets his death. You want to get to know me, when all I can say is, this is me.
You know when you cry so much your rib cage shakes and your neck hangs down and then you get hair sticking to your face because of the tears that have trailed down your face? Your neck starts to hurt after awhile so you hold your head up to see the strings of words twice, both somewhat transparent. Then your fingers miss keys and you know that when you type back to them they're reading -screenname- has entered text. And you want to finish it, you really do, but you just need a minute to recoop. To regain control over the emotional disturbance inside. And your blinking now twice as much and your hands have to lift every now and then to wipe away those tears and your back starts to hurt from arching over the keyboard to see the letters better so you lean back and there are their words again. And you wish they were there, you wish they could feel your heartbeat "jumpstart" and you know this ones real in the back of your head and you wonder what is the reason youre really crying? It's not the pretty words. It's not the thought of them holding you close. It's how it defy's every possible word, emotion, physical action, or anything known by us. Unexplainable in some terms. Unfitting of words
It's like opening a package of 'Runts just to spill them and watch them scatter everywhere, and finding two oranges conjoined, and you try to pull them apart but then neither of them would be whole, because even if we were still in the same pack of 'Runts, I want to be that one connected to you. Cause they all get scattered later on; i don't want that.