Eliot Rosewater, while being faced with the problem of baptizing twins and not being a religious person, is asked by his wife via telephone:
'What will you say? What will you do?'
'Oh -- I don't know.' Eliot's sorrow and exhaustion dropped away for a moment as he became enchanted by the problem. A birdy little smile played over his lips. 'Go over to her shack, I guess. Sprinkle some water on the babies, say, 'Hello, babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. At the outside, babies, you've got about a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies --:
''God damn it, you've got to be kind.''
